Daily Comedy News Podcast Transcripts

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The shark deck name Jenny Mack with Your Daily Comedy News. Chelsea Handler told the story to Jimmy Fallon that I guess we’re supposed to believe and go along with the joke, but honestly, I don’t believe it. It got a lot of headlines. Chelsea told Jimmy Fallon, I didn’t know until I was forty years old that the sun and the moon were not the same thing. Really, Jimmy played along.

I found this hard to believe. What are you talking about? Handler said it was shocking to me as well. Chelsea was on with Fallon promoting her appearance last weekend on the Critics Choice Awards, and she is openly campaigning for The Daily Show hosting gig and she’ll be guest hosting that in February. Anyway, her story is she was on a safari in Africa.

She told Jimmy, my sister and I were riding on an elephant and there was a man riding an elephant for us because we don’t know how to ride an elephant. My older sister, Simone looked up at the sky and said, Chelsea, look up. It’s not often you get to see the sun on the moon at the same time, you know, except like once a month if you’re up at like six thirty in the morning and the moon is setting in the west and the sun is rising in the east. And I see this all the time, she teld Jimmy. I was like, scooby doo.

I’m like, whoa, I said, wait, but they’re always together. As soon as I said that, my sister turned around. She goes, what did you say? She said, I need you to tell me what you think is happening between the sun and the moon. Chelsea said, I was like, honestly, I just assume when the sun went down, it popped back up as the moon.

The man riding the elephant spoke into English and went and he’s like another time American, you know, all right? Okay, So, first of all, I don’t believe that you thought the sun in the moon were the same thing. I just don’t believe you’re that stupid. Second, why did the man riding the elephant go? If he doesn’t speak English, how did he know what you were talking about?

Maybe he understands English but doesn’t speak It. Is that what you’re saying here? I call hogwash on this entire story. There’s no way, You’re that stupid. Vulture had a fantastic profile of Sarah Sherman under the headline a beautiful mind.

For Sarah Sherman, comedy is all about putting on a show and being absolutely disgusting. I shared this on Tuesday No Wednesday on the Facebook group Daily Comedy News podcast group. I also shared it in the subreddit which is Daily Comedy News, Walter writes. In May twenty twenty one, shortly before being cast on SNL, Sarah made a video called the Sara Vaccine, in which she made a concoction of gasoline, juice and the special ingredients urine. I’m cleaning that up for you.

She used a nasty version of the P word anyway, it’s gasoline, juice and urine, and then drank it. She said, I did a show in Portland and my friend Tammy had to walk out in the middle of a puke in the parking lot. Sarah considers that an accomplishment. She’s known for playing a version of herself on Weekend Update in which she goads Colin Jost. An example, she asked Colin Jost why there are no Jews at SNL.

Colin says there are Jews on the show, including her. Sarah then turns to the camera and says, in other news, local wet blanket Colin Jost is keeping track of the amount of Jews at SNL. I like when she does that bit a lot of fun. She knows what people expect to hear about her past, and she bristles at it. Sarah said, I think a lot of people like to romanticize comedians, being outsider romantic losers.

She grew up on Long Island. She was odd but not off puttingly, so she had her Miss Vaughan April Fool’s Day. She claimed the date was not intentional, just to gift from God. She sent invitations in the form of snakes in a can. A member of the high school improv team, she’d always been attracted to the grotesque.

One time she painted a picture of a baby bottle full of intestines. If she were a character on Glee, she would have been Slushy. In real life, she ran track. She said, I had friends as well liked us funny. I’m a comedian, so I needed people to like me.

I have a deep, dark desire within me to be accepted by others. I also have a desire to make things that are insane, but the part of me that wants to make things that are insane still des really needs people to like it. She adopted the stage name Sarah Squirm, inspired by a high school nickname. A couple of her friends ran a record label and booked her for gigs as a comedian alongside a bunch of quote noise musicians. Sarah said, I was doing basement shows with bands literally called and I’m cleaning it up here.

You’re in your in eurin moan moan moan. I was like, it can’t be blood liquor. You’re in ear neurin moan moan moan. And Sarah when she started her own Noise and Come Many show Hell Trap Nightmare, the poster included an illustration of, as she describes it, a uterus, where the eggs were eyeballs, the smile was an open vagina, the lips were made out of intestines, and there was a severed finger as a tampon. At it all righty fun article if you want to check it out on my socials.

The spokesman called up with Dan Cummins, he talked about when he started at comedy said it was a forgettable sports bar season ticket had what they called a club inside it called Laughs. It was a little spot in the sports bar, plywood painted black laughs and wasn’t much at all, but it started me on his current tour. I’m going to address the current polarization we’ve had over recent years. We’ve become so divided, and everyone sees that. Over the last few election cycles, everyone has gotten so tribal.

Most are either on the left of the right. There’s a lot more choices. The spectrum is huge. Would people ignore that I talk about heavier subjects like abortion. I talk about the lack of critical thinking.

There’s so much to go on about. So I’m reading the story. I’m now flashing back. I went bowling with Dan Cummins. Was that much?

All? Was that Chicago? I think it was in Chicago, just for last Chicago anyway, I vaguely remember having a few beverages and bowling with Dan Cummins at like one thirty in the morning or so. Yeah. Anyway, He says I wasn’t a comedy nerd as a kid, and I’m still not a comedy nerd.

I love George Carlin, but I’d rather read David Sedaris’s books. I wasn’t that in the stand up growing up. I like sketch comedy more, but I was in high school. I never dreamed of comedy as a career. In September, he’s going to host a camping event where he’ll be performing this in the Poconos.

