Month: June 2023

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Full Transcript

The shark deck. Hey, what’s one all the pictures of John Oliver on Reddit High I’m Johnny Mack with your Daily Comedy News. Well, there’s some protesting going on. Long story short. Reddit is trying to get rid of third party apps, and people on Reddit are getting a little cranky.

So earlier in June, a bunch of subreddits became inaccessible to protest changes over how the site’s being run. Now, some have reopened, but some of the bigger subreddits, such as r slash awe, r slash picks, and r slash gifts have decided to add some rules. Moderators of the r slash picks subreddit said that it’s rules now only allows users to post pictures of John Oliver looking sexy, but they point out that any picture of the comedian is allowed because John Oliver is always sexy. Beat Davidson charged with reckless driving. Remember earlier this year he kind of crashed into a house or something like that.

Seemed like that kind of got blown over in celebrity court, you know that goes on. Well, no, no, no no. Greg Risling is the assistant chief of Media Relations at the La County District Attorney’s Office. And he said Pete Davidson being charged with one misdemeanor count of reckless driving. Pete will be arraigned on July twenty seventh.

Rising said, we believe that mister Davidson engaged in reckless driving which ultimately resulted in his involvement in a serious collision into a home. Luckily, no one was seriously injured as a result of this collision. We know that reckless driving can have devastating consequences. The incident happened back on March fourth, round eleven pm local time. Pete was driving a car and crashed into a fire hydrant in a home.

We’ll see what happens on July twenty seventh. Big Big kurfluffle involving Joe Rogan. Last week, Joe Rogan had on Robert F. Kennedy Junior. They had a discussion about the merits of vaccines.

Try and catch you up here. Rfk Junior suggested that routine vaccinations cause autisms. That prompted Peter hots His, who is dean for the National School of Tropical Medicine at Baylor College of Medicine in Houston, to label Kennedy’s statements as misinformation Hotsz retweeted vices story titled Spotify is stop even sort of trying to stem Joe Rogan’s vaccine misinformation. Hotez wrote, just awful and from all the online at tax I’m receiving after this absurd podcast, it’s clear many actually believed as nonsense. Joe Rogan then offered Hotez one hundred thousand dollars to debate RFK Junior on the Joe Rogan experience.

Hots Has responded, Joe, you have my cell, you have my email. I’m always willing to speak to you. Rogan called that reply a non answer. Hot Has said, Joe, if you’re serious about addressing vaccines, plus the fact that two hundred thousand unvaccinated Americans needlessly parish during our awful Delta slash BA dot one COVID waves because they fell victims to vaccine disinformation, I want to have that discussion. I’m happy to come on and have a meaningful discussion.

I respect you and your show, and I don’t want an adversarial relationship. I think we can make some progress. Elon Musk jumped in and said of hot says he’s afraid of a public debate because he knows he’s wrong. Hots has responded seriously, Elon, this is monstrous. Andy Kindler, the comedian wrote, unfunny propagandists like Joe Rogan and Jimmy Doer know the countless people have died believing their lives about COVID.

They’re not that stupid, they are that evil. Mark Cubans took some shots at Rogan, saying, way to talk in generalities, Joe not saying there aren’t a lot of fed up things about pharma, but to ignore that the same industry is saved. Who knows how many lives is bs and you know it. It’s also disrespectful to all the doctors, researchers, and medical professionals that dedicate their lives to saving lives. Trying to bully doctor Hotsz’s ridiculous.

You of producers that will prepare you and you get to control the conversation. Kennedy also has a staff ready to prepare him, and these topics are what he talks about in every speech. You both do this on a daily business, while doctor Hotsz works every day trying to find ways to help people. Joe, you and Elon must Twitter are the mainstream online media and your platforms have become everything supposedly wrong with MSM. You’re driven by self interest like the MSM always has been accused of.

You both have earned that right. You’ve busted your asses to be great at what you do and earned all you’ve accomplished. But don’t lie to yourselves and all of us and tell us you’re different. You aren’t. Salon had a really good interview with Roy.

Would Junior I share that in the Facebook group which is Daily Comedy News Podcast group, Please feel highly encouraged to join the group. Roy said, The thing it sucks is you can deny reality, but somehow your vote still matters. So if your vote still matters, then people have to figure out a way to appease you to some degree. That means meeting you in the middle a little bit, even if it’s infuriating and crazy. When you take a company like Target putting Pride Month merch in the back of the store, that’s the middle ground.

That’s because they’re trying to appease people who live in a totally different reality. They’re just trying to sell clothes. The truth is most of these corporations probably don’t care about half the causes they’re selling merch for they now, we’ll just buy it.

And then Roy got in a joke and said, and yeah, it needs to put that in the ba…

Unless it’s black owned, then of course I’ll support the Juneteenth tank top, where he continued, I just think that corporations are in a rock and a hard place. By the way, it’s not like Pride Month. Merch is a new thing, but now all of a sudden, they’re mad. Now the corporations are having to choose. The eventual regression will be corporations not taking any political stances.

Ever, again, most of the stores will become issue neutral. We could say we’re not going to boycott the store, but if all the stores take the same stance, what are you gonna do. You’re gonna make your own toilet tissue, You’re gonna make your own medicine. Last week in Beverly Hills, Howie Mandel, Rachel Bloom, and Michael Rappaport did a show called The Roast of Anti Semitism. The Times of Israel reports there were countless jokes about anti Semitic stereotypes.

More than one performer mocked the idea that the Jews control the weather, noting the auditorium was pretty warm. Howe Mandel closed out the show and he made fun of a woman in the front row for falling asleep during a set, saying, we’ve been persecuted for six thousand years. You can’t sit for an effing hour. The rest of today’s a podcast is going to be about me feeling old, and maybe you guys go and he’s old, doesn’t get it. But I have a feeling a lot of you are with me on this.

Were you aware that the Lost Culturista’s Culture Awards were even happening? Now? If I tell you they happened at Lincoln Center over the weekend, would you be? Because I was, like, what, I’ll remind you. I put this podcast out seven days a week.

I work on it at least five I have news trackers. I type in words like comedian and comedy into Google and I see what comes up. I don’t know if I just clost over this anyway. Apparently the Lost Cultureistas Culture Awards is an annual thing and it’s catching on if it’s at Lincoln Center. It’s hosted by Matt Rodgers and Bowen Yang.

It’s a parody awards show that has graduated from celebrating culture to creating it just two years, writes Vulture. They now stage a massive production, complete with musical numbers and four hour long queues. Gabby was on the line and said those tickets were harder to get than Taylor Swift tickets. A group of ticket holders confirmed there was a waiting room just like Taylor Swift. As the show began, the line to get in still snaked around the block.

One fan said, morales low, capacity is high. I think it’s delusion. Comedian and presenter Charlie Bardi said it’s like we’re gonna do a fun comedy show on Lincoln Center, and then it was like, oh my god, there’s a bajillion people here. Bowen agreed that the show itself is incredibly obtuse. He was interviewed by journalists on an actual red carpet.

Reformers described the show as gay Coachella, a gay football game, the hottest tick at Manhattan, and a backyard production of Pepin And Here are some of the winners and losers of the twenty twenty three Loss Culturista’s Culture Awards, as recap by Vulture. Winners, teachers, artists, and neighbors. Losers Annie’s Mac and Cheese because Kraft Mac and Cheese was a sponsor of the night and the audience was letting a group reading of the famed last clutchad for the product Annie’s Can Go Choke, writes Vulture winner Andy Cohen. He accepted the award for Best Gay Guy Parentheses famous loser the technically Correct Spelling Nineties as an nine zero s in favor of nineties nine zero apostrophees winner LaGuardia Airport, which won three awards and received the video montage sets to Glamorous by Fergie winner Kate Blanchett, who won the Kate Blanchett Award for Good Acting. It sounds like it was fun.

I had no idea somehow. Remember that John Earle’s new special was out on Max, the former HBO Max, although this is an HBO special on HBO on Max, which is not HBO Max. Guy, straight on your branding and go back to HBO Max. This is a very stupid John Early now more than ever, I’m going to have some spoilers for it, and this will be the last topic of the day. So if you’re planning on watching John Early and don’t want me spoiling it, and why don’t you bail now?

Everybody else can hang around for a second. I will give you my general vibe. It left me feeling old. I posted on the Facebook group again Daily Comedy News podcast group. I was watching it.

I’m like, is this awful? Is this amazing? I’m not sure I get it. I was entertained, I was confused, and I usually am pretty hip to the comedy scene. This one had me feeling the gray hairs on my temples there a little bit.

So it’s kind of like a mockumentary of a band. He came out and he did a song I’m not even sure the song was supposed to be funny or not, then told some jokes. Then we go into like a basic band mockumentary documentary behind the scenes where he’s playing himself as a jerk hole. Than they did a cover of a Britney Spears song. Than more stand up comedy, And at one point about forty minutes in, I was like, I just don’t care.

And I watched Cocaine Bear. I know I’m late on this. Oh my god, Cocaine Bear, laugh out loud, funny. I have to add Cocaine Bear to the best of twenty three list. Let me see how high this is it?

Is it better than Kunk on Earth? No? Is it better than Kyle Canaine? No better than Nate? No?

Is it better than Jay McBride. Yeah, all right, look at this slotting in at the number fourth thing of the year. Cocaine Bear. You’ll find it on Peacock highly recommended. Silly fun.

Anyway, back to John Early, The Daily Beast writes, anything less than loud would be a disservice to yourself. You have to hear it Blair through your walls. Without that volume crank, you might miss Early opening a set with a Trump joke somewhat unexpected from a comic contends to be more subtle the joke, and this was actually one of my favorite things of the night. If we look back at the Access Hollywood tapes, not so bad. Trump sounds less predatory in retrospect, maybe a little more like someone who’s terrified of sex.

Best line of the night. I guess it sounded like locker room talk in that it sounded like me at age twelve in the locker room, trying to convince a group of straight guys that I like Lizzie. Then he does that next section. I won’t totally spoil it. Very very funny.

The Daily Beast calls a special unpredictable and has to be seen to be fully appreciated. It shot more like a variety of show and less like a conventional stand up special, with multiple cameras zooming in and out to follow early across the stage. That dynamic range highlights its subject’s physicality. I’d be curious to know what you guys thought of the special. Like I said, it left me feeling confused and old.

It was entertaining. M Does it make the best of twenty three list? It probably does, right below Sarah Silverman. So I’m updating the list as I record the podcast, So generally now at number ten, you want the latest version of list, updated as you listen. All Right, Funniest things at twenty three so far, Kunk on Earth, Kyle Canaine, Napergatzy Cocaine, Bear, Jay McBride, Jim Jefferies, Harry Conabolo, Chris Rock, The Roast of Mister Peanut, Big, Jay Okerson, Sarah Silverman, John Earley, not on the list, Amy Schumer, John Malley, Lewis black Kind against Me, Mark Marin, Andrew Santino, B Craisher, Greg Warren, did not see Rosanne, did not see what’s his name from SNL that had the one on Fox.

You could just look it up and edit this John, you know, but that’s not fun. Guys. Rob Schneider, that’s his name. And while I have Rob Schneider and Google, is there any review of Rob Schneider yet? No?

That’s your comedy news for today. Follow the show for free on Apple Podcasts or Spotify for on YouTube. Smash that light button. Huh see you tomorrow. All right, enough with the negativity.

Hi, I’m Johnny Mack, host of Five Good News Stories. It’s a podcast twice a week. Every episode a curate, five heartwarming, uplifting news stories from around the world, showcasing the best of humanity, tales of kindness, fun animal stories, quirky items in the news, and you know what, more often than not, something about McDonalds. Can’t explain why, I’ll bring you a range of stories that will leave you feeling hopeful and optimistics. Start your day in a positive note the number five good news Stories.

It’ll make you smile. To start your day on a good note. Five good news stories. Wherever you get your podcasts,

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Full Transcript

The Shark Deck johnny Man with your Daily Comedy News, and I lost my script. It’s usually here. Where did you go here? It is? John?

Why don’t you edit that out because that’s not fun. That’s what really happened. From the Valdosta of Daily Times, they spoke to Dan Whitney, you might know him as Larry the Cable Guy. Dan explained coming up through the ranks at the time using Larry the Cable Guy was like a brand, brand that took off in a big way. It was a really crazy thing.

I was just a comedian and all of this was such a whirlwind. I remember when I first met Larry. We had Jeff Foxworthy coming up to Sirius and his publicist was like, hey, you guys want to talk to Larry the Cable Guy. And we were like, we don’t know that it is sure, Yeah, we’ll talk to him. We had no idea, So I think we made friends with Larry about thirty seconds before he really blew up Dan Slash.

Larry is an awesome, awesome dude. If you go down on the feed. He’s one of the few guests that I’ve had on this show over the last few years. A true friend and I always laugh at the interview if you listen back spoiler. I actually had to wrap up the interview because I had to jump on a zoom call for work, and Larry made a joke about how he put my kids through school, and I laughed, and I’m like, it’s pretty much true.

