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Caloroga Shark Media. Hello, I’m Jenny Mack with your Daily Comedy News. I am warmed up. I just did about a forty minute discussion with Dylan from the Facebook group, which is Daily Comedy News podcast group feeling courts to join. He had seen Mitch Hedburg live, so I wanted to talk to Dylan about Mitch Hedburg, and then we wound up talking comedy for another half hour after that, so we’ll run that later in the week.
My plan this weekend is to have two specials about Mitch Hedberg, who passed away twenty years ago on Sunday. But let’s start with happier things, or maybe not if you’re Nicky Glazer. She’s a little worried about making political jokes. She told reporters on the red carpet at the Conan thing, like you’re just scared that you’re gonna get docksed and death threats or who knows where this leads, like detained. Honestly, that’s not even like a joke.
It’s like a real fear. So it’s unfortunate that that’s true. But I’m not gonna lie and say I don’t think about that sometimes Ago, Oh God, can I just say, I hope they’ll know. I can be up on the gallows and say I was just joking. I’m a comedian.
I hope that’s a defense. Did you see the whole thing with the leaked war plans? Via text ver Das got in on this. This from the Hindustan Times, your home for comedy news. On Instagram, Vir shared a series of messages he received from a person who referred to themselves as Donald Trump.
In the exchange, the sender aka Donald Trump called ver Vivek. The Exchange, DJT writes, bro, we’re planning another assault you in Vir text back, I’m sorry, who is this? The sender responded, Trump Baby. Then an invite comes in. You want to come watch some drones this weekend?
Elon’s ninth kid bailed. We have a spare share in the situation room, Via writes back to DJT, No, sir, this is verr Das. DJT writes, what the f is a Verdas. You’re a brown dude. You’re not Vivek.
The exchange then says, there’s two effing me any of you, man. This is why I need Vivek. Furdasan jokes that Vivek’s number might be above my name and your contact list. Quote unquote, Trump writes back, Wait, you’re a comedian, you have a podcast. You have forty eight hours to leave the country.
Mega Das signed off, Yes, sir, no sir, and I’m a stay funny bit. Whatever’s going on there. Don Al Rawlings did a really a fantastic interview with Baltimore Positive dot Com the subject Elon Musk. Remember that time Elon showed up at the Dave Chappelle show. Donell told that story.
We did the show in San Francisco a few years ago. At that time Chappelle, I’m not gonna say it was friends, but you know, I’d be in conversation with Elon and then he’d come to shows. And I think Elon had an idea of wanting to do stand up, but I don’t think in front of a twenty thousand seed arena is a good place. And this was right after he laid off all those people in San Francisco. He went on stage and they booed the hell out of him.
And you know, there’s an iconic catchphrase I use on Chappelle’s show, which would have been perfect for Elon. I was like, yo, you gotta say it. He said say what, and I said, you gotta say I’m rich. But then he said it and he butchered it, and I said, no, you gotta say like yes. He didn’t get it, and that was the end of his comedy career.
Godfre E tells Fox News that the word racist is worn out and used too loosely. Godfrey says people accuse him of being racist for jokes in which he mentions the race of a person. They go, you’re racist, and I go, well, I can’t be. I didn’t stop you from going to school. I can’t be a racist.
Just because I talk about a racist doesn’t mean I’m racist. You see what I’m saying. If I go, well, white people do this a lot, White cops do this to black and it cuts off there, they go, you’re racist. No, they’re racist because they were stopping me, stopping frisking black people. Godfrey says, the critics are mad just because I’m telling you the truth.
I’m just describing a white person. You know, racist is when you stop people for buying houses. You can’t come in our neighborhood. You know, you can’t have this job because of the way you look, that’s racism. It’s an actual institutionalized method to stop people from progress just because I go, oh, there’s a white guy, there’s a black guy.
It’s not racism. I’m just describing. You see, there’s a difference. It’s a thin line. Godfrey says sometimes people say to him, stick to comedy, not politics, and I go, well, politics affect me, I pay taxes.
What do you mean stick to comedy because they’re mad at my opinion. So many people are moist nowadays. Moist is a fantastic word. Comedian Charlie Barns is involved in somebody Else impersonating Charlie. Charlie told Contact six, a news organization, if you get a DM from me asking for your favorite fishing spot, that could be legitimate.