He says, it’s our second year of doing this. It’s a unique situation for fans of my Comedy End podcast. We have a camp on a four hundred acre spread with a heated pool and some cool amenities. We’re hoping five hundred two thousand people come out. I’ll be putting together my own production.

We’re just gonna have fun. That’s gonna be great. But right now I’m focusing on my tour. Hey, if you want to support the show, you can go to buy meacoffee dot com slash Daily Comedy News. I wasn’t planning on doing the plug today, but to commodate my schedule, I’m recording three of these podcasts back to back to back.

This is the third one and my voice is giving out, so I’ve been sipping the ice coffee right next to me, so you can go to buy me a coffee dot com slash Daily Comedy News. You can throw five dollars on the tip jar, and what I’ll do is I’ll take your five bucks. I’ll drive down into town, hit the local donuts chain and I will get a large iced coffee with caramel and milk, and then I will shout you out on the show. You got all support the show by joining the two dollar Club. That’s just a monthly two dollars membership as they call it, and every month two of your dollars will make its way to my wallet.

Just a nice way to join the club, and I will of course shout you out and thank you. So it’s buy meacoffee dot com slash Daily Comedy News. Just for last, London has announced some more shows. Chortle with the recap. The new shows include stand up from US comedians Michelle Wolf and Brad Williams.

Both are fantastic. Those are major ads. There a cabaret lineup gig affronted by Jordan Gray and this excites me. A UK incarnation of the New Faces showcase. Wow, that’s awesome.

Also more details for Max and Ivan’s the wrestling. I’m fascinated by this and I need to educate myself more on but apparently comedians fight. Phil Wang, who I think is fantastic, has joined along with Alex Horne, Glenmore and Abbie Clark. Joe Lysat will be acting as Moore’s manager, while Greg James and Nish Kumaro have joined Ashling b on the commentary desk. Sue Perkins will be hosting a panel event called Comic Relief Proud every Day, talking about how the charity helps LGBTQ plus projects Just for Laughs London March second through the fifth, and during the week the movie Half Baked turned twenty five.

Cracked spoke with director Tamara Davis. She said Dave Chappelle and Neil Brandon were like twenty three at the time they were the writers. Dave had so much energy and he was so excitable. Dave felt by making this movie it would allow him to smoke weed wherever he wanted. He was so fun and he was game for anything.

There was so much hopefulness and promise in both him and Neil. It was my job to make sure I got that energy on film. Chapelle was set as the star funding the other guys, which tricky. We wanted people Dave could really work with, and we wanted people up and coming in comedy. Jim Brewer came from SNL and he was solid, all right.

So how high was everybody on the set of Half Baked? Tamer said, you can’t really work and be high. I mean some people can set the rogue and can, but generally I don’t think you can. As for the actors, if they were flubbing their lines and everyone knew it was because they’d smoked weed, would be considered super unprofessional. All that being said, there were two times that there really was weed on the set.

I didn’t know it then, but I heard later that they got high before doing the flying scene. Then there was the cameo with Snoop dog We were shooting on the Universal lot and we had fake weed and Snoop said, no way, I’m gonna really smoke weed. There was no way to tell Snoop you couldn’t smoke weeds, so we lit up a joint. Then I saw security coming over and I was like, oh no, we’re gonna get shut down. Security started surrounding us.

I yelled cut and then they said to me, Hey, you think it’s okay if we get an autographed from Snoop Dogg chick Comedy Needs for Today. Follow show for free on Apple, podcast, Spotify, YouTube, wherever you get your shows See tomorrow. Did you hear about the border collie who recycles trash and when he’s out on his walks? Or how about the bear that stole so much Chick fil A? But good News left the salad behind.

Hi, I’m Johnny Mack, host of Five Good News Stories. Don’t worry. I have stories about humans too, Like there’s a woman who makes a living because she looks like Jim Carrey. It’s my podcast. It’s five Good News Stories, Five Good News Stories the number.

Five good News Stories twice a week. Five Good News Stories. Oh, and Shamrock shakes her back too. Good News Five Good News Stories. Wherever you get your shows

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Full Transcript

The Shark Deck, a local comedy podcast, are recorded a twelve minute podcast and realized he forgot to unmute his microphone, resulting in none of the podcasts being recorded. Sources say the episode spoke about Jim Gaffigan, Mark Norman, and Jeff Dunham, but was lost to time due to the incompetent behavior of the host. Welcome to Take Two, Tampa Bay’s at Night Guide caught off with Jim Gaffigan. Hey, Jim Gaffgan, A lot of the content you do is focused on your home life and family. How do your kids feel about that?

Gaffigan said, Yeah, it’s so interesting because you know, being a comedian is similar to every stage where you have children. There’s a point where they’re like, they don’t know what you do. They’re may be impressed at some point and then they’re like not impressed. But I would say they’re an endless source of material. And if you’re not complaining about your kids, you’re not president enough, you know what I mean.

Jim is making me laugh here because my kids have no idea what I do. I just I call it. I go down to the basement and I talk to myself and it’s probably from them, They’re like, why is dat and home all? What is he even doing all day? Because it looks like I’m goofing off on the laptop all day.

But you know, I have to write these things, I have to edit them, I have to post them their social media. I’m not saying I’m a construction worker out in one hundred degreee heat. I’m not complaining at all, but I could see my kids being like, what do you do all night? Did Tampa Bay Date Night Guide? Which is your home for comedy?

I forgot to mention that, said to Jim, your seventeen year old son, Jacket Gaff again, it has performed before and even open for you at one point. Is that something he wants to continue doing? Will he following your footsteps? Jim said, Granted, my son is seventeen, but you never have an idea of how long this interest is gonna last. You know, a kid could be really in a buzz Lightyear, so he convert their room and a buzz Lightyear thing, and then they’re like, I don’t like buzz Lightyear anymore.