Love that guy. Dan said his management team at the time pushed him to use Larry the Cable Guy name for everything. The team was aggressive if media mentioned his real name and stories about the comedian. Whitney laughed, saying he never had a problem using his real name and doesn’t now, and he wishes he had used his name in the Cars movies, but he’s fine being known as Larry the Cable Guy. He said, I’m a country kid from Nebraska who grew up in Florida and went to school in Georgia.

I’ve lived in Florida for thirty to forty years now, the article points out, and I’ve talked about this in the past. His phone voice is familiar. It sounds close to the voice you expect to hear in a phone interview with Larry the Cable Guy. But it’s not until he starts talking in character that one realizes his real speaking voice has a hint of Southern flavor, but nothing like the dippton kutsue and sweet sea of Larry the Cable Guy. He could turn the voice off and on like water.

I’ve talked about this in the past when I’ve hung out with him. Sometimes you’re talking to Dan and sometimes you’re talking to Larry the Cable Guy, and it’s not like it’s not like he’s the joker like, but sometimes he slips in a Larry the Cable Guy. But when you’re backstage, Dan is usually hanging out. His first gig as a stand up nineteen eighty five and nineteen eighty eight, he quit his day job and again performing full time. Said I love making people laugh.

Will there be another Blue Collar Comedy Tour? And I’ll remind you both Bill Engvall and Ron White retired at the end of last year. But I agree with what Larry says. Here He goes, you’ve got four guys in their sixties and points out he himself has cut back on doing one man shows to spend time with his wife and children. He usually books performances to coincide with golf tournaments.

But as for the Blue Collar Comedy Tour, and I think he’s right here. It’s probably not going to happen, but I could see in another five years or so doing a reunion thing and a casino in Vegas. I agree, there’s money on the table. I could see that happening. The New Yorker spoke to Sarah Silverman about her recent special, and she said, you know, I never think about doing a special.

I never write stand up aiming for a special. I ever think about it. This is my fourth special, and I’ve been doing stand up for thirty three years. I did a pilot for HBO right before the pandemic, and part of that deal was a special, and then they didn’t pick up the pilot, but I still owed them a special.

And then the pandemic happened.

I didn’t know stand up for the longest time.

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And then stand up came back and we get a call from HBO and they’re like, it’s…

Sarah said, I’ve never owed a special like that. Usually I’ll have an hour and someone says, can you do a special? And I go, yeah, right. She does seem bummed that HBO didn’t pick up the pilot, telling the New Yorker, it’s funny because I was really bummed about it. I was like, they need this show.

Was a great pilot, a political half hour weekly. It was like a John Oliver or Bill Maher type show. I was gutted. I was so bummed. When a pilot doesn’t go, you’re always bummed.

I was like, I can’t believe they’re blowing this opportunity the pilot. Of course it didn’t air and none I’ll see it. But two years later, everything we were talking about came to the four. Now it seems trite, but it was about the algorithms of social media that brings us to the Daily Show. Remember she hosted it for a week back in times when there were writers and late night shows were a thing.

The New Yorker asked, have you ever been in conversations to host your own late night show or take over from one of existing hosts. Sarah said no. I had a blast doing it, meaning the Daily Show, But that’s never been something I wanted in my life. I love doing odd jobs. The Daily Show was so exhilarating and such a lesson in immediacy.

You’re sitting with a producer and she’s like, use it or move on. She’s keeping on track. I remember when I hosted SNL. At the after party, I was sitting with Lauren Michaels and Martin Short and Lauren said that Morty was going to do a thing on Update tonight and I was like, oh my god, that would have been incredible. And Lauren said Martin’s promise that he wants everything to be perfect, when the truth is it just has to be good.

And I thought that was so funny. But when I guest hosted The Daily Show, I immediately understood it perfect is the enemy of good. It’s about using what works and making it the best it can be. How does Sarah pick projects? She says, you know, there’s been a couple of things I did for money.

You know, I get this amount of money and hopefully no one will see it. All sorts of variables go into decisions. Doing a rich guy’s daughter’s kinsinia, Yeah, that’s a money get great. I got to do a commercial for Uber Eats that was a godsend. It was awesome.

A small part in a movie I think is awesome. That’s great. I keep my overhead low. I’m not one for purses. Gives me an incredible amount of freedom.

There could be something where I go, Yeah, This looks good, but there were so many crowd scenes and those take too long. I make decisions based on quality of life. Sometimes I say no to stuff because I’m scared or lazy. I’m trying not to do that so much, but I also love being home. She sounds very grounded.

I liked her most recent special, A Lot’s currently number nine on the Best of twenty twenty three list. Salon spoke to David Cross. They were curious how David came up with the name of his tour Worst Daddy in the World, and they said, was there voting? Did your daughter choose it? Cross said, oh, yeah, there was the subcommittee, which is done out of Oslo in Norway, and they meet quarterly and they just go through everything and then five thirty eight has something to do with it.

I know they’re involved, but yeah, I was submitted by my daughter and I went through all the levels you have to go through and then I emerged on top. Can I tell you I’m impressed with how today’s podcast is coming out. I wrote this on Friday. There was absolutely no news and I went into Google and typed in every single comedian I could think of, which is how I went up with the Larry the Cable Guys story and these next two I’m gonna do. This is pretty good.

I’ve shared this before. There’s a story about Tom sever late in his career and the pitching coach comes out and goes, you know you have nothing today, and Sepher goes, yeah, but they don’t know that. And I think if I didn’t tell you that I’m kind of checking and jiving today, I’m not sure you would have noticed. Johnny makes Little prownd to today’s podcast. Lewis Black spoke to the La Times and they said COVID drinking.

Was that a thing? Lewis said, I was pretty good with that. I gave myself like two glasses of wine and I said to my shrink, it’s got me. It’s such worried. And the shrink said, better than lithium.

Glasses of wine are probably better than any of the antidepressants you could take. And it worked. What I did do is I binge watched a lot of TV. And part of the reason I binge watched, beside the distraction level, is the fact that I’ve waited my whole life for tvd be that type of mature and be that smart and have that level of acting, that level of writing. Comedian Ohmed jually caught speeding while desperate for the toilet.

The fifty seven year old comedian was stopped on the edge of Regent’s Park after a copper spotted at him flying along the road and his luxury Lexus. The officers told a magistrate’s court. As soon as I stopped the driver, he said he needed a wee. The officers said. He questioned July to see if he knew at the road I had a twenty mile an hour speed limit, which I’ve never been on all Buddy Street.

But that’s ridiculous. You can’t drive a cart twenty Julius said, I’ve been down here in many years. Speed thirty forty. I must be doing forty five or something. The officer said.

I showed him the speed gun. He was doing forty seven. I informed him that I could see that he was flying towards me. I asked for his driving license, and he asked me to be quick because he needed to go to the toilet. This happened back in November.

Last week, on Tuesday, a magistrate find the comedian six hundred sixty pounds ordered him to pay a two hundred and sixty four pound victim surch George plus one hundred pounds in costs. Yikes, guys, come on, also imposed six penalty points on his license. Julyly was given a two hundred pound fine in March last year for speeding by Gatwick Airport, and received a thirteen hundred pound penalty in twenty thirteen for speeding on the M four. At that time, he joked to the court comedian humbly asking for leniency. In two thousand and eight, he lost his license after racking up more than twelve penalty points.

He got a second man twenty twelve after being caught driving without a valid license or insurance. He said, you should never do jokes in court. The judge said to me, you have thirty six points on your license and another eighteen pending, which takes you up to fifty four, which is uk ricord. We’re gonna ban you from driving for six months. Do you have anything to say?

I said, could you give me a lift to the station, your honor? And the judge said that’s not funny. Did you guys check out my postclode dot com yet? What are you doing? Get over there on my Postclode dot Com and they sponsor Today’s Daily Comedy News.

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Printed on metal will last. Yeah, this isn’t like a piece of paper. You have to deal with a frame metal, nice and easy, hanging on the wall. All right, John, what is this? Well, I’ll tell you.

First step, can answer a couple of questions about your kid and the milestones. So, like, I don’t know, maybe it’s at lea scored three goals in the championship game. Let’s say it’s that. Okay, So you’re gonna ask you a couple of questions and to fill it out. Then schedule your design consultation, You do a virtual meeting, You work on the article in the layout.

You can make some changes, you can personalize it some more. That’s it. Then it shows up. You’re a parent. You know what happens.

You get caught up in the day to day. You lose sight of the progress. You’re like, oh yeah, great. Game three goals. Anyway, we gotta pick up your brother, and no, I gotta work tomorrow and I gotta record the podcast.

You know how it goes. I’m telling you. I preached to my children, remember the good times. You don’t always have an awesome day. When you have an awesome day, celebrate it.

Recognize the hard work that you’ve done. Things don’t just happen. You put the work in. When you get the results, celebrate it. It’s too easy to take success for granted.

Take the time, celebrate, remember, cherish your memories. So I’m looking any examples here. Here’s one a young woman in the pose of about to shoot a basketball and it says Sarah’s buzzer beater victory. There’s a bunch of pictures of the game. One of the team has the date to nineteen twenty twenty three?

Where did this happens? And diego? So you get a custom article made and it comes on metal. How do I place an order of my post glow? John, Well, visit their create a story page on my postglow dot com.

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What’s the offer? John? Ten percent off before the fourth of July. Ten percent off my postcode dot com, personalized story, photos and design, free gift wrapping and shipping my postglow dot com. Do it?

You know I’m stilling over this driving record thing. If you have the record for points, you only get suspended for six months, I think if you have the record lifetime band no, yes, yes? Do you like Rick and Morty? Remember they broke up with Justin Royland. Justin Royland importantly was the voice of Rick and the voice of Morty.

Seems like a big deal. Adult Swim president Michael Olleen was talking to French publication Premiere and said Royland will be replaced in dubbing. Voices are obviously super important in an animated series, and of course none of us wanted to go through what we went through. But I’ve been in animation for a long time, and I know what makes a series is it’s different parts coming together. I’ll jump in like the voices.

If the voices are obviously a big part, there’s also the writing of the characters in their design, he added the new voice act this worries me. He added, the new voice actor would simply not do an impersonation of Royland. I think his reasonab believe the transition will go. Well, here’s the part that worries me. He compared it to Bugs Bunny, which has had many voice actors over the years.

Time out, full, time out. Okay, I’m making a tea and I’m stecking back from the huddle, and I’m talking you directly. You’ve watched Bugs Bunny, the classic ones with mel blank. That’s what Bud’s supposed to sound like. Some of the ones in like the I don’t know, eighties, nineties, not the best Bugs.

It’s like me doing Bugs Bunny. Do you want to hear what that sounds like? You do? What’s up? Doc?

That was terrible? Do you want Rick and Warty to be that bad? Do with justin Royland impression? Don’t tell me the Bugs Bunny being voiced by different people is a good example of this. It’s like Kermit the Frog.

Have you heard some of the terrible Kermits over the years. Stop very worrisome, but the adult swimsuit says, I even think that for Rick and Warty will do even better. It’ll be fine, It’ll be great. Yeah. Yeah.

What we do in the Shadows season five already back on July thirteenth. If you’re not familiar with what we do in the Shadows, where you’ve been, I’ll dump it down. It’s The Office Vampires show documents the nightly exploits of vampire roommates Nandor Lazlow played by the Great Matt Burry, Nacha and Colin Robinson as they navigate the modern world of Staten Island with the help of their human familiar Guillermo. This season, energy vampire Colin Robinson looks to run for political office as Giarmo might finally get his wish and become an actual vampire and true Giarmo fashion, It does not go as smoothly as expected. And that is your comedy news for today.

Follow the show for free on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Smash that like button That’s terrible is that what you want riking Morty to sound like no see you tomorrow? Who does like vacations? Do you need some inspiration for your next road trip? Are you excited to get out there and explore the world again?

Hi, I’m Johnny Mac. My podcast is called Travel is Back. Travel is Back is travel for regular people. We hop in the car with like coach views or miles. We eat at normal places, we stay at normal places.

So what I do is I hop in the car and I grab my portable recorder and I go somewhere. Season three kicks off on a road trip to Key West. You can check out the back catalog. There are popular episodes covered Chicago, Nashville, Vancouver, Seattle, a whole bunch more Travel is Back road trips, or regular people follow a show on Apple podcast or wherever you get your shows. These are quick, these are casual, and it’s for regular people like you.

Travel is Back

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Full Transcript

The Shark Deck Mappy Father’s Day, or as Mets announcer Ralph Kiner once famously said, to all your father’s out there, Happy birthday. I am Johnny Mack with your Daily Comedy News. Jim Gaffigan was on Drew Barrymore’s show like a month ago and told some dad jokes, and your favorite Daily Comedy News podcast host was like, let me save these Forefathers Day or right. Jim Gaffigan said, did you hear the rumor about butter Well, I’m not going to spread it. Jim said, I love dad jokes because the reason dad’s do dad jokes is to make the children unhappy.