However, in March, a six year old woman thought she got a message from Charlie on TikTok. She asked about his upcoming shows. The scammer offered to get her tickets. Then the scammer suggested they move the conversation off TikTok. She was told she needed to get a fan card to get backstage access.
To get one, she had to put five hundred dollars on an e gift card at Walmart, because you know that’s the system. You buy a comedian an E gift card at Walmart for five hundred dollars, and then you get to go backstage. By the way, can I tell you all, backstage is boring. Nothing happens backstage. Whatever you think is happening backstage, even at rock shows, is boring.
I will tell you a story. When I was at the old place, so you can all drink, I was in what I called the Springsteen Mafia. I got to know the Springsteen camp a little bit. So one time I got to go backstage at Giants Stadium. I think it was the old stadium, might have been the new stadium, doesn’t matter.
Right after the Springsteen concert, so I go back and there’s Bruce and the guys, and what do they do. They go, all right, Steve see tomorrow and they get in their cars and drive home. That’s it. There’s no party, there’s no babes, there’s no drugs. I mean, I’m sure to Guns n’ Roses show in La thirty years ago, stuff was going on.
But you go backstage with Larry the Cable guy and Jeff Foxworthy, they’re just sitting there having a beverage, and by beverage I might mean glass of water, perhaps a beer, and just kind of talking the way friends too. Anyway, backstage overrated. Definitely don’t pay five hundred dollars on an e gift card at Walmart to get backstage. Charlie says, have a lot of empathy for people because it’s getting harder and harder to decipher what is true and not true online. One red flag in the case the scammer’s TikTok name was Charlie Burn’s one twenty seven’s official account is Charlie Brenz.
He shares, if there’s any numbers behind my name on any of these things, that’s a no go, which reminds me John m’laney is raising money for charity. Send money to John mlani on you three, four or five at no kidding. The woman that says the scammer got to you friendly, calling her my dear and saying, I guess I’ve been around and waiting for you. She wrote back. Why in the world would the world famous Charlie Brenz tap the brakes of the world famous I’m not even sure I’m saying his last name correctly.
World famous is a little little exaggerated there. But why in the world would Charlie reach out to a complete stranger and sweet talk I got news, Reela. If you think comedians are reaching out on social media and sweet talking women, you’re not paying attention. Lisa Schiller is with the BBB serving Wisconsin. I assume that’s the better business bureau.
Lisa says, I think the thing with celebrity impersonation scams is people want them to be true. They’re going to ask for payment and an untraceable method such as a gift card. See, she’s not funny there. She should have said untraceable method such as a walmart E gift card. The laughter is always in the details.
You got to add the details. So I’m going to modify her quote. They’re going to ask for payment and untraceable methods such as a walmart E gift card or a litable card or wire transfer or cryptocurrency. Sure you can come backstage to send me one hundred thousand dogecoin. Jeff Dunham stepped and it let’s head on over to Gossip Corner.
He was in Rochester, New York, and the audience turned on him. Why Dunham said, I got booed when I didn’t know what a garbage plate was. Somebody had asked the question, dear Peanut, have you ever had a garbage plate? Peanut made a joke and I said, what’s a garbage plate? And people were liking sense that I’m in Rochester, New York.
I didn’t know what a garbage plate was, so we sent a runner out to get one. Now, if you don’t know what a garbage plate is, and I only do because this came up on the show at some point, I feel like Paton Oswalt or somebody was randomly in Rochester. This has come up before. The runner went to the garbage plate originator, Nick Tahoe Hats on West Main Street. You know the place, but it had closed for the night.
Then the runner went to Dogtown on Monroe and got a junk yard plate, which done him dug into. During the Facebook live feed. Before opening the container, he commented about how good it smelled and said, I apologize right now to Audrey, my wife, who looks out for my health, because I have a feeling this is not that. So what was on it? Macaroni salad, home fried potatoes, meat, sauce, mustard, onions, a hamburger, and a hot dog.
He said, I don’t know where to start on this thing. Gee whiz, this looks good. This is every vegan’s nightmare. He had a taste and said, I get it now. Now I know why the audience was angry with me for not knowing what this is.