I also want to encourage them, but I don’t want to force him to do it. He’s done it a bunch, but I’m also very much in the approach of letting him bring it up to me when he wants to do it. Good parenting. Jim gaff again, what about the other kids, Jim said, they’re all kind of funny. You know, it’s weird.

Sometimes even in parents teacher conferences, the teacher will be like, your child’s very funny, and I’m like, I want them to learn to read and write. So it’s one of those things you know, you’re just falling along seeing where it’s going to happen. Mark Norman and Sam Morrel do a podcast called We Might Be Drunk, in which they drink, talk about the comedy world, and ramble through random recommendations and observations. Out of that, they’ve released a special label Booze called Bodega Cat Whiskey, who reflects on their lives in New York, where there are bodega’s on many corners. Sam Morrell said, there’s something special about the bodega experience, like the weird little guy behind the counter who knows way too much about your life.

He sees you at two am, and then he sees you again at ten am. He sees you making the mistake and then he sees you paying for the mistake the next morning. Cracked as an article. Eleven comedian action figures you can find on eBay, ranked by how much they’re going for. Are you ready for these?

First up, ninety three will get you Dan Ackroyd as Beldar the cone Head, Number ten the blue collar Comedians for seventeen bucks. Now as part of the licensing deal, it’s just Jeff Lowry and Bill ron White apparently did not get a doll.

Also, the description says, squeeze their ample beer bellies and each one’s b…

Now Larry, Yeah, Larry’s got a bit of a belly, Jeff Foxworthy does not, and Bill Angwall does not. I’d actually describe Jeff Foxworthy as skinny. Been in the room with all three of these men many times, so I don’t know why the Jeff Foxworthy doll would have a beer belly. By the way, Accordity listenings, Bill and Larry the Cable Guy need new batteries. I guess people didn’t play with the Bill Angwall one that much.

Next up for twenty bucks, John Belushi in his Animal House persona with the College shirt. Twenty nine dollars and twenty six cents would get you a boar At, but only the head. It’s a custom made bore At one sixth scale head to direct from Kazakhstan by way of China. To description is brand new and high quality, very nice. The next one for thirty two bucks Colin Quinn, Jay Leno, and Robert Klein.

It’s a set Krack says. Maybe you want to recreate a lost nineteen ninety three episode of The Tonight Show or raise money from the homeless by putting on your own comic relief thirteen Avin Castell Hello, a set for forty nine ninety five gibe Kaplan looks like it’s in the original Welcome Back Cotter packaging fifty seven twenty nine. If you want to play with mister Cotter, it’s been almost fifty years, I’d leave that in the packaging. At this point, a custom Bill Burr will run you one hundred dollars. This is not a Mandalorian figure.

This is Bill Burr as a comedian in a blue shirt and some black pants. Comes with a microphone, and it’s on a faux back canner card that looks like a Star Wars backing card, but it is not as a custom The third one is someone named Eggashira, who was unfamiliar with apparently a Japanese comedian, and as I mentioned on the opening, this is the second time I’m doing this list, and it wasn’t that interesting the first time, so skip it. Move along. Number two Rob Schneider San Francisco Giants Edition, two hundred bucks. This is Rob Schneider and plaid pants wearing a San Francisco Giants jersey.

Not sure why that exists, but Crack points out they’re thirteen of them. On eBay. You can buy the one for two hundred dollars, but somebody else is selling it for seventeen ninety seven. And the one that boggles the mind is a signed Gabriel Iglesias Funco Pop going for four thousand dollars Cracked Rights. For some reason, Funco has released countless editions of Fluffy figures.

There’s Tapetillo, Fluffy Stadium, Fluffy Away Stadium, Fluffy, Fluffy with Dogs Day the Dead Fluffy, all more or less with Iglesia’s accurate body types. But if you want to splurge, this four thousand dollars Signed Pop Comedians Edition is for you today. It be snow Jam Comedy Festival or you in at Sioux Falls, South Dakota. If you are, I hope you’re at the festival. If not, what are you doing?

Kicks off today at eleven am. Intro to Improv with Improv falls. Eleven am is awesome. I like to go to bed at night and eleven am show. I’m there.

That’s a boss comedy club Jackie Kation. She’s recording the dork Forest Live podcast. That’s happening at one o’clock at the Spellbound Magic Shop and Theater. That sounds like a fun place. Let me look that up.

Spellbound Magic Shop resides in Sioux Falls, South Dakota. They have a pop up bad that offers you ten percent and messes up your flows as your trying to read some copy for your podcast just pops up and it blocks the scent that you’re trying to read. We have a small shop full of beginner magic to advance routines. We offer classes and have our very own private fifty seat theater for parlor shows and variety acts. Looks like a good time at five o’clock.

Awesome start time again. So cool. The Snowflakes Comedy Showcase Ten Comedians. Love a ten comedians showcase. I really truly enjoy that type of show because you get to see so many new faces and get turn on a new comedians.

Plus it’s at five o’clock, so I could bang out ten comedians and a host and then go to bed. Who love it at seven thirty? Still nice and early The Hot Coco Comedy Showcase. This one also features ten comedians from around the country, but not the same ten boy back to back. If I could see twenty comedians and be done by nine pm, go back to my room, watch the football game tonight?

Who love this festival?

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And then for you crazy people that can stay up to midnight, Jackie Kasen is y…

She’s playing at ten o’clock at Bosses Comedy Club the snow Jam Comedy Festival. Nice job of folks. If you want to check out some information Snowjamcomedyfest dot com. Decider was asking Jeff Dunham about how the puppets get made. He said, I really seriously didn’t get into the dummy making until the mid eighties when I was in college.