The fact that they’re so bad that they annoyed child that brings joy to an older man. Amen Amy Schumer was commenting on al Pachito becoming a father ALA’s eighty three. Amy was also commenting on Robert de Niro seventy nine becoming a new father. Amy said, everyone’s like congrats. If it was Jane Fonda, people would call the police.

It’s weird. It doesn’t make me comfortable. Kevin Hart is opening a new Heart’s House. Remember Kevin is in the Fast Business. Hardhouse features plants forward food including sandwiches, salads, nuggets, fries, tots, and milkshakes.

New location on the campus of USC. If you ever been on the campus, They’ve got like a nice little call it a downtown the area. I recorded to buy me a coffee there about a year ago. Kenny had bought me a coffee and telt me to go to the Green Logo coffee chain. There’s one in this little campus area.

Anyway, They’re opening up a hardhouse thirteen hundred ten square feet, four interior seats at a standing bar. The official personally says the highlight of this location is the sprawling twenty three hundred square foot beautifully lit and landscaped outdoor seating area with forty patio seats featuring a beautiful water fountain. I saw the renderings. Looks beautiful. George Lopez credits the Michael Jordan era Chicago Bulls for his success.

George said, on my first sitcom, it took a lot to figure out the angles for the direction of the show. We wanted to wrap it around my real life. I love the Chicago Bulls. At that time, and their coach Phil Jackson had built their five player strategy called the triangle, and I said, we’re going to do the triangle in comedy. The show was broken down and in me and my mom and my wife, then my work, my mom and my buddy, then the kids.

I worked all that in because I said, we’re gonna do this in triangles. It worked for Phil Jackson with the Bulls and Lakers, and it works for me. The Daily Bee spoke to Julia. Louis Dreyfuss the Best said Elane’s not in the pilot of Seinfeld, but you come in that second episode. What was it like to enter the world is the only female character on the show.

Julia said, well, I never really approached it from the perspective of my gender per se. I wanted to play ball with everybody. I’m not gonna lie. In the beginning, I didn’t have a lot to do in certain episodes, and I’d go to Larry and Jerry multiple times say hey, guys, write me more. I need to be in the show more.

And that’s what I kept doing and they did. The best points out in the Seinfeld episodes where Jerry is working on the sitcom Jerry, they joked that they don’t know how to write for a woman. Julie said, yeah, but you see, they didn’t write for me as a woman. They just wrote for me for this character as supposed to this gender, which I think it’s instructive in a lot of ways from a writing point of view. They asked if they thought Elane evolved, and Julia said, I think she evolved.

I think she got angrier. I mean, you have to wonder why these four characters would always hang out together. They’re constantly bickering, They’re constantly getting into trouble in one way or another and losing money. Apparently, there was an unfilmed script about Alan buying a gun. The network rejected the idea, which led to Larry Charles leaving the show.

They asked what Julia remembered about it, and she said, I remember it didn’t get a lot of laughs. And believe me, I love Larry Charles. Don’t misunderstand that script felt a little dark. It was out of people’s comfort zones, and that’s saying something on that show. As for their finale, I will say, from a purely emotional point of view, it was really a delight to sit there in the courtroom and watch one guest actor after another parade through I mean, it was like we were watching the show.

So that was really fun that aspect of it. But I understood why people were disappointed. First of all expectations ridiculous. But I also understood because we didn’t do too much in it. Once we had been arrested and in court, it was just us sitting there watching one person after another person parade through.

And if you missed it, I think it was last Sunday, definitely last weekend. I brought up as a topic that I saw on the internet. Question for you, is the character of Alan supposed to be hot? We’re not talking about Julie. We’re talking about the character of Alene.

If you missed that episode, go back in the feed. You’ll find that about a week ago. If you have Fox Nation, you could check out Rob Schneider’s new special Woke Up in America, featuring Schneider’s signature comedic take on a variety of topics, including culture wars, living in a woke world, and navigating the nuanced times of identity politics. He’ll also tackle the controversy surrounding the word woman and UFOs, plus making a movie with former President Donald Trump and his own vasectomy saga. Rob Schneider woke up in America today.

Jack Whitehall did a show over in the UK, and apparently people didn’t like it. I Knews called it outdated laddie banter about campness and anal This is safe stuff from a comedian who knows how to please as loyal fans, but not the rest of us. The show promises an exploration of his new found maturity. He’s in a long term relationship, he bought a dog, it is now expecting his first child. His days of drinking, drugs and one night stands are over.

He tells us this show feels like a pivotal moment for me, but real depth never truly emerge.

Meanwhile, The Guardian gave it two stars and said the stand up promises more…

Okay, kind of the same review. Right. While he gets decent comedy out of his girlfriend’s inquisitive TV habits, his engagement with this stuff remains superficial and isolated. Moments only he tries to give us something more about a social anxiety or how we should be celebrating representation. Whenever we see it is the boy finally becoming a man.

Maybe so, but on this evidence he won’t put aside childish things without a struggle. Oh not good. And from Far Out Magazine they have uncovered the Sandler Verse. The Sandler Verse theory points to running gags and returning characters who seem to crop up time and time again throughout Adam Sandler movies. YouTuber Sean Cone has a detailed video explaining some of the examples, like Rob Schneider’s you Can do It, Jeer from The Water Boy appearing again in Little Nikki than Sandler himself says the line in two thousand ones, and the animal the Caddy from Happy Gilmore also appears in Jack and Jill.

The appearance of pro golfer Chubbs Peterson shows up in Little Nikki in two thousand. Some characters have shown up time and time again, including Officer Jack Pugh, Eric Lamonsof, and ten Second Tom. When Adam Sandler was asked if he had like a multiverse team up movie like a Marvel thing, Sandler said, I’d like that. I’d like to get mentally ready for that. That’ll probably happen, and maybe another thirty five years we’re gonna get to that and that he’s your comedy news for today, Happy Father’s Day.

Follow the show for free on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Smash that like button on YouTube see tomorrow. All right, enough with the negativity. Hi, I’m Johnny Mack, host of Five Good News Stories. It’s a podcast twice a week.

Every episode a curate five heartwarming, uplifting news stories from around the world, showcasing the best of humanity, tales of kindness, fun animal stories, quirky items in the news, and you know what, more often than not, something about McDonald’s can’t explain why. I’ll bring you a range of stories that will leave you feeling hopeful and optimistics. Start your day in a positive note. The number five good News Stories. It’ll make you smile to’ll start your day on a good note.

Five Good News Stories. Where do you get your podcasts?

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The Shark Deck. Don’t Johnny Mack with your Daily Comedy News. Kesha seems very bothered that this Jerry Seinfeld guy wouldn’t give her a hug. Back in twenty seventeen, they were on the red carpet of the National Night of Laughter and Song in Washington, DC, Kesha approached Jerry and asked for a hug. Jerry said, n eggs, and then as he walked away and said, I don’t know who that was.

Kesha was reflecting on it and said, you know, when it got pumpy on planes, I’m poppin Seinfeld not be like everything’s okay in the world and watch my buddy. Then I get to the charity event, I got really excited because he brings me peace and love and all things good in the universe.

And then he didn’t hug me in front of the cameras.

It was depressing and hilarious but so sad. It was like the saddest moment of my life. Slightly after that incident, Seinfeld told extra, I don’t know hug. It’s total stranger. I have to meet someone, say hello.

I gotta start somewhere. James Austen Johnson did a show in London. The folks at Turtle didn’t love it. They said James is a brilliant mimic, no doubt about that, but as live show is hugely patchy, with moments of brilliance mixed in with overlong, self indulgent riffs. He describes his work as sexy jazz rather than the hard hitting punch lines of rockstar comics.

His subjects can be very niche, especially for a British audience. If you want ten minutes on Willie Nelson’s nineteen eighties country supergroup The Highwaymen, you’re in the right place. It’s a fairly direct mockery and a lot of people will just have to trust. Those impressions of Chris Christofferson and Waylon Jennings are on point. Bob Dylan might be more recognizable, but another octogenarian target makes it feel like he’s a willfully shunning contemporary relevance.

Even in a world a watch with Trump impressions, his is a standout, especially the way the Sherlotte informer president can’t stick to a script talking and Trump’s eccentric rhythms comes as second nature to Johnson and equips. I could do this for two and a half hours. His Louis c. K is so on point you might worry about sharing a dressing group with him, but the subjects are often esoteric and with no real llergency to hit punchline or wrap up a skit when it’s done, it makes for a surprisingly unsatisfying hour. OUCH Awards.

I was curious how Mark Marin balances his life and stand up on the podcast and acting, and Maren said, I don’t know the weird thing about self employment in general, as everything seems like some part of work because you’ve worked through life that way. I’m trying not to overextend myself. I came up in this game and there were times in your life where you really have to take everything because you’re like, oh, good an opportunity, you have to do it. Mark said, I don’t love to go away from more than a couple of weeks. I’m not the kind of guy that’s going to be in Morocco for six months with the podcast.

That’s probably at least sixty to seventy percent of my social life, talking to strangers on the mics and having kind of a deep conversation that gets me atam myself. It’s just my life. Don l Rawlings is excited to go do some solo shows because he says, when he tours with Chappelle, I do like fifteen minutes, so you get your laugh on, but you don’t get your chance of getting that real personal connection. That’s why I really love the comedy clubs and the small theaters. It’s like up close in your face, and he really gets to connect with the audience, and the audience gets to connect with me.

Amy Schumer opened up about why she is no longer part of the Barbie movie. She had left the project a few years ago when the Trades reported it was due to a scheduling conflict, always a great term in the entertainment industry. Yees, scheduling conflict. No possible way I could do it, scheduling conflict. But Amy has now revealed the real reason.

She said, I can’t wait to see the new movie. I think it looks awesome. I think we said it was scheduling conflicts, but really it was just like creative differences. But there’s a new team behind it and it looks like it’s very feminist and cool. So I will be seeing this movie.

The original Barbie movie would have seen Amy Schumer as Barbie kicked out of Barbie Land for not being perfect enough, only to return to save it once she’s figured out that perfect is being yourself. Ben Roy, you know him from the Growls. He’s got a new stand up special coming out. You can buy it directly from his label, or wait a couple of weeks and see it on YouTube. Starting July eleventh, you can make a premium rental and digital download for ten bucks.

Then on August tenth, it’ll show up on YouTube. Ben Roy wrote much of Hyena during the pandemic. He said, it’s become clear just how fter we are. Our population has made us far too big to move in any one cohesive direction. We’re sort of like the Titanic.

Now our size has made it are too difficult to avoid any one sudden catastrophe. I believe what will happen will now happen. It’s best to just laugh and enjoy what remains. The special is full of rants about the downfall of American society and how letting go maybe our last hope. Jeffrey Asthmus is preparing his debut stand up comedy special, this one called The Only Funny White Man.

He has a trailer on his YouTube page. I was gonna share a clip, but he dropped two f bombs in the first five seconds, and we try to keep it clean here at Daily Comedy News. Not too familiar with Jeffrey Asthmas, but just reading this article, I don’t think this is my style of comedy. Asthmas said, this is the first one percent alpha comedy special ever released. Others have tried, but none have succeeded.

Congratulations on witnessing history. The special will tackle society’s most pressing questions or dog sexy? Do we need democrats? Should every baby be aborted? Can Lutherans enter into heaven?

And why are beta is allowed to live? Smith said this comedy special has clinically proven a cure at low testosterone, premature ejaculation, and most forms of depressions, So why not give it a Watchative A good moment for once in your sorry pathetic life. Jeff Asthmus The Only Funny white Man YouTube. July twentieth, The Guardian wrote about comedians playing festivals. Jacob Holly said there’s two types.

There’s the off your nut nineteen to twenty four year old bucket hap and vape festivals where if you’re not on at the perfect time. You’re screwed because everybody’s either mashed or coming down. Then there are the middle class artsy festivals where the daub comes, kids stress up and parents get a little wasted. Those whole different challenges. At Holly’s first festival, when many of his jokes were about partying, he was confronted with an audience of kids, so he switched to crowd work, and he said the problem was I was trying to do crowd work with nine year olds dressed a shrik.

People aren’t there to be challenged. The execute really well. Are fun where that’s one liners or props, As long as there’s an optimism to it, it really lands. If you try anything that has a bleakness to it and no one’s ready. Sophie Duker said, it’s so much easier to walk out the constant traffic and noise or at levels that would be like a fever dream if it would happen at a normal gig.

People have come to drink cider and escape their lives. You’re just adding to the symphony of enjoyment. And Sophie says the glamor of readily available toilet paperbackstage is a bonus. It’s ruined me for attending festivals as a civilian. Comedian Ben Wasserman recently did a show at a funeral home.