This is savory. It is delicious. The mustard and the onions, and the hamburger and the hot dog and the potatoes. Yeah, how can you lose? So I took the break there because I got out on a funny note with the garbage plate story.
But here are some items that normally would be in the A block, but I just split it for pacing. Kevin Hart never afraid to work. He’s got a new movie for Netflix. It is called seventy two Hours. It stars Kevin Hart as a forty year old executive.
Kevin Hart is forty five, so he’ll be forty six by the time this comes out. He’s outrageously playing a forty year old executive who hopes to save his fleiling career by joining a group of twenty somethings on a wild three day bachelor party after he’s inadvertently added to their group text. So I guess picture the hangover, except Kevin Hart’s on it. You know what the Netflix algorithm A’re gonna stick it in front of everybody. We’re all gonna watch, including me.
Yeah, it’s gonna work on your Netflix. Chelsea Handler. By the way, it is ten fifty eight on Tuesday, and I’m recording this early because earlier this hour I caught up with Dylan from the Facebook group. You’ll hear me tell it. But I said to him, Igo, there was a day last week where you hadn’t watched one of the specials yet I was worried about you.
He has already watched Chelsea Handler, which, as I record this has been out for like four hours. It’s morning and he’s already watched Chelsea. I have not gotten to it yet. Chelsea till the l eight Times. The point of her special was who were you before the world really besmirched you?
When you were untouched and unscathed, when you haven’t had your heart broken or been disappointed or experienced a big tragedy yet, who were you? Then? That’s really the essence of who you are. As for herself, and she also has a book she said, I’m at a place in my life where I try not to put that kind of pressure on myself. I wanted to make sure that even if it wasn’t number one, that’d be grateful and gracious and not be so competitive with myself or with others.
To find out that it was number one when I’d accept it might not be was the best news. I’m so proud of myself for never falling into getting married or having a baby when I know these things aren’t natural to who I am. I am valuable without a husband. I’m a queen with or without a husband, and so are all women. I firmly believe that.
And she speaks truth here in this next chunk. When you hate your fifties, you return to who you are. You start caring a lot less about what people think, and you’re also much more present. Amen and Amen. The past is not a preoccupation like it was in my twenties, worrying about what I’d done, if I’d said something to embarrass myself.
I do that a lot less. I do that less often, so there is less to be regrettable about. One piece of advice that I have taken a heart. It’s from Kylo Wrenn, you know the bad guy from the Star Wars sequels. But he’s got a line of dialogue which is let the Past Die.
And I think it is great advice album. Can I signbar? So I was in Ireland last week. This is related to stay with me, nothing to do with comedy, but to do what I just talked about. So I went up to Belfast and I took what’s called a black cab tour, so I was driven around.
My family and I were driven around by a man who had grown up during the troubles, and he showed us the neighborhoods and they still to this day locked the gates between the Protestant neighborhood and the Catholic neighborhood at ten pm. And he showed me how the fence is right up against the Catholic side. So if you’re on the Catholic side and he wanted to throw something over the fence to hit the Protestants, well, the Protestant houses or like forty fifty feet back from the fence, so you really don’t have the angle to throw such a thing. Whereas if you’re on the Protestant side and you want to lob something over the fence. It’s pretty easy to hit the Catholic side, And it was just the whole thing was powerful.
I was honestly choked up for like the entire hour and a half tour. But one thing he said was, you know, was never about religion. It was just about economic stuff and they’re leaving it behind. And he explained about the gates. He goes, it’s not a great solution, you know.
I could see that you might think it’s strange because it’s working for us, and it works fine. Another thing I heard a lot over there was how the Irish feel about the British, which is totally different from how Grandma felt about it. Their attitude is, you know, what stuff happened one hundred and fifty years ago. Let the past die. Get back to the show, John Okay.
Chelsea Handler enjoys hosting the Critics’ Choice Award and says, I love making fun of celebrities and getting drunk with them afterward. It’s kind of the perfect evening for me. Now, will she get a talk show again? In twenty twenty five? The easiest way to get a late night talk show as a woman is to get the creators of hacks to write a fictional story about it.
John Mulaney shows on tonight your guest Pete Davidson, Lunel Macpacker, Henry Winkler and a funeral director and music from Mannequin Pussy. And that is your comedy news for today. If you join the program, tell a friend about it, they might like it. To see you tomorrow.