Back then it was plastic, wooden, fiberglass, and those are the mediums that I used until like ten to twelve years ago. I still sculpt them in clay. However, I do have a digital sculpture now that helps me. Every once in a while, I’ll give them notes and he’ll come up with something digitally and we put it together, won’t I have time. I make them out of clay, then I do a three D scan, and then I build a shell of dummy with a three D printer.

So yeah, there’s still a little human element in there. I like this next part. I hated doing the fiberglass stuff. The walter that I use now I made out of fiberglass, and after getting high in the garage not meaning to, I thought it was a horrible thing. Apparently fiberglass makes you high.

So I would give the sculpts to somebody else and he would make the fiberglass head for me. But I got out of fiberglass as fast as possible. That is for people who have air filters. How that’s your comedy news for today. Follow the show for free on Apple Podcasts, Spotify YouTube.

I’m gonna make sure I actually save this file. See you tomorrow.

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Full Transcript

The Shark Deck. Hey, I’m Jenny mackwe your daily community. It was real quick. I’ve been very happy with the show this week because I’ve been able to get into different topics. Today is no different.

The headline from Yahoo Chance the Rapper defends Dave Chappelle’s gay jokes comment in Ghana. This was at the Black Star Line Festival in Ghana on January sixth. Dave Chappelle apparently made some waves. Dave’s joke was I bet gay jokes go over so well here. Apparently everybody laughed about it.

Chanced the Rapper explains, I think it’s something that Dave was actually shining a light on. That’s where the conversation came from. Dave was making a comment about the comedy scene in Ghana when he said, I bet gay jokes go over so well here, to which everybody laughed about. And he was making a point to saying, Ghana, you can make jokes about things that are about gay people, about trans people, about a lot of social constructs, just about anything in the world, but you can’t make a comment about the government there. That’s not funny and that’s not respected, and it can be dangerous.

It’s the complete opposite where we come from. Where we can speak about the government all we want, I can’t really all the way speak for Dave. I don’t want to say what he thinks or what he feels. But what I think I know about him is that he loves everybody, especially as people meeting black people, meeting black people that are trans, black people that are gay, black people that are general nonconforming people, period. And I think in that space, I would say I don’t believe that he bashed trans people are gay people at all.

Throughout the entire conversation, Chance also talked about apparently there’s some kind of bill that Chance labeled one of the most destructive things in Ghana’s future. Chance said it gives police license to target anybody, especially LGBTQIA plus people, based on something as simple as the clothes that they wear, how they self identify, or how that officer identifies them. And it’s anthetical to what I’m trying to do. I was giving Dave the opportunity to speak about who we are as a community because he was taking so much pride in the fact that he was respected as a black man in Ghana. But I don’t know he would be respected that much if he were a gay black man in Ghana or if he were trans in Ghana.

Meanwhile, from Ghana, Webb Dave Chappelle himself has shared his historic visit to Ghana with the rest of the world on Dave’s social media handles. Dave has documented his trip from when he boarded his flight to Ghana. On a voiceover, we hear Dave Chappelle saying, it takes many people a lifetime to make this one journey. Any single son or daughter that comes from the legacy of Africans who left these shores. Anytime one individual makes it back here, it defies the odds.

Also on the video, Dave Chappelle conveys how sad he was by the story he was told when he connected with the walls where the slaves had walked, among others, that is known as the door of no return awkward segue here. Guilda’s laughest returns to Grand Rapids, Michigan in twenty twenty three. The festival this year March eighth through the twelfth. Who’s Performing Pretty Good List Tig natar O, Pete Holmes, The Clean Comedy Showcase, DJ Demers, Mike Vecky, own bunch of others. There will also be something called kara jokim is Dennis Leary performing the material of Bill Hicks, Oh cheap Shot, Johnny mack ouch.

I wonder what kara joke is. Kara jokie. It’s a comedy with a chorus, showcasing comedians performing a stand up set and then immediately singing a karaoke song selected by you. I see, so stand up then karaoke. It’s not that Carlos Mincy is going to show up and do material.

Who another cheap shot? Jutty back? Come on, you’re laughing. We’ll keep an eye on Gildless laugh Fest as we get a little closer to that this weekend. David Keckner, you know him from lots of places, including the office, which will be relevant to this story.

He’ll be in Springfield, which one the Missouri one, and he’s bringing in his office trivia show that he hosts as Todd Packer for seventeen magazine spoke to David Keckner. He likes getting back to Missouri. One of the reasons is the annual The Big Slick charity fundraiser that takes place in Kansas City. It’s a charity for Children’s Mercy Hospital. He hosts it along with Robiggo, Paul Rudd, Jason Sadakis, and Eric stone Street.

That’s always in June. He also gets back for one or two Chiefs games as well. Convenient for you that you happen to be in Missouri Chiefs Jaguars tomorrow? Are you going David Keckner? He said, last year I had a pretty intense tour schedule.

I couldn’t get back to a game. How did he get to where he is now? He said, I was always a fan of comedy ever since I was young. I was the class cut up that I always enjoyed watching old comedies with my dad, Avin Costello, the Marx Brothers. That solidified it by the time I was thirteen, SNL debut and that’s when I decided that’s what I’m gonna do.

All right? What can we expect from the office trivia nights? He says, It’s not just a trivia thing. It’s a show because I tell stories of how I got the show, stories about the show, stories about my career, anecdotes, and I do Q and A. So it’s a unique experience.