Live after Death is not your typical stand up routine. Wasserman describes it as a mix of chaotic goofs and gags, including bits in which the audience helps them juggle and perform a seance, combined with what he’s called vulnerable moments, during which he calls on audience members to talk about their own experiences with death, loss, and grieving. He says he never pokes fun at how someone died unless it’s some roadrunner while he coyote kind of accident and they’re already laughing at it. And although he calls on audience members during the show, he always respects someone’s desire to not become part of the act. People do know they’re the comedy show, and so they’re open having a little fun being poked with them.

And that is your comedy news for today. Follow the show for free on Apple podcast, Spotify, YouTube. Where do you get your shows? See tomorrow? All right, enough with the negativity.

Hi, I’m Johnny Mack, host of Five Good News Stories. That’s a podcast twice a week. Every episode a curate five heartwarming, uplifting news stories from around the world, showcasing the best of humanity, sales of kindness, fun animal stories, courty items in the news, and you know what, more often than not, something about McDonald’s can’t explain why. I’ll bring you a range of stories that will leave you feeling hopeful and optimistics. Start your day in a positive note.

The number five good news stories. It’ll make you smile to start your day on a good note. Five good news stories. Wherever you get your podcasts

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Full Transcript

The Shark deck shunning Mac with your Daily Comedy News. Hey remember that whole thing with Pete Davidson and the ferry And Pete suggested that they were stoned when they bought the ferry, and I pointed out, that’s not how it works. It’s not like you’re in the East Village and you’re walking down the street and somebody goes, hey, you want to buy a ferry, and you whip out two hundred thousand dollars cash and suddenly you own a ferry because you’re stoned. That’s not how it works. Well, Colin Jost has cleaned this up on Instagram.

Colin wrote, is it worse that I was actually stone called sober when we bought the ferry. Joe suggests that the ferry could be up and running by twenty twenty five, adding we’re excited to prove the non believers wrong. You’re gonna be begging to get on this ferry in two years. And Mark my words told you yesterday about Joscelyn Chia, the Malaysians are trying to sick interpoll on her. She said her joke had been taken out of context when consumed on social media.

I’ve performed this routine hundreds of times and even did a shorter version of it in Singapore. It always cracks the audience up. I wouldn’t have used it again if it didn’t work. She pointed out that roasting or grilling the audience is part of the comedy club culture in New York. That’s not necessarily the case in Asian countries, where routines are more subdued.

Gia points out that American comics in the past have you sensitive topics, including September eleventh, as fodder for their jokes. I could think of one Gilbert Godfrey joke, she said. Americans can appreciate humor that is horsher, edgier, and more in your face, as compared to in Asia, where the stand up comedy scene is still in its early days. You won’t find a lot of edgy comedy in Asia, she told the BBC. I just wish I could have seen the face of the Interpol officer who received this request.

Honestly, if Interropoll does do something about this request and things escalate, can you imagine how famous it’s gonna make me.

Meanwhile, from says dot Com, Singaporean stand up comedian Kumar has apologi…

Kumar, described as a popular comedian, actor, a TV host, released a video on his socials saying I would like to sincerely apologize on behalf of Joscelyn Sheia’s stand up comedy show. I really don’t think people should use stand up comedy as a tool to vent out your anger and hatred. Please learn from this. For Malaysia, we need you for fun, food and leisure and for some of us work. Jocelyn Shea, if you’re watching this, I really think you should seek help because you really have some issues.

Thank you. Maybe all aspiring comedians needs to go to Adam Carol and Jay Leno’s new Comedy Fantasy Camp. They’ve partnered with the producers of Rock and Roll Fantasy Camp to offer Comedy Fantasy Camp, a four day event Hollywood this October. Attendees of all levels, from beginners to advance. We’ll learn techniques, tips and lessons on all different types and aspects of comedy.

The camp is primarily geared towards adults, but is open to all ages. Who’s going to be there, Jay Leno, Adam Carolla, Alonso Bowden, Brad Williams, some writers from Friends, King of Queens, the Goldbergs, a showrunner from one of Tim Allen’s shows, and maybe they shouldn’t invite the chat GPT. Over the four days, attendees will develop their own stand up routines and perform them on stage, as well as participate in mentoring sessions. There’ll be a live comedy show at the Hollywood Improv featuring all the campers who can pitch their own ideas to a panel of experience producers and writers, providing a real world industry experience. Jay Leno said, I look forward to working with this year’s class of Comedy Fantasy Camp attendees in Los Angeles this coming October.

It will be a gas and now let me leave a pregnant pause because I have to totally change my tone of voice and lose this slightly amused lilt reed that I usually use from The New York Times. Nine women have accused Bill Cosby of sexual assault in the Nevada lawsuit on Wednesday that comes less than two months after Nevada changed its statue of limitations for civil cases. The women said in the lawsuit that the assaults took place in Nevada between nineteen seventy nine and nineteen ninety two, some in Cosby’s hotel suite in Las Vegas. They said that Cosby had drugged or attempted to drug each of them before the assaults. Cosby’s spokesperson Andrew Wyatt’s told Variety in a statement, it’s interesting that these look back widows are formulating only in those states where many of mister Cosby’s alleged accusers reside.

It makes all Americans asked the question, who’s funding these alleged accusers and who’s funding these lawmakers. More than sixty women have publicly accused Bill Cosby of sexual misconduct, so it’s a trivia. And they asked a question about Bob’s Burgers, which was amusing to me. It was asking who voices Bob Belcher, And you know I could have argued and said, well, nobody voices Bob Belcher, because there’s no such thing as Bob’s Burgers. Again, for new listeners, I understand that you’ve seen the artwork.

I understand that Joe Buck would read promos for it, but have you ever actually seen Bob’s Burgers? The answers no, have you ever met anyone who’s seen Bob’s Burgers? The answers also no, But I digress. So in theory, who voices Bob Belcher? And I had no idea, And my buddy Glenn was there and he added, and it doesn’t exist exactly, So we got that one wrong.

We hade a nice night at trivia. I’m heading somewhere with this. We were missing the fourth guy on our team. He couldn’t come. Now, he’s usually in charge of the food.

We usually we get pizza or sandwiches or something, but we didn’t have anything, and I didn’t have dinner, and I might have had an extra beverage last night. So when I woke up this morning, you know when you’ve had a couple of non coffee beverages and you need to take the edge off a little bit. So I hit the National Donuts chain. Not only did I get a large iced coffee with caramon milk, I got myself not one, two doughnuts, and then I went for a run. So it’s kind of a net zero.

But you know, sometimes you need to mop up the beverages. And this is my way of getting into buy me a Coffee dot Com slash Daily Comedy News. If you’d like to support the show and you’re like, wow, warts Johnny Mac, He’s probably a little hungry and you know, maybe as a slight headache and could use some caffeine and some sugar, and you’d like to help me out, especially after losing Trivia because of a Bob’s Burger’s question, buy me a coffee dot com slash Daily Comedy News. I tease this next story yesterday. It’s gonna be a lot of me reading.

As I went into it, I thought it was heading somewhere, and by the end of it, I just had an ikey feeling, So buck at your seat belts. Distractify I had the headline why do people hate Amy Schumer? Or Netflix special Emergency Contact is the controversial feminist comedian’s fifth standom special. So it got into some of the reasons somewhere might dislike Amy Schumer, and then I got to this quote other people hate Amy because her her self admitted sexual assaults unquote, and I was like, wait, what. Distractify referred to the twenty fourteen Gloria Awards and they write In her speech about confidence, she shared how she was really into a guy named Matt.

In college. He was the only man who paid her any attention, which made her feel validated and sexy despite not feeling attractive compared to the other women at her college. When he drunk dialed her at eight am, she immediately took the opportunity to show up at his dorm room and have sex with him. I wanted to learn more about this and go to a website that maybe I’m more familiar with. That took me to Vulture.

This from Vulture, May second, twenty fourteen, when they say, read Amy Schumer’s powerful speech about confidence. Okay, they have the transcript there and let me skim it from Amy’s speech. I was getting no male attention, and I’m embarrassed to say it was killing me. But one guy paid me some attention. Matt.

Matt was six feet tall. He was five years older than me. What an older boy attention to me? I must be Okay. I made him laugh in our bile lab, and I could tell a couple of times that we had a vibe.

He was a super senior, which is a sexy way of saying should have graduated but needed an extra year. Again, I’m skimming here. When I would see him on campus. My heart would race and I would smile as he passed. I’d look in the mirror and see all the blood rise to my face.

I’d spend time analyzing the interaction. I’m planning my outfit for the next time I saw him. I wanted him to call. He never called, but then finally he called. It was eight am.

My dorm room phone rang, Amy, what’s up. It’s Matt, come over. Holy, Yes, this is it. I thought he woke up thinking about me. He realized we were meant to start a life together.

Skipping ahead, the door opens. It’s Matt, but not really. He’s there, but not really. His face is kind of distorted, and his eyes seem like he can’t focus on me. He’s actually trying to see me from the side, like a shark.

Hey. He yells too loud and gives me a hug. He’s effing wasted. I’m not the first person he thought of that morning. I’m the last person he called that night.

I wonder how many girls didn’t answer before he got to fat freshman me and I in his phone is Schumer, probably, But I was here and I wanted to be held in touch and felt desired despite everything I wanted to be with him. I imagine into s on campus together, holding hands, proving, look, I’m lovable, this cool other guy likes me. She gips ahead has some very colorful details of what they did in the bed. She eventually says, on his fourth thrust, he gave up and fell asleep on my breast. His head was heavy and his breath was so sour.

I had to turn my head so my eyes didn’t water. So you’ll find that complete speech on Vulture. Separate from what we just talked about, I do want to share that I am aware. Back in twenty eighteen, and you can find this on People. Amy opened up about being sexually assaulted.

Quoting Amy and People, I lost my virginity while I was asleep. So my stand up I used to talk about I called it gray area rape, which is my way of bringing this up in my stand up, trying to make people laugh while they learned. When we hear about rape when we’re children, it’s about a guy popping out from a bush and this villain. They don’t say, it’s probably going to be a guy who you know very well. In my stand up, I would say, if she’s asleep, that’s a no back to distractify, they wrote.

Even still, allegations of joke stealing have run rampant aside in Me’s controversial career. That’s what first led many women to also dislike Amy. Several of those allegations, however, or about Amy’s sketch show, which has a team of writers. In addition, many jokes come from similar premises, so there are often similarities between the jokes and concepts and comedy, which makes joke theft challenging to prove. Regardless of all the reason to hate Amy, there’s still enough love for her to wander at a new Netflix special not your comedy News for Today,

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Full Transcript

The Shark Deck. I’m Johnny mag with your Daily Comedy News. All right. I watched Amy Schumer’s special, and as I shared it in the Facebook group Daily Comedy News podcast group, it was weird to me. It felt like a low energy workout.

If you’re not familiar with the comedy term workout, that’s when you go to a club and you try some new jokes. It felt like a club set. It didn’t feel big. It didn’t feel like a theater special, even though she’s in a theater. And I caught some grief on Facebook.

I kind of Cattley said, I’m sure the seven figure check means she doesn’t care that. I’m not loving it. It’s not bad, it’s just there. I had it on It’s like, okay, but it just did not feel like a big time special. I lasted twelve minutes and then she did a joke where she had a bottle of water and started spilling it.

That was during the part about the blind guy, and I was just kind of like. Travis is a friend of the pod and part of the Daily Comedy News podcast group. He wrote, I watched it. It wasn’t horrible, not a complete wasted time, but also nothing anyone needs to see. I think Travis nailed it just there.

So I said life is too short and I needed to do something else. What did I do? I watched Sarah Silverman’s special that’s on Max, the former HBO Max kind of enjoyed. It wasn’t amazing, but I hung out for an hour and Sarah was consistently entertaining while I also played on my phone. But she had me interested and laughing a few times, So that special’s not bad at all, which leads us to the updated twenty twenty three comedy rankings.

Haven’t done this in a while because I haven’t watched a special in a minute, all right. Currently, the funniest thing of twenty twenty three is Kunk on Earth. You’ll find out on Netflix. You should watch that. But aside from that, for stand up specials, here we go.

Number one Kyle Kinane, that’s on YouTube. Number two Naper Gatsi’s Hello World that’s on Amazon. Jay McBride’s Daddy’s Girl Doing This, Remember I think that’s on YouTube. Jim Jeffrey’s special on Amazon is number four. Hory Conobolus is really good.

That’s on YouTube. Chris Rock, Remember Chris Rock did a live special on Netflix. Is kind of a big deal. That’s number six, Number seven, the Roast of Mister Peanut. I know you’re like, what what kind of podcast is us?