It’s not going to be a regular Trivia Night. That’s why it’s hosted by the real Todd Packer with a blast doing it. And at the end of the show, the top two teams come up and they get to do a scene with the real Todd Packer right there. That’s a good time.

Speaking of a Saturday Night Live, new episode tomorrow, Aubrey Plaza’s your …

Jordan and musical guests A Little Baby. SNL has announced that they’ve changed the way standby tickets are going to work. Before we get to that, the ticket lottery for the current season is now closed. The ticket lottery for the twenty twenty three Slash twenty fourth season will open at midnight on August first, so write that in your calendar. To enter that lottery, send an email to SNL Tickets at NBCUNI dot com.

You may only send one email per person. Submissions entered before or after the ticket lottery window will not be considered, so don’t do it now. As for the standby cards, they will be distributed at twelve zo one am the Saturday of a show day, so you have to like be there at midnight as Friday turns into Saturday, get a standby card, then come back and hope you get in later that night. Or you can just sit home and watch them on TV, or hear me out, go to bed on Saturday night, wake up Sunday morning and watch the clips, or maybe watch the episode on your DVR. That’s what Johnny Mac does.

Ted Lasso is back for season three. We all knew that Apple TV Plus had a big to do, and they were like, Hey, ted Lasso’s coming back. That’s nice. What’s the date. They didn’t share a date, yet, they did share an image.

We see Jason sidekiss ted Lasso and Nick Muhammad’s Nates facing off now as rival coaches. That seems to be the driving story of season three. They also put out a trailer for something called Hello Tomorrow. I watched the trailer. I was entertained.

Hello Tomorrow is a rito futuristic vision of the future, so it’s like the nineteen fifties version of the future, so flying cars and robot vacuums and that kind of stuff. Billy krut Up stars as Check, a salesman of great talent and ambition whose unshakable faith and a brighter tomorrow inspires his coworkers, revitalizes his desperate customers, but threatens to leave him dangerously lost in the very dream that sustains him. This thing’s on Apple TV Plus February seventeenth. Look like it was pretty entertaining. I don’t know how funny it is or not, but the world that created looks pretty cool.

I’m not even sure it’s a comedy. Why did you mention it? I don’t know. I was doing the ted Lasso thing. I saw the thing, and now I told you the story, and now I realized, oh, maybe it’s not even a comedy.

Chelsea Handler announced her tour. I think comedians need to start running The tour names past me little Cocky by Baby, but she’s calling her twenty twenty three tour the Little Big Bitch Tour. Yeah, is that what you want to do? All right? The Little Big Bitch Tour kicks off April thirteenth in Peoria, stops in Boise, Las Vegas.

It’s also Memphis and more, before wrapping up in Atlantic City on June tenth. Of the Borgata, Chelsea says, because it’s been so much fun returning to stand up, I figured the more time I’ve been with my fans the better. It’s time to give people a little insight and how I turned into what I am today. The Little Big Bitch Tour is the sequel to her recent Vaccinated and Horny Tour, Snow Jam Comedy Festival, Sue Fall, South Dakota Today tomorrow. Get out there, hop on a plane.

What are you doing? Let’s check out today’s lineup? Wait, Dan Booblitz, did I mess this up yesterday and say you were doing your thing yesterday? Oh? Man, I hope you didn’t fly to South Dakota just to see Dan Booblitz at one o’clock because it wasn’t actually yesterday.

It’s today, Dan Booblige Junior. Building a better ePK for your success. Hey, it’s still good and you miss it. How about a plane you got till one o’clock? What time zone in South Dakota you can make it?

Do it? I don’t know if you could do it now, I’m curious. All right, South Dakota time zone. They’re in Mountain Okay, all right, so let me get a flight from Newark to South Dakota to Sue Falls. Let’s see.

Well for me from Newark, I don’t know where you live, but for me from Newark Airport. It’s eight hours and thirty five minutes with a connecting flight. So if you downloaded the podcast as soon as they’re released it at three or five am, you listen to it. We’re a few minutes in. So say it’s like three fifteen in the morning, you’ve got eight hours.

That make it eleven o’clock. You get two time zones back. You can make Dan boob what’s this thing? If you want to six o’clock snow Laughing matter. It’s a comedy showcase.

Talked about this yesterday. I love ten comedian shows. That one’s at six o’clock the big show tonight Miss Shannon you know her from nick Mom’s Night Out and Laughs on Fox eight thirty at the Spellbound Magic Shop and Theater. Then at eleven o’clock, Jam’s keeping me up late tonight eleven o’clock. Another one of those ten comedian showcases.

I love ten comedian showcases. The Snowtime Comedy Showcase ten comedians from around the country. Among the comedians, Reva Riley, DC based comedian who got her comedy start in London where she performed at Downstairs at the King’s Head. What a great name for a place. She was also a semi finalist in the UK national competition, So you think You’re funny.

She’s also performed at the North Carolina Comedy Festival snow Jam previously and the Boston Comedy Festival, also a great fest. Mike Hammick is also on the bill. His submitted bio says, Hey, I’ve been a comic for ten plus years. I currently run the new talent program at three E’s in Colorado Springs. I featured for Nick Thune, Tommy Davidson, Taylor Thomason, Nicka Stephano, Alex Moffett, Vinnie Montez, Chris Katan, Monte Franklin dot dot dot.

That is a nice resume there, snow Jam Comedy Festival. Check it out SnO Jam Comedyfest dot com. Maybe you’re not gonna hop on a plane right now, but they’ll do this festival again next year. Put it on your radar, plan and advance. That nineties show came out on Netflix.

Did they cancel it yet? Because they cancel everything. That’s why I don’t start shows on Netflix. They’re gonna give it one season and cancel it. Hopefully I’m wrong.

The Hollywood Reporter said, for every well considered wonder years, there’s a stilted How I Met Your Father, And this is the approach chosen by Netflix’s seventies show. Spent off that nineties show. No one is likely to describe the new sitcom as a bold take on the source and material, or praise its originality and bravery. It aims for nothing much more ambitious than recreating the low key charm of its predecessor, but it hits its target with enough confidence consistency to become a treat in its own right. All right, that’s not a bad review, right, one of those things not really aspiring to be anything other than what it is.

Dav Club called this version basically a xerox version of the original, only now we’re anchored by Eric and Donna’s daughter Leia, who decides to spend the summer of nineteen ninety five with her grandparents and learns in the process that she’s well suited to spending her days getting high in the basement while pining away for a cute boy and bonding with her next door neighbor, Gwen. If you grew up watching the seventies show, you’ll likely have no way of assessing whether that nineties show works on its own. Maybe it can’t, and maybe it doesn’t even want to. All right, those are fair reviews. That doesn’t sound horrible and from Deadline.

Michael Lair was a sketch, improv and stand up performer. His credits included The Second City. He has died of complications from als he was forty four. Lara kept performing even after his twenty seventeen diagnosis, appearing in Austin clubs in a wheelchair. He talked openly about his struggles with the disease on stage and on the comedy podcast Killed Tony.

Lair was selected as a new face of comedy at the twenty fourteen Just for Last Festival. On his last night at the Second City, he hired a tattoo artist to give him a tattoo of a brown line L train on his back. During his final improv set. Michael was terminally ill and chose to end his life with the assistance of a doctor. His life partner and caregiver, Collette Montague, said Michael died with dignity on his own terms medical aid and dying was the hardest decision he ever made.

Joe Rogan said on Instagram the urge this man had to do stand up while battling a dability hitting disease was insanely impressive and though he struggled to get words out, man he would kill on stage. He was a real legend and I’m gonna miss him very much. Lair himself joked, he said, I have als one question where they f did all that ice bucket money go? Michael Lair was forty four, And that’s your company news for today. Did you hear about the border collie who recycles trash and when he’s out on his walks, or how about the bear that stole so much Chick fil A?

But good News left the salad behind. Hi, I’m Johnny Mack, host of five Good News Stories. Don’t worry. I have stories about humans too, Like there’s a woman who makes a living because she looks like Jim Carrey. It’s my podcast.

It’s five Good News Stories, Five Good News Stories the number. Five good news stories twice a week. Five Good News Stories. Oh, and Shamrock shakes her back too, good News Five Good News Stories. Wherever you get your shows

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Full Transcript

The Shark deck. I can’t tell if Late Night has just gotten worse, or maybe the og writers have retired, or maybe the Trump era was just funnier. Late Night is in a slump high. I’m Johnny Mack with your Daily Comedy News. The topic Tom Brady’s lost the other night, and these are I’m tempted to not even do them, but I just want to illustrate that jokes have gone downhill.

Jimmy Fallon. The Cowboys knocked Tom Brady in the bucks out of the playoffs. Yeah, now fans want to know, will Tom Brady retire or retire? Then immediately unretire and that’s like the best of the jokes. Fouland again.

Yeah, after the game, Brady was thinking about retiring, but then he saw the price of eggs and was like, I can’t retire now, Jimmy Fallon again. I don’t know what else Brady wants to accomplish, though. It’s kind of like Jeff Bezos playing Mega millions. It’s like, you already have all the money, Let’s try Kimmel. He was seven and oh against Dallas lifetime.

Now he’s seven and one. Brady was reportedly so upset after the game, he ate a carb. No, one’s all right, Seth Meyers. According to a new reboard, three NFL teams are considering pursuing quarterback Tom Brady when he becomes a free agent, not to mention about a dozen Bocci leagues. Leslie Jones hosted The Daily Show.

We’re gonna get just a touch naughty here. So I try and keep the podcast clean, but I’m going to have to talk about what Leslie Jones talked about. So what did she talk about? And how can I keep it clean? All right?

Say you were really in love with a woman and you wanted to bring her great pleasure, and you would give her a kiss, maybe not on the mouth, like maybe somewhere else. You with me? Okay, that all right. We’re gonna use a code word. We’re gonna use a safe word together for this.

I’m looking at my water bottle. I’m just gonna say water bottle. She said something else to describe thing I just awkwardly tried to not describe you with me. Okay. My next question to you as you listen to this, is this what we want from the Daily Show?

Like, are you really going to hand Leslie Jones? The Daily Show and turn the Daily Show into this. Are you ready? Yes? She showed an image of the doctor Martin Luther King Junior statue that was unveiled in Boston the other day.

To just see this one. I don’t even know how to describe it. If you haven’t wanting to pass the podcast and google it. Okay, you’re back. Great.

Leslie Jones stared at the sculpture for a few seconds. And the sculpture is supposed to picked King and his wife Coreti Scott King in a loving embrace. Leslie Jones had one question for the audience, and here’s our code word coming up. Ready, has anyone in here ever been water bottle? That’s a pretty dirty joke for the Daily Show.

I’m not sure that’s what I want out of the Daily Show, she continued, because they’re celebrating you right now in Boston. Listen. I know doctor King went down in history, but this is not how you show it. Hey, she did a little word play there, then I’m not gonna at such. She then turned to a different camera to speak for a moment directly to any white people watching at home, and said, white people, you don’t need to say stuff about this statue.

You need to sit your ass in the back of the bus for this one. This is a civil rights icon.

And then she added water bottle his wife.