Go on YouTube watch the full, like fifteen minute roast of mister Peanut. It’s pretty good. Big Jayogerson at number eight and a new entry on the list at number nine, Sarah Silverman not on the list, Amy Schumer’s a new special, John Malini’s special, Lewis Black, Hannah Gaspy, Mark Marin, Andrew Santino, Bert Kreisher, and Greg Warren. All Right, so I’m not just throwing anybody with a special on the list. Those are some heavy hitters who will not be on the best of lists.

I also have a category called it did not see Roseanne’s specialism that one. I’m not boycotting it. I just don’t have the Fox Nation service.

Speaking of Amy Schumer a few minutes ago, I didn’t plan this segway well eno…

Amy is not holding back when it comes to celebrities and diet trends. She was on Andy Cohen and they were wondering which celebrities have used oh zempic, that’s the type two diabetes drug for weight loss. Amy said, like a year ago, I tried it and said she was one of those people that felt so sick that she couldn’t play with her son. She telled any Cohen, everybody’s been lying saying, oh, smaller portions like shut the f up, youurono zempic and one of those things where you got work done. Just stop be real with these people.

When I got LiPo, I said, I got LiPo. I have a story for tomorrow’s podcast scheduled. Someone wrote an article under the headline why do people hate Amy Schumer? And as I was researching it, if you want a little tease of what I’m going to get into tomorrow, google Amy Schumer twenty fourteen Gloria Awards. I was quite surprised at what I found and tomorrow show is going to be a little on the PG side, So leave the kids at home.

Maria Bamford will have a new book out on September fifth. It’s called Sure I’ll Join Your Cult, A Memoir of mental illness and the Quest of belong Anywhere. The official description on the book website from Weird a scary and genius stand up comedian Maria Bamford a brutally honest and hilariously frenetic memoir about show business, mental health, and the comfort of rigid systems. From Dale Carnegie’s How to Win Friends and Influence People to Suzuki Violent Training to Richard simmons twelve step Programs with sincerity and transparency. She recounts every anonymous fellowship she’s joined, including but not limited to, debtors, Anonymous, sex and Love Addicts, Anonymous and overeaters, Anonymous Sure I’ll join your cults.

September fifth, from Maria Bamford, Variety announced its annual list of ten comics to watch. These honorees will be celebrated at Just for Laughs in Montreal. Some of the past names Pat Oswaldamis Shumer, Tiffany Hatish, Taylor Thominson, Sam Jay Haas and Minhaj, Nate Brigatsy, Beat Davidson, Roywood Junior. Not too shabby, right, all right, here is the class of twenty twenty three, And if you listen to the podcast every day, a lot of these names are going to be known to you, which is neither here nor there. I just thought it was interesting as I went down a lot of years, I look at the list and I’m like, I don’t know who that is, but this time around, yeah, I’m pretty familiar with a bunch of them all right, in alphabetical order by last name.

Hannah Burner. Berner’s videos, including her viral Hannah on the Street segments, have a mass the nine hundred million views on TikTok Alone Curtis Kunner. He has a popular YouTube channel boasting over four million subscribers. He has filmed his first hour special in Toronto. Zarna Garg was the winner of Kevin Hart’s comedy competition Lift Comics.

Garg has a special out on Amazon called One at Avilion. Ian Lara currently developing a scripted comedy with Chelsea Handler’s production company. His HBO special Romantic Comedy is currently streaming on Max. Joan McNally is the co host of the podcast My Therapist Ghosted Me Leanne Morgan, Yet her name has been coming up a lot recently. Her Netflix special on every Woman premiered in April.

Nimish Petz Hill has written for Saturday Night Live. He self released his special Lucky Lefty, about being diagnosed with testicular cancer. Sarah Sherman seems too famous to me to be on this list. You know Sarah. She’s been on Saturday Night Live for two years.

Brian Simpson host of the podcast BS with Brian Simpson. He has appeared on Netflix’s The Stand Ups and Sabrina Woo. She was a writer on the Disney series Zugi Commahola. You know that’s the new version of Dougie Hawser. She will next be seen in the ensemble comedy joy Ride.

Let’s stop off on Gossip Corner. Chris Rock and Dave Chappelle spotted taking a stroll together in casual style. This from one of the British papers. They were out in Soho, with Dave Chappelle putting his bulging biceps on display and a black tank top. Chapelle also wore tan trousers and white sneakers.

Rock kept it simple in a plain black T shirt, black cargo pants and white Nike sneakers. Chappelle accessorized with sunglasses, necklace and silver bracelet and puffed on a cigarette while walking with his friend Chris Rock. If you like what I do here, you can buy me a coffee and buy me a cooffee dot com slash Daily Comedy News here’s one right now. Oh, I didn’t notice the National Donuts chain has put the word iced on their plastic cup. That’s new.

So what you do is you go to buy me a coffee dot com slash Daily Comedy News. You throw a couple of bucks in the tip show. I will take your money and I’ll go in the morning like I always do, and I’ll go to the National Don’t a chaine. I’ll pick up my large ice cough reading the sticker here four caramel swooll and four skim and I’ll walk over the shelf and they’ll be a tray there and they’ll say John M. Today, I was number of fourteen eighty one.

And I will take it and I will shout you out on the show. So buy meacoffee dot com slash Daily Comedy News from Newsleader dot com. The Rife Effect. How Blue Room Comedy Club has dealt with the Matt Rife mayhem. Lot of hype on Matt Rife right now He’s the It’s comic right now, Newsleader rights.

Like most small to midsize market, Springfield often attracts two types of touring entertainers, up and comers and fading stars. TikTok. Famous comedian Matt Rife is one of the anomalies. He just did four sold out shows at the Blue Room comedy Club that’s part of his one hundred and fifteen date world tour. Apparently, thousands of people are on a waiting list for a recently announced Washington, DC show by Matt Rife.

Wow Newsleader Rights. With just twenty four hours to prepare for the presale, fans from around the world flooded ticketmasters sites for tickets, creating pre sale pandemomium. Many compared to the announcement of Taylor Swift’s Era’s tour hype much are we putting Matt Rife up against Taylor Swift? Yeah? Okay.

The owner of the Blue Room, Chris Rochelle, said it’s sold out within twenty four hours of us announcing he was coming, announced Taylor Swift is coming. It will last twenty four hours. Chris said, it’s a cultural phenomenon. This kid is the faced voice of comedy right now. He’s cracked the code and figured out how to get popular.

Tickets to see Rife at the Blue Room was two hundred and sea Club one for forty bucks. Richie said some fans were willing to pay up to five hundred if he would do anything to come up with a ticket, he declined. Rochelle said multiple people have claimed to have been ripped off by ticket sellers claiming to have rife tickets. One woman said she spent three hundred dollars on a scam. Rochelle said Blue Room doesn’t use outside ticket vendors.

Someone’s trying to sell you a ticket, don’t buy it, all right. This next story I sat on for a few days because I had other things to talk about earlier in the week, and I had it scheduled for today, and then I see an update. Let me tell you the original one. This is from The New York Times a few days back. At the Comedy Seller Manhattan this spring, stand up comedian Joscelyn Chia performed a routine that Sheet included in her sets from more than a year about the historical animosity between Singapore and its neighbor Malaysia.

But when shea and the club posted a clip from her April seventh sets to TikTok and Instagram with some backlash. The eighty nine second video showed the comedian bantering with an audience member who vounces here that he’s Malaysian, and it concluded with Chia making light of the twenty four disappearance of Malaysia Airlines Flight three seventy two, thirty nine people on board. Angry Malaysians flooded the comments sections on Chia’s social media accounts. The comedy seller received four thousand one star reviews on Google almost overnight. TikTok removed a clip of the joke from Che’s account, flagging at his hateful behavior.

Even Singapore’s Minister for Foreign Affairs weighed in, condemning Chia and apologizing for her horrendous comments in a tweet, noting she certainly does not speak for Singaporeans. In this Time’s article, Chia said, I’m in no way canceled in America in any sense of the word. Now people want to come see me. Let’s dive in on the materials, an extended bit. Apparently some history here that I’m under educated on.

In nineteen sixty five, the city state was expelled from Malaysia. She had jokes. But then forty years later we became a first World country, and you guys in Malaysia, what are you now? Still a developing country? Aw She then likens the nineteen sixty five scenario to a breakup.

She imagines Malaysia trying to woosing a poor back and explaining that hasn’t visited recently because my airplanes cannot fly. Then she added to laughter, what Malaysian Airlines going missing? Not funny. Following the backlash, she removed the clip at the comedy seller’s request. Hmm, that’s interesting.

Comedy seller then reposted it’s to TikTok without the club’s logo. That’s when TikTok removed it. She said, I don’t want the haters to think they’d won and got me to back down. Audience as the comedy sellers see the best comedians and they love it, so how can I be embarrassed by it? Fast forward to Wednesday from the Guardian, Malaysian police we’ll seek Interpol’s help to track down a US based comedian who mocked the country and joked about the missing Asia Airlines flight MH three seventy.

Don’t skim over that. Malaysian police will seek Interpol’s help. What Jocelyn Chia will be investigated under the country’s laws relating to insulting speech and defensive or obscene online content. The police chief was quoted as saying the police would ask Interpol for assistance in finding out her full identity and whereabouts. The BBC adds that Interpol can issue a red notice, you know, like the Netflix movie, asking law enforcement in member countries to locate and provisionally arrest those who are facing either criminal prosecution or a jail term before they’re extradited.

You’re curious. Malaysia and the US have an extradition treaty. Wow. That’s your comedy news for today. Follow the show for free on Apple Podcasts or Spotify or YouTube, wherever you get your shows.

See you tomorrow.

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Full Transcript

The Shark Deck Johnny Mack with your Daily Comedy News downloads up this week. If you’re a new listener, welcome and thank you. Mark Marin spoke to Awards Radar dot Com and they talked about his recent special, From Bleak to Dark. That special was about the death of Mark’s girlfriend Lynn Shelton. Awards Radar dot Com said it feels weird to say because the nature of the stand up, but I enjoyed From Bleak to Dark, and Marin fielded that perfectly.

He said, I wanted people to enjoy it. It’s not weird to say. What’s the alternative to people say it’s terrible and really made me sad. They asked Mark if having the special on HBO is supposed to say Netflix made it special. Marin said, it really did.

Actually, despite what anybody says, I think the Netflix model has done more damage than good in terms of quality and stand up in a way that there are many things on there that you can’t find. I did two or three specials for Netflix within a week. It becomes difficult to find something on that platform. Whatever the algorithm honors is who gets the big cash and who’s put in a position to do more and more specials. In a matter of the quality HBO and I was coming up was not unlike a Letterman slot.

It was really the Holy Grail. It meant something and I was so honored in some weird way. It’s almost like a childhood bucket list to do things like an HBO special.

And also it’s a better place to be.

I got tremendous support from HBO, and they curate their content and there were great shows on there. It sounds like you didn’t enjoy his relationship with Netflix. Marin said, I think most of my audience are people who would engage with what I do, or HBO viewers. So for a number of reasons, it was a tremendously exciting thing to have an HBO hour. Which one of us is going to tell Marin about the whole Max thing.

With Netflix, you don’t even know what’s on there, But HBO is a brand does maintain its integrity to a degree.

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Speaking of Netflix specials, Amy Schumer’s is out.

I have not watched it yet, maybe tonight. I did watch the first two episodes of season sixteen of It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia. Fantastic, really enjoyable. Some LLL’s from Johnny Max sitting in the basement on the big screen. It occurred to me as I was driving to the National Donuts chain this morning.

Remember yesterday I said it was weird that Netflix had put the clip out of the special just the day before. Then I thought about it more as I was listening back to myself, Do you do that because you have a huge ego? No, I do that for quality control. Every now and then I make a mistake and I try and catch it before y’all catch it, make it quick, edit and repost the show. Anyway, it occurred to me that I didn’t see any reviews of Amy Schumer special day of which suggests that screeners didn’t go out And that makes me curious because usually when they’re excited about something, they put it in front of everybody.

For example, Paramount Plus is very excited about the upcoming season of Star Trek Strange New Worlds, and I’ve only seen great reviews for that. But I didn’t see anything about Amy in advance, and that’s weird. Anyway, it’s out now, so USA Today watched it and said Amy Schumer isn’t here to make friends in her Netflix special. I guess I should put out a spoiler’s warning here. USA Today rights spoilers in emergency contact.

The comic declares her liposection to be the laziest thing she’s ever done. She makes fun of herself for stuffing her face with fillers and turning into a laser treatment that render her skin blood red, only to look exactly the same. But and we’ll see this in a couple of reviews. It seems people really like the section about Alec and Hilaria Baldwin. Amy says, do you guys know who Hilaria Baldwin is?

I’m saying it wrong, I’m sorry, then says the woman’s name in any Spanish accent. Amy tells a story about meeting Hilaria backstage at SNL and Hilaria says she’s from Espania with a very thick Spanish accent. Amy continues, they have a von trop amount of children, and they’ve named them all I’m not sure, but very Spanish names like Hammone, Croquetta, and Flamenco. That’s a good joke, and all this would be fine and beautiful except that Hilaria from Espania is actually Hillary from Boston. This woman is in no way Spanish.