You show some damn respect. She then turns back to the first camera, puts her heads in her hands, and says, Okay, black people, what the f we’re gonna do? You know, it’s messed up when black people and the Proud Boys hate the same statue. See that’s a good joke. Do that.

She added, you know people hated the Eiffel Tower when it first went up. Maybe it’s just a matter of time, and in time we’ll see the statue for what really is Martin Luther king water bottle with his wife? She says, I can’t unsee it. Little too dirty from my taste. All right, this next topic Gutfeld.

I have been accused in the past of not talking about Gutfeld on this podcast. I like talking about Gutfeld. There’s just never any Gutfeld stories. You may recall the other day I told you CNN is thinking about getting into Late night, maybe hiring John Stewart, or in their wildest fantasy is Trevor Noah, who’s never gonna do it. I’ll tell you right now, there’s a better chance.

I’m serious here, I’m one series here. There is a better chance of Trevor Noah guest hosting this show that you’re listening to right now than doing the CNN show. And here’s why. If I got to Trevor Nooh and I was like, hey, you want to host Daily Comedy News. You can do it from your hotel room and I’ll have my staff clean it up.

You just got to risk some headlines for five eight minutes, there’s like the slightest chance that he would go that’s fun. Yeah, I’ll do that. There’s no chance he’s going to CNN and sitting in a desk for two hours, four nights a week, five nights week. Zero chance. Hey, Trevor, if you’re listening, I’ll be happy to take a week off if you want to do it anyway.

Gutfeld. He had an opinion piece on the Fox News website. I will read it to you, Gutfeld says. Turns out, thanks to the smashing success of this show, Gutfeld, which happened because of our awesome fans and my Razor wit and my Washboard abs. Other networks don’t want to hit comedy show of their own.

According to the new site Semaphore, CNN is reportedly considering higher comedian host one of it’s primetime shows. That makes sense. The network is still a joke. That’s mean. Apparently some floated names that included Bill mar Trevor Noir or Seneol Hall and John Stewart.

What Noah Lane Boosler, Elane Boosler, Elaine Boosler. I’m just going to say it, Elaine Boosler anyway, But if they really want comedy, they should relaunch Sann. Plus, that tobacco made me laugh far more than the Dead Crow staple to Chris Wallace’s scalp. But isn’t at the point. Really, CNN was already funny, and they went ahead and they nailed.

And I’m talking, of course about the golden aged comedy Chris Cuomo, Don Lemon, Brian Stelter or is there known in the business the Three Stooges? Those were the days, right, I’m sure he did this monologue better than I’m doing it now. Everything’s ruined. Chris lost his gig after trying to help his brother Andrew fend off a sexual harassment scandal, which is like having Alec Baldwin to teach you gun safety, all right, legitimate joke in there. Skipping ahead a little bit, he said Stetler, sadly for us, took time off to spend more time with his hogies.

Do you know he gave blood last week? That’s how they make Alfredo sauce so disgusting. I know it’s gross. Yeah. He then referenced Norm McDonald to see if I can dust off my Norm impression here, Guttfeld said, take the late great Norm McDonald.

After OJ Simpsons acquittala at ninety five, he said, well it’s officials. Finally if murder is legal in the state of California. The audience roared because they knew it was true, but they also laughed because Norm was saying something. He got the feeling he wasn’t supposed to say, Rumors World. That’s some execs at ABC didn’t want him doing OJ jokes.

Time out. If you want to just lmao, as the kids say, go on YouTube and type in Norm McDonald OJ jokes. There are montage of these things. They’re like forty minutes long, and it’s just Norm riffing OJ jokes and they’re fantastic. You know what, Now that I dusted off my half ass Norm McDonald impression.

Let’s go on lark. I have found on funny one one five dot com some Norm McDonald OJ jokes from February ninety five. Norm McDonald said is buck. Ojay Simpson says that he would have taken a bullet or stood in front of a train for Nicole Man. I’m going to tell you add of some bad luck when the one guy who would have died for you kills you.

That’s probably you don’t get worse luck than that. From January of that year, According to the National Transportation Safety Board, sleepy chuckers are responsible for one thousand deaths a year. In second place, O J. Simpson at two deaths a year. That was so funny.

I couldn’t keep a straight phase of reading it one more And the impression is very half ass. Today I’m aware I’m not nailing it. You don’t have to write me a letter. It was revealed today that OJ Simpson told police that Nicole Brown Simpson used to beat him up. He also claimed that chian Ron Goldman killed him.

There’s a lot of these, all right, This might be the new when I don’t have enough stories, filler thing that I do back to Gutfield. Take the late great norm MacDonald. After OJ simpsons acquittal in ninety five, he said, well, it’s official. It’s finally official. Murder is legal in the state of California.

The audience reared because they knew it was true, but they also laughed because Norma is saying something. You got the feeling was supposed to say. Rumors swirl that some execs at ABC didn’t want him doing OJ jokes. He was willing to break the rules to tell the truth, So how could a network do that while calling Mom’s pregnant people? In order to be effective at comedy, you’ve got to rely on truth, not ideology.

And then the next sentence, I’m going to share it, but it bothers me. This next sentence, I kind of don’t want to even verbalize it, but I want to share it because it think it gives you an overall picture of what Godfeld is doing. So I used to work at a big radio company that you’ve heard of and you’ve heard me mentioned. So when I was there, I would have the staff couple times a year. I’d get together and remind them of the rules.

You know, we were comedy channels, but we were trying to have fun, not insult people or not hurt people, and we’re always, always, always careful about hate speech, and I think this next thing I would have flagged for the staff and be like, don’t do that. What are you doing? Don’t do that? All right, I’m going to back up one sentence them going to read the thing that is chiming my bells Gudfeld. So how can a network do that while calling Mom’s pregnant people?