Her parents are not from Spain. No one in her life is from Spain. You’re going, what did you just think? I was doing a really racist Spanish impression. So I’m not trying to bully a sociopath.

I have a point, Okay. I think what happened is she went to Spain, and I’ve been lucky enough to go to Spain. Some of you been it’s great, right, don’t you love it? I loved it too, But Hillary from Boston loved it. Now USA Today goes out of their way to point out Hilaria born Hilary Thomas apologized in February twenty twenty one on Instagram for lack of transparency about her upbringing and giving the impressions she was Spanish.

I had no idea about any of this. This is hilarious, Amy says. My point is that all evidence points to this woman ever since she met her husband as straight up pretended to me from Spain and her husband shot someone. Shooting someone’s not funny, Johnny Mack, But the joke is funny. It’s a comedy podcast.

You understand comedy. It was a good joke. Variety also focused in on the Hillaria from spain part Amy says, my point is that neither of them give an f Amy then talked about the joke she was not allowed to make during the Oscars. Amy says, I want to preface these Oscar jokes by saying that my lawyer said not to say these. Don’t tell anybody, don’t get mad at me.

Don’t look up as the name of a movie, more like, don’t look down the barrel of Alec Baldwin’s shotgun. That is a hack joke. Amy, Wow, that’s not good. That should be cut for being terrible. Hack hack hack hack hack.

The Daily Beast right Samy, Schumer mocks the idea that it’s dangerous to be a comedian right now. Amy jokes, when they ask me, I’m like, yes, I’m on the front lines every night. My people are like me, We’re tired. Nobody’s tackling anybody. We’re all too tired.

The Daily Beasts take Emergency Contact is a mixed bag. One minute, Schumer is invoking and honestly kind of riffing on Chappelle, and moments later she’ll delivery skating punchline about our healthcare systems utter lack of interest in conditions that affect only women. Schumer’s brash charisma shines through each knowing grin and comical palt like the one she puts on as she mimics a man who doesn’t want to swallow a pill. Similarly to John Mulaney, who opened his most recent Netflix special by picking out a young audience member blah blah blah, Schumer selects a twenty seven year old named the Libby, who shall occasionally tease with the horrors of aging. At the same time, some of Schumer’s material can feel dated, either the spiritually or is a cultural reference.

For instance, viewers arrived at the Chapelle discussion through a story about Schumer’s visit to the home of a secret blind millionaire, meaning he’s blind, but as somebody explains Schumer, everyone around him acts like it’s not happening. I’m like, you can be that rich that you’re just not blind. Unsurprisingly, the best material and emergency contact is all personal, like when Schumer jokingly compares herself to Libby, perhaps as an analog for her younger self. In those moments she’s undeniable, it’s hard to fathom why she’d waste precious time on anything else interesting. Maybe I’ll watch that tonight.

Pete Davidson has shocked fans after making a surprise appearance in the latest viral video from Mister Beasts This from the Sun. Do you know? Mister Beast YouTuber known for his philanthropy, often giving thousands of dollars away to his fans and strangers. He has more than one hundred and fifty million subscribers on YouTube and over forty billion views. In a recent video of mister Beast decided to document he and his friends living for day on yachts of various worth, starting at just one dollar and going up increments to one billion dollars.

One of the yachts was worth fifty million. The magaship is two hundred feet long, four stories high, can hold over two hundred people, and comes up with a twenty person crew, apparently Pete Davidson’s. In this video, another yacht pulls up, Mister Beast tries to wave a friendly hello. One of the partiers on the other yacht mooned Pete Davidson and pals. Mister Pete said, I was waving and him and he showed me his butt.

Pete said, that’s going to be someone’s dad one day. Eventually the to me boats slowed down to create some distance. Beat said, where are they going? Are they backing away from us? Are we just that good?

Hank Azaria spoke to NPR’s code Switch about the whole ap poo thing, and he said, I think that’s a good example of how a really uncomfortable conversation could turn into a really productive one. He said, if he had any doubts about a poo being problematic, a racist attack and a store clerk where the assailants held up who changed his mind? He said, a pooh had become a slur. Now. Azaria doesn’t voice any non white characters on The Simpsons at all.

He said, there’s no public outcry over the other characters he dropped, and they weren’t considered stereotypical or harmful in any way. But I realized, if nothing else, why am I taking the job away from an actor of color with so much less opportunity than I have. Paul A Poundstone was on the Laugh last podcast. She talked about her own podcast and said, quite correctly, the podcasting world is very much like the economy as a whole. There’s the one percent and then there’s the rest of us.

Who are wrestling with whether or not we should still be doing it. Paula says, I fall into the latter category. Sadly, nice story here with some good coming from some bad. A Canadian comedy grant has been established in the memory of the late Nick Nemeroff. The Academy of Canadian Cinema and Television announced the creation of Misdirect the Nick Nemerov Comedy Grant.

It would be awarded to emerging Canadian comedians who embodied the spirit of his namesake. I wasn’t hip to Nick’s comedy until he passed away, and I’ve been playing in a lot on my show on Live One, which is called the Weekly Comedy Thing. He was fantastic. The grant seeks to nurturally amplify the next generation of comedic voices by providing a cash prize of up to ten thousand dollars Canadian to the winning comedian, intended to be utilized for their next TV special, album or other comedy related project. Lewis Calabro, VP of Programming and Awards for the Canadian Academy, said Nick Nemeroff was a groundbreaking comedian on the precipice of greatness and that’s our hope that this grant will serve as a sign of encouragement and reinforcement for the next generation of innovative, fresh and creative Canadian comedians were pushing boundaries.

Nick’s parents said Nick’s comedic legacy as one of perseverance, commitment, and generosity that will forever be grieving his passing. We are credibly proud to honor his qualities through this grant, providing up and coming comics a chance to pursue their dream with the same fever Nick was known for. Nick passed away June twenty seventh of last year, age thirty two. The Only Times wrote another article about the Austin comedy scene. I shared one of those with you on yesterday’s podcast.

Today, they spoke to specific comedians and club owners. David Lucas, you know him headlining the LA comedy scene these days. He said, the thing that I love about the Austin comedy scene right now is that there are no agencies or studios out there. Well, if you keep writing articles in the La Times, give it five minutes, buddy, they’re gonna be all over you guys. Lucas said, My focus ain’t checking and Chivy to be seen by Netflix or HBO.

It’s pure comedy. I’m gonna get a place where it’s pure comedy. You get to see some of the best stuff. David, Yeah, sure. But I imagine if I tell you, hey, somebody on the back is from Netflix and they’re considering you for special suddenly you’ll be like, Oh, I love Netflix.

Come on, you’re all in it for the money. I’m in it for the money. I’m not recording a podcast as a board stop. Dean Stanfield, comedian said Austin was more free to say anything you want from a comedy perspective, but these days it’s bottlednet. Used to be you could get away with saying anything because there’s nothing to lose.

No one’s careers were on the line. But now there’s more people coming in, so there’s more pressure. Like, you say something wrong, what was the start of your career could end just as easily. It’s still a lot more free than LA’s comedy scene, I think. David Lucas said, the comedy Mothership is changing the game.

That’s Joe Rogan’s club. Never in the world as a comedy club been made by a comedian taking suggestions from comedians and been built four comedians. The Comedy Mothership even offers comedians healthcare. Joe Rogan made this club so the comedians can work in town and pay their rent and take care of their business. When you start working at the Comedy Mothership, it’s like, damn, is this what fairness looks like.

Taylor Dowdy, is the GM of the Velveta Room and also a comedian, said, as a comic, I think somebody like Rogan opening Mothership is kind of a blessing. What else could he ask for? Really? You always heard legendary stories of the Comedy Store. But who’s got the time and money to fly out to LA and try to get on stage there?

It’s nearly impossible. Now in Austin, it’s basically right down the street. Brian Redband, comedian and co owner of the Sunset Strip Comedy Club. I liked that name a lot, he said. After I invested in Sunset, I realized, Oh, I gotta tell Rogan about this.

I’m opening a club right next to him. I still work for Joe full time, and this is probably a bad idea. Maybe I could get fired for this, but I kind of fell into it because I love the other owners in the comedy club. They made the fact that it was a historic building. It just screams classic comedy club.

It’s like a playground for comics. I’m sure it was really uncomfortable to tell Joe I got really drunk at his club. He’s a bar called Mitsy’s, named after Mitsy. Sure. I was hanging out with him on the opening night the Mothership and I said, hey, Joe, I got something to tell you, so glad I was drunk When I told him.

His reaction was like, are you evan kidding? That’s awesome?

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And now we joke about it all the time, me and Rogan.

We’re not doing this for the money, right yea meat either just recorded podcasts supporting the basement. I’m sure some other club owners are, but I don’t give a crap about money. I did this more as an investment in a comedy into the city. We’ve talked so many people in the living here. This is the best place to live.

Now we’re just blowing it up. Comedian bach Zoom and Eguly said, I personally don’t see the growth of the Austin comedy scene as a bad thing, especially because Caps City Comedy Club is not the only gatekeeper anymore. Before as a comedian, if you had a beef with Caps City, then you weren’t doing Moontower Comedy Festival, which the club is affiliated with. And when south By Southwest came up with his own comedy conference, he had to pick either Moodtower or south By. As a comic, he couldn’t perform it both.

So, coming out of the pandemic, if a booming scene where you have a lot of new people running things, So comedians took it upon themselves and run their own shows. The industry here is now run by comics and there’s more stage time for everybody. It’s like a big high school, but at least it’s decentralized. And as we learned today, nobody’s doing this for the money. No one, me neither.

So you know what, don’t follow the show, don’t download it, don’t follow me on Apple, don’t follow Spotify. If you’re on YouTube, don’t smash the like button. We’re all just in this for the fun and the love of comedy. Nobody’s trying to make a buck. Really, see you tomorrow.

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Full Transcript

The Shark Deck Johnny Mack with your Daily Comedy News. Amy Schumer’s specials out on Netflix today now a little strange. On Monday, Netflix released a clip which is kind of tight to airtime. I don’t know what to make of that. Part of me is wondering if they find there’s no buzz on Amy’s special, maybe they have social media and metrics that’s showing that.

I just don’t know why you do it. The day before her special is called Amy Schumer Emergency Contact all right, So when the clips, she tells her husband she has no idea what name to put on the emergency contact form. Get it. She calls Jennifer Lawrence, who gives her the cold shoulder. I guess maybe here we’re just showing off that Amy’s famous friends.

I think that’s what we’re doing here. Lawrence says, we were like barely friends ten years ago. How’d you get this number? I don’t want to get back? And such, good luck with your health issue.

Then she calls Chris Rock and these are all video calls too, because you know that’s what everybody does. Everybody facetimes. Nobody uses the phone, is phone or text? Right? Did you do FaceTime?

We hear from Chris Rock next. Let’s listen, all right, I’m Chris Rock. Yeah, I wanted to ask you if I could list you as my emergency contact. Absolutely, really, you should call me if anything goals Rock, Like Harvey kite Tell and Pulp Fiction, people are going to be rooting for your death. Amy hangs up on Rock and then connects with Judd Apatau, who’s very eager to be the one to pull the plug on her.

Sam Rockwell says he’ll get back to her after she asked him to raise her husband and child in the event of her death. Other famous friends showing off here Selenaomanz, Larry david want To, Pykes, Michael Cha, Michael Sarah, a toddler, and a Chihuahua. Emergency contact with Shout at the Orpheum Theater in La. It’s Amy’s third Netflix special. You will find it on your Netflix today.

Meanwhile, Amy told people she thinks Pete Davidson’s career might have been a train wreck without her. This is a little tongue in cheek, Amy said, I do take full credit for Pete Davidson’s success. Pete had a role in in Amy’s twenty fifteen movie train Wreck, Pete played a patient of Bill Hayter’s hater liked Pete’s before want so much that Hayter recommended him to Saturday Night Live. Amy said he was one of those He was like nineteen or eighteen or something, and absolutely I was like, this kid’s going to be a star. She said she had the same premonition about Michael Chay like, I was like, you meet these people and they’re just living far out in Queens, sharing a room with having lots of roommates.

You’re like, okay, but you’re gonna be big some day. Pete Davidson previously has given Amy Schumer credit. He told Kevin Hart recently, I got very lucky. I was doing stand up for like three four years in the city and I met Amy Schumer and she let me open for her on the road for a little bit, and she was like, I’m doing this movie train Wreck, I’ll see if I can get you a partner. Pete Matt Hayter and appletown while doing his cameo, and then I got home the next day my agent called me and said Bill Hayter recommended you for SNL, And I was like, why that f would he do that.

I was terrified. Pete didn’t think it’d be a fit for the show because I don’t really do characters or anything like that. So I guess maybe I could be a writer or something. Pete was on SNL for eight seasons. He said, I figured, since I’m a stand up, I’ll just try my stand up in personal bits on weekend updates myself, and I’m glad I did.

Pete Davidson is one of the stars of the new Transformers movie. He’s Mirage. Stephen Cable Junior is the director of the movie and said Mirage was always going to be a cocky, wise cracker. I wanted Mirage to do the comedic tone I was diving into here, and Pete really delivered. He talked about a naughty line from the movie, slightish spoiler coming up and some naughtiness.

If you’re listening with the kids today, maybe it pause. The original line for Mirage was work friends. After all we’ve been through. Cable says that was cute, but Pete was giving it all these other reactions, and Pete being Pete, he throughout the line work friends, but you’ve been inside me and we just cried laughing. That was it.

That’s the line. I’ll be honest. There were moments where the student didn’t want to keep that joke in the movie, but we screened it and that line got the loudest laugh in the theater. We’re like, we gotta keep it now. If we hadn’t screened it, that joke probably would have been cut.

Pete attended the premiere of Transformers last week. What did he wear? An electric blue Vilord track suit spray painted with a rudimentary image of an autobot character. The complete sweatsuit, made by La Brand Polite Worldwide, retails on around eight hundred dollars. When Twitter user said, you know you’re rich when you go out and what’s suit to a public event?

And the big news of the day, Jerry Seinfeld and Jim Gaffigan are touring together a four arena tour, both of them one bill pretty good. You want to know the dates? I’m sure you do. November third, Chase Center, San Francisco, the next day at the Kia Forem in La Friday November tenth in Chicago, Saturday November eleventh in Saint Louis. I gotta imagine if they’re doing four, they’re gonna do a lot more right, they’re gonna sell out.

Deadline says there’s no details on which comedian will go first or if they’ll tread slots, so all right on paper. Sorry, Jim’s got open for Cherry. Jim, you’re gonna be in the Comedy Hall of Fame, but Jerry’s going to be in the elite wing of the Comedy Hall of Fame. Great show. I would highly recommend anybody if you can go see Gaffigan and Seinfeld one night.

Yeah, you absolutely got to do that. Even having seen Chris Rock and Jerry Seinfeld on back to back nights in the same exact theater, I wouldn’t want to follow Jerry Seinfeld. I think Jim Gaffigan should just kiss the ring, go first and do a long set, and then go hang out in the back and drink coffee or beer or whatever you do, and just let Jerry close the night. I’m thinking back Sammy Hagar and David Lye Roth toured together in the early two thousands. I think it was they would flip flop every night who would go last, But like same thing, and I’m a big Van Halen fan, I would think Dave should go second.

There but they would trade back and forth. Seinfeld said, Jim and I met doing comedians and cars getting coffee, and I’ve been talking about doing this for years. We finally made the schedules workout. Can’t wait. Jim Gaffigan said, I’m so excited to help out this unknown, up and coming comedian, maybe never heard of.

I know it’ll be an amazing bunch of shows. Rob Schneider is getting a new special, this one on Fox Nation. They’re all in a comedy. Now. Remember they did the Rosanne one and they did one other, right, what was the other one?

I can’t remember. Rob Schneider woke up in America June eighteenth, Hey, that’s this weekend. Rob Schneider woke up in America, filmed in front of a live audience. Well, yeah, so of course it’s a live one, and so the Tampa Theater in Tampa. Hey, John, Hey, pre read the copy, John b.

Whoever wrote the copy, write better copy. Rob Schneider will weigh in on the culture wars and wokeness. No way, he really on a Fox sped all right, shut up. The UFOs filming a movie with Donald Trump and other topics. Ricky Gervaise was on Twitter, he quoted a tweet that said Ricky Gervais is a massively increasing security for his upcoming tour after death threats over his anti woke gags.

Ricky wrote, one, have an increased security. Two my tour started a year ago. Three haven’t add any death threats. Apart from that, this story spot on good article in the l eight Times titled hell LA helped detonate the explosion of the Austin comedy scene. Yes, this comes back to Joe Rogan.

Bert Kreischer said, not only have a lot of people moved down there are comics from LA are calling in avails there. They’re just going to Austin to do two or three spots during the week. Rogan’s created the comedy store down there. It’s really impressive. David Lucas quotes a major name in the LA stand up scene unquote started headlining less than a year ago.

Really, David Lucas, major name started headlining less than a year ago. Let’s look up David Lucas. All right. David Lucas’s website says David Lucas is known for his appearances on kil Tony’s a regular and for performing with comics like Joe Rogan, Luis c Ka, and Tony Hinchcliff. Okay, I haven’t been in LA in a year, and I haven’t been in an LA comedy club in over a year, so perhaps David Lucas is a major name in the LA stand up scene.

Anyway. He started headlining less than a year ago and is steadily selling out venues around the country. After building his fan base in Austin. A regular roastmaster on Kill Tony, which is a fantastic podcast. You should listen to it, Lucas is getting a savage humor viewed by millions on YouTube every week.

Lucas, a former door guy at the Comedy Store, says the Austin fans, who weren’t used to LA’s caliber of comedy immediately showed him love. Lucas said, my first impression of Austin was that these mfers ain’t seen stuff. It was like getting a virgin woman. So whatever they see is amazing, he said. He sold out three shows in January of twenty twenty one, despite the pandemic.

I was like, why I expected at fifty people there. Sure, Austin had a comedy scene, but they had never had a comedy scene like what we got. A major shift began in April of twenty one when the owners of the closed New York Creek in the Cave reopened in Austin. I remember that, and that was it just seemed bizarre. It was like the comedy equivalent of the Dodgers moving to Brooklyn.

I guess, and it worked the only time, says It became the hangout for Austin comics, who gather in a back outdoor section that has a stage as well as picnic tables and food trucks. The club has been known to take risks and programming unconventional shows like Bananaphone, where comics get one minute to perform before getting heckled by the crowd and the hosts. Austin has had an influx of LA comics, many of whom were trying to escape what they deemed as a politically correct coastal audience in LA. With this influx came a political shift from liberal to libertarian. Austin comedi and Chris Hill said personally, I’m tired of the trans jokes.

Can we get another topic please? You can be edging about other things too. A lot of it is hate speech. Mast’s comedy comedian Ariel Isaac Norman said, I know people are complaining a lot about the California people coming here, but our city’s becoming hotter. So you win some, you lose some.

What are you gonna do? That’s your comedy news for today. Follow the show for free on Apple podcasts or Spotify for on YouTube, smash that like button? Will you see tomorrow? All right?

Enough with the negativity. Hi, I’m Johnny Mack. Most of Five Good News Stories. It’s a podcast twice a week. Every episode a curate five heartwarming, uplifting news stories from around the world, showcasing the best of humanity, sales of kindness, fun animal stories, quirky items in the news, and you know what, more often than not, something about McDonald’s.

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The Shark Deck. I’m Jenny mac with your Daily Comedy News. I love this first one. Karen Morgan talked about some of the differences between Generation Z, Millennials, Generation X, and boomers in her latest stand up, but some people from gen Z get kind of sicks off at her. Morgan said, gen Z doesn’t how to write a check, they don’t know how to address an envelope, they don’t how to read cursive, they don’t how to read a paper map.

They can’t get anywhere unless there’s a GPS app on their phone. All I’m saying is, if gen Z takes over the world, it’s gonna be pretty easy to get it back, all right. Not the most clever material, not the most scathing material, but people did not react well. Content creator maxim Batty posted a response to morgan set that was viewed over ten million times. Maxim Batty said, bank transfers and emails are both faster than offline versions, and we’re trying to save the turtles by less paper waste.

Why are you people laughing. You’re a mother, You’re supposed to teach us these things. It’s your fault we don’t know it, and you’re laughing. At us all righty. Some gen Zers defended themselves in the comments.

One said probably asked her kids to set up her phone? Who seeing who? Another another comments could she even open a pdf? Or? How about this one?

Bro? Can she take a screenshot? Who? You gen Zers? And you’re hecklers?

Wow? Ouch? Here’s one more? Okay, change the TV from HDMI? Want to HDMI too?

Whoo yo, gen Z, relax, these are vicious. Gen Z’s not gonna do well. In Roast battle Man, a TikToker named Nicole made her own video saying boomers don’t know how to draft an email, or pay their bill online or save a pdf. That’s a lot of bold talk coming from somebody who probably still lists typing as a skill on their resume. Hey, we’re on LinkedIn.

We don’t have resumes. Creator Shamar Alien asked, well, do you know a hunt for your own food or churn butter? Why are you so scared to move on with the times? Are you still making your own food on an open fire outside because you refuse to use a stove? Is it too modern for you?

Who needs to know how to balance a checkbook? Boyen Morgan’s going to tick everybody off. She says of the silent generation, those born between nineteen twenty and forty, they’re scared of the microwave. She took a shot at the boomers, saying they perfected smoking and that everybody’s mad at millennials for avocado toast. Her summary, here’s all you need to know about gen X.

We don’t care. Oh that’s fun. I mentioned recently that I love The Wrath of Khan. Well, a new podcast I’m excited about, except for maybe one point. The Novelizers.

It’s a new podcast series that tests comedy writers to write chapters in a novelization of a movie. Season one takes on Star Trek to the Wrath of Khan. Well, that’s pretty cool. That’s in your wheehouse, John, Why are you not that excited about it? Andy Richter, who sit and I mean going back to honestly, was it N two when the Late Night shuffles happened and Andy Richter was Conan’s sidekick and Conan kind of took off after Andy left, and then Conan the Night Show and brought Andy Beck and that didn’t work out, and I don’t know.

Richter says The Novelizers is by far the best popular film turned into a novel, and then turned it into an audio play podcast that I’ve ever hosted. The Wrath of Khan is a perfect subject for the first season of the Novelizers because it is well loved, indelibly imprinted on our collective consciousness, and also deeply silly and ripe for comedy. Each episode includes two chapters from the movie, with each adapting a key scene, each one written by a different writer. Each chapter has a different narrator. The first is narrated by Christina Chung, who plays a descendant of Connunian sing on Star Trek Strange New Worlds.

Don’t start me on that one. I could do two hours on my Star Trek podcast that I haven’t created yet. Why that was a terrible idea. The character is fantastic, except the character is Khan’s niece for some reason. Look, I already went into the Die tribe.

You don’t care. The second chapter from the first episode narrated by h John Benjamin us known for something called Bob’s Burgers. Yeah, all right, so this is part of the Bob’s Burgers conspiracy. John, what are you talking about? Two questions for you, dear listener.

First, have you ever actually seen Bob’s Burgers. You haven’t. Second, have you ever met anyone who’s seen bobs Burgers? You haven’t. I know there’s merch, I know there’s promos.

I know you hear Joe Buck talking about it during football games, But have you ever actually watched Bob’s Burgers? No? John Benjamin Off is part of the hoax and h John Benjamin also the star of the really terrible Star Trek short Trek The Trouble with Edward Again. I might have to start a Star Trek podcast and just go off in this stuff. You don’t care.

Other narrators Felicia Day, Wayne Brady, and Patton Oswalt. That’s pretty cool. Each episode features fake behind the scenes interviews by Kevin Carter, including ones with the Slug Consultant and William Shatner’s Body Double Season one ten episodes. I think two episodes were already available when I grabbed it on my app. Hey, if you’re missing late night well SETH Meyers and John Oliver will tour together.

They’ll play New York City’s Beacon Feeder on August seventeenth. John Oliver’s TV show has been off the air since April thirtieth, seth Meyers his last at a new episode on May first, starting to see a lot of press for John Earle’s upcoming special that’ll be out on Max they former HBO Max. On June seventeenth, The Cut did a pretty lengthy profile with John Early and saying John is best known from Search Party, which brought him enough stability to buy a house, but not to become a household name, and a bunch of near misses. A Hulu series which he worked on for years, which came to nothing. A John and Cap Berlant web series five five five was a weird, wonderful cult hits but only available on Vimeo.

Now Here, he comes with the full force of HBO behind him, an amplified queer voice. Amplified Early said, I’ve been in the shower and found myself defending the special that hasn’t come out. I’ve completely fabricated tweets of fake people who don’t exist, who have problems with certain elements in my special. I’ve been in a constant dialogue with them. The Cut rights the imaginary critics will find plenty to debate.

The special now, more than ever, leads into a vicious anthropology of millennial Moore’s Early is at his best, a comedian of manners whose particular bugbears are cliche, one being I don’t know how to do my taxes, but I do know how to be a badass. Time and again, Early interrupts himself to break in a song accompanied by a bandoned pair of backup singers. Early lunches and it covers including tweets, Oops, Britney Spears, Overprotected, and the Dolly parton Linda Ronstadt Emmy Lou Harris. After the gold Rush, Early says, this is the first time I kind of funny let myself just be a cabaret artist, which is secretly what I’ve always wanted to do. On some level, I do think the sum total of it is the closest to my actual personality, which is part of why I was so terrified to do this now more than ever.

On Max June seventeenth, Today’s Daily Comedy News, brought to you by my Post, Glowe tells you about this last week. What a great way to remember your high school athletes athletic journey. So I’ll tell you how it all works. But what you’re gonna do is you’re gonna make these custom metal prints that helps capture the magic of that time when your kid was playing high school sports. So here’s one of the samples.

It’s called a dream come true, the journey to the starting lineup, and you see a young football player holding a football, and there’s some copy there and some quotes. One is so proud of Casey, of never giving up, another saying an inspiration to us all. Here’s a basketball one with Sarah’s buzzer beater victory and a recap of what happened. So what you do is you go to my postglowe dot com and they’ll ask you a bunch of questions. Then you schedule your free design consultation.

You join in a virtual session to customize the article layout, make any desire changes of personalizations. Then you receive a custom keepsake showcasing the full journey of the milestone printed on metal. Comes in either eleven by fourteen or sixteen by twenty. Why metal, because it’s cooler looking. It gives it a little elegance, little durability.

Do you need to frame it, John? No? Do you know how many posters I have over in the basement that I never bothered your frame? You know how many I’m sitting in the office right now looking at posters. I didn’t frame.

Why because I don’t know. I just I don’t feel like going to buy a freme metal awesome. No frame. Create a lasting I guess see that can be cherished and passed down through generations. The custom masterpiece serves as a constant reminder of your child’s hard work dedication at achievements.

You get a personalized story, photos and design included, free gift wrapping and shipping. Each piece meticulously designed and crafted to capture the essence of your child’s triumphs. Special offer running on the site right now my postglow dot com. Take advantage of the limited time offer of ten percent off that offers good until the fourth of July. These look really fantastic.

Pop on over to my postglow dot com. You’ll see the examples. You’d be like, Oh, okay, John, I get it. Yeah, you’re right. I often say to my family, you know, when you get the good times, take a moment and enjoy them.

You don’t always get the good one. It can be easy to take success for granted. Take the time to celebrate, recognize, Remember my postglow dot com, my postglow one word dot Com. And as I was trying to fill out some podcasts, as it’s been a little slow coming out of a Memorial Day, I was typing various comedian names into Google and I went to Sam Kinnison and I found this story from twenty thirteen or a ten year old story. And as you know, nothing ever happened of the Sam Kinnison movie starring Josh Gad.

What Yes? This from Deadline back in twenty thirteen. Deadline has learned in twenty thirteen that Larry Charles, the filmmaker behind movies such as Borat, has been hired to director the Sam Kinison feature Josh Gadd from the Book of Mormon. He was going to play Sam Kinison Yeah Yeah, based on the book by Bill Kinnison, Sam’s brother. The film was going to be titled Kinnison and would begin in the early eighties as Sam broke away from the family business of pentecolist still preaching, moved to Hollywood where he could start his career in stand up.

The success ended up getting to him and he fell deep into the world of drugs and alcohol. He was able to clean up his acts, but his potential field career was cut short in nineteen ninety two when his car was struck head on by a drunk driver. Producer David Permit said in the statement ten years ago, there was nothing conventional about Sam Kinison. Neither will be the cinematic interpretation of his life. Larry chur Else is the perfect director to bring Rich Wilkie’s incredible script to screen, and Josh Gad’s tremendous ability to morph into a role will bring great depth to Kinnison’s larger than life PERSONA.

Wonder whatever happened to that movie? Can we bring that back? And that’s your comedy news for today. Follow the show for free on Apple Podcasts or Spotify or wherever you get your podcasts. If you’re on YouTube, smash that like button.

See tomorrow

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Full Transcript

The Shark Deck. Johnny Mack with Your Daily Comedy News, came across an article on cracked dot com then asks a wonderful question about Seinfeld, which is is Elane hot? Now we’re not talking about Julia Louis Dreyfuss, who’s absolutely gorgeous. We are talking about Elaine Venice and I love this question. Cracked asks is Elane canonically hot?

If she is, why is she hanging out with these dorks? Is she a hot woman doing dorky things? Or is she a dorky woman who happens to be extremely hot? They also ask our hotness and dorkiness mutually exclusive m There’s an episode in season seven, the Secret Code, more commonly known as the Bosco episode, and which Elaine pursues a man who can’t seem to remember her. Crack says, if Elaine is an average looking woman, then her forget abilities one thing no one likes to be forgotten.

But if she is she appears to be stunning, then her pursuit of Fred, an aggressively below average man is much funnier. Isn’t a woman clawing her way up to win the affection of a man. She’s a beautiful woman. Seeking to subterranean depths Cracked Rights. Here’s some evidence that Elane wasn’t created specifically as a beautiful woman, but in appealing every gal.

Before Elane became a Lane, there was Claire, who’s a down to earth waitress who filled it as the woman in the pilot. Yeah, there’s no Elane in the pilot. When the role was reconceived, Rosey O’Donnell was among those considered. The character is rumored to be based on Seinfeld writer Carol Leef. It seems that when Jerry Seinfeld and Larry David considered a female character for the foursome, they didn’t want her hotness to be paramount.

Perhaps this is why Seinfeld’s men regularly acted like Elane was at best average looking. Some of this is explained by the whole setup. Jerry had dated Elane and they were both mature enough to continue a platonic friendship. George and Kramer coat of the guys you would respect that you wouldn’t go after Elane. That makes total sense to me.

Krack points out, had it gone in the direction of Jerry and friends being attracted to Elane, Seinfeld would be more like Friends or maybe the Big Bang theory, the show’s chemistry would have been all altered. Jennifer Kelshin Armstrong is a Seinfeld expert who says, I can tell you this, which is that I know the writers made it clear that they were not doing that, that that in question was a will they or won’t they type of tension between Jerry or any of the men and Elane. The network was always harassing them to create a Sam and Diane on Cheers type of thing with Elane and Jerry, and they finally said, no, we’re not doing that. We’re not a normal sitcom. Okay, how about the overwhelming proof that Elane is really pretty?

Some examples all three men snap out of it in season three’s of the Tape when Elane records a sexy message on Jerry’s tape recorder.

Also in season four is the Shoes, and season seven’s The Gum, other men are s…

Perhaps the clearest confirmation that Elane is canonically beautiful is by the transitive property of the men she dates. Here’s the Jerry theory. Jerry only dates beautiful women throughout the span of the show. There have been reported seventy three different women that Jerry dated, and they’ve been played by Lauren Graham, Kristen Davis, Courtney Cox, Morley Maitland, Terry Hatcher, among others. Elane dated Jerry, therefore Elane is beautiful.

All right, that makes sense. How about the law of Putty. Putty, who presents as a hunk, would never date a woman that wasn’t physically beautiful. Putty dates Elane, hence Elane is beautiful. Then there’s the famous man thesis.

In Seinfelds New York City men are constantly dating women out of their league. The application is that the women are settling. The dating pool in this universe is advantageous towards men. The exceptions to the rule are people like JFK. Junior and Keith Hernandez, who are implied to be the catch.

They’re so famous, especially in New York City, they could date anyone and both of them or just in it Elane h What do you think? Facebook group, Daily Comedy News podcast group would love your thoughts. Now, I let’s see Seinfeld. What years were Seinfeld? Seinfeld was eighty nine to ninety eight, So in eighty nine, I’m twenty and in eighty nine.

Julia Louis Dreyfuss isn’t around twenty eight. As I watched the show, I liked earlier season regular Girl. Towards the end of the series, she GLAMs up a little bit, and that’s just kind of how I roll it in real life. And I remember we used to hang out at a bar called Sidetracks and Queens and there was a woman we had dubbed the Elane Waitress. She had that same kind of big hair that Elane has in the early episodes.

We love the Elane Waitress. Anyway, what do you think? Obviously Julia Louis Dreyfuss gorgeous. Have you seen pictures of her lately? Fantastic move on.

John Pete Davidson has been wearing uggs lately. His stylists, Britt Theodora, told GQ Pete Davidson is even getting custom pairs made because they don’t make fun colors in men’s sizing. And guess who has influenced Pete Davidson to wear ugs? That’s right, Adam Sandler. Bete says, I’m a big Sailor fan.

I think Saidler is like ten years ahead of everyone. On fashion, and he wore uggs a lot in the y early two thousands. According to Pete Davidson, there’s some sort of oh you don’t give a hoot attitude that comes from wearing ugs. It’s very powerful. You have grocery shopping, or you go to the movies, you go out of your house and uggs.

That’s cool. Man, Just for laughs. Is coming back to Toronto for twenty twenty three. That is a great festival. You guys often hear me talk about Montreal.

I did the Toronto one one time and I really loved it. If you want to take my advice and go see less famous comedians in bar settings, Toronto is fantastic for that September twenty feet through the thirtieth. Some of the names announced Andrew Schultz, Leslie Jones, Jonathan van Ness, Nicole Bayer, Marlon Wayne’s, Ronny Chieng, Ron Funches, Patty Harrison, Chris Read, Neil Brennan. Wow, oh there’s more. I just needed to breathe, Michelle Wolf, Mark Ford, Rory Scovel, Joe to Rosad, will Say, Sloan, Jessica Curson, Samarel, Tom Papa, Jim Norton, Michelle but So Joanne McNally, Drew Lynch and more.

Wow, the office ladies are going to be there and there will be a Napoleon Dynamite screening and QNA JFL Toronto, September twenty first through the thirtieth sounds fantastic. The folks over at Fireball Dragon Reserve Noah slow newsweek when they see one. So they put out a press release suggesting you get some of their bourbon for your dad for Father’s Day. They tricked Johnny macken and talking about this, they pulled out Rob Riggle and said, just like Fireball. Rob Riggle is known for bringing laughs and spicing up anything heat such as it was a no brainer to make him our honorary and Master Distiller for Dragon Reserve.

His deadpan delivery and rebellious ir reverend personality was the perfect combination to bring this anything but boring product to life. That’s right, Rob Riggle crown the first honorary Fireball Master Distiller. In his highly coveted role, rob Riggle helped shape the final result of Dragon Reserve through Riggers product testing. The result, says Wriggle, absolute fire well done. Press team.

The La Times had a lengthy article about how much your comedians getting paid, And I’m not talking about Pete Davidson and Dave Chappelle, talking about your rank and file working comedian. Megan Cooster has been grinding in the LA comedy scene for several years. She said, I absolutely do not make a living doing comedy. Occasionally I’ll get paid for a college gig or a partner sag Ultralo budget production. But you couldn’t even buy a two thousand and one toyotas Sell with the amount of money I generate yearly from comedy.

I wonder how much it trissell is. Oh yeah, I’m Google, and of course I am all right. I don’t want on one of those used car websites two thousand and one Toyota Corolla l E price seventy nine ninety great value up, there was an accident reported. I don’t want that one. I want with no accidents.

Let me go down. Here’s one at two thousand and one Toyota Corolla l E sixty nine ninety eight. No accident or damage reported. It’s got eighty seven thousand miles on it, which is not a lot at all for a twenty something year old car, but as usual I digress. Derek Brown opens at sold out headliner shows on the road and says he brings in about five hundred dollars per show.

If I’m headlining or featuring around LA, the pays usually twenty dollars. Megan Coaster says, when you have three jobs and crippling debt, you literally can’t afford to stay up until three am every night pretending to respect an agent. I mostly sell trash I acquire for free on eBay. I’m a garbage woman. LA.

Comedian writer Ellery Smith says the swings are huge between year to year. I’ll make anywhere from five hundred dollars to two thousand dollars a year on Comedy Wow. The official poverty line, according to the IRS, is far above that, so Ellery moonlights as a babysitter, copywriter, or even working at a shady donut shop. I wonder what a shady donut shop is, she says. Thirty to forty thousand dollars would change everything for me.

The UCB Upright Citizens Brigade Theater is under new ownership and they’re trying to change things. They have worked out that all shows are paid the same, which is a fifty fifty split after house recruitment, which is forty five tickets sold for every show regardless of ticket price. But the LA Time says note any show could have anywhere from two to fifty performers, which means pay could range from six dollars to fifty dollars per performer depending on the ticket sales. One of the suits of the theater says, the goal here is the theater does not lose money. That will always be the only goal for the theater.

There’s no way you’re going to make money on this theater. It’s just impossible. Stand Up Jay Light has worked his way up the ladder in the LA comedy scene, earning a credit on the Comedy Central version of Roast Battle. He says he currently owns seven to ten thousand dollars annually doing comedy, yet stand up has helped him get gigs writing for reality competition shows including Master Chef, Master Chef Junior, and Domino Masters. That’s your Comedy needs for Today.

Follow the show for free on Apple, podcast, Spotify, YouTube, revigate your shows, and if you’re on YouTube, smash the like buttons. See tomorrow