In order to be effective a comedy, you’ve got to rely on truth, not ideology. CNN is sort of trans in that way, meaning they identify as truthful. It’s a weird joke, Greg be better. Hey. You know how every now and then, I tell you, when I started this podcast, I thought I was going to talk about tours and how many specials and stuff, and then every day it seems to wind up in these horrible places.

Oh and there’s one more horrible story to come, but that’ll be in the second half of the podcast. Let’s do what I thought this podcast was going to be. Nate Burgatzy, He’s got a special coming out soon and the trailer is out. Nate Brigatzy’s Hello World will be released on Amazon January thirty. First, a new trailer for the special shows Nate in his elements.

He’s on a three hundred and sixty degree stage at the Celebrity Theater in Phoenix, Arizona. In the trailer, he tells the joke, I’m the firstborn. We show up. Our parents aren’t ready, they don’t have any money. The youngest just show up in Their parents are trillionaires.

It’s like what’s in upstairs. That’s like a home on top of a home. These special Wild tackled topics like growing up in the eighties and nineties, the hardest part of a marriage, and saying dumb things. And Madonna has released an homage to her nineteen ninety one film Truth or Dare. In this one, we see her playing a salacious round of the game Truth or Dare with some of the biggest and most current names in comedy.

Yes You’re right, that is weird. On is doing a music tour. It’s called the Celebration Tour. She has not become a stand up comic, but in her trailer for her music tour, we see Jack Black Judd appets how Amy Schumer, who once toured with Madonna and some more ALTI comics like Eric andre kpe Rollant, Larry Owens, Bob the Drea Queen, and Megan Statler. Let me talk about what’s going on behind the scenes of the podcast for about a minute.

If that boors, you skip ahead, So in the next few days you might encourage some weirdness. Maybe the feed doesn’t work for like an hour or so. What’s happening is the files are just moving from like that hard drive over there to this other hard drive over there. Why are you doing that, Johnny Mac, I have a deal where where how the commercials are handled are changing. The end goal of that, in full transparency, is so that this podcast can generate more money.

So it’s just moving from company A to company B and then hopefully a company B can sell more. They’re called host read, so it’s me reading the copy as opposed to say the commercial for the Casito that you hear nine times a show and thank you Casino. I really appreciate it. So you’ll start to hear more of that as time goes on, and as we moved the wires from here to there, something weird might happen in the next day or two. But if that does just you know, give it a beat and then come back and download the episode.

Should be fine, and then in a worst case scenario, your phone’s gonna download all previous episodes and you’re gonna want to kill me. Hopefully that doesn’t happen anyway. So that’s what’s going on there. Got a note from Kenny. Kenny is one of the og listeners of the show.

I’ve been listening for quite some time and a monthly member on buy Meacoffee dot com. We sometimes treat emails about coffee. He’s always trying to get me to go to that place with the green logo, and I always go to the national Donus chain. He told me at the Green place, I hear the new pistachio Cream cold brew as a hit this season. All right, I’ll stop by when I’m driving by.

Because Kenny buys me a coffee every month. Least I could do is honor his wishes and try the new pistachio Cream coldbrew. And if you’d like to support the show, like Kenny, go to Buy mea Coffee dot com slash Daily Comedy News and file the instructions on the screen. But the real reason for Kenny’s note is he told me he was listening to five good news Stories. So that’s the podcast they started right around Christmas time.

Low key. You’ve heard the promos at the end of this podcast of five good news stories. It’s five stories and they’re all kind of good news. While we’re backstage, let me tell you. So, I’m trying not to have the show devolve into, Hey, someone’s lost dog came home after six months.

There’s tons of those stories. They’re all great. I’m a big dog person, but I don’t want the podcast to be that every day. I also, I don’t want the podcast every day to be somebody was sick and now they’re not also great news, but I want the podcast to be varied. So I’m mixing in what we call in radio kicker stories.

So a kicker story is when I’m going back to the nineteen nineties when we actually used pieces of paper and stuff, so you would put together a package for your host of you know, here’s the stuff we could talk about today. And the kickers were things you could use or not depending on if you were running short or long. So if you’re running short, you could pull something out, you know, as a smile story is another way to call it and if you didn’t get to it, you didn’t get to it. Now, a lot of those are smiles stories. They’re not necessarily good news, but they’re quirky thing Like there’s one in an upcoming episode of Five Good News Stories about a guy who ordered every topping from a local pizza chain, so he got like a pizza with everything on it, like I mean everything.

So it’s that good news. I don’t know, but it’s fun. So that’s that show Five Good News Stories where if you get your podcast. And he was asking me if Travel is back, we’ll have another season. Yes it will.

I’ve mentioned I have some upcoming travel. On the upcoming travel I’m going to record a whole bunch of things. Got a cool little trip coming up. So those are the podcasts Five Good News Stories and Travel is Back. Those are some other things that I do.

I’m also the Right Around Palace Intrigue and we’ve had a great month, all right. Today the snow Jam Comedy Festival kicks off. Let’s see who’s playing, you know, the snow Jam Comedy Festival. It’s in Sioux Falls, South Dakota. It’s it’s eighth year.

Early in the day, Dan Bublitz, friend of the show, comedian and dude who I’m working on this partnership with. He’s hosting building a Better ePK for your success. That’s at the Spellbound Magic Shop in theater if you’re not in the is And ePK is an electronic press kit. That’s pretty cool. I gotta have Dan on one of these days.

That topic interests me a lot. Dan listens every day. Dan, let’s talk on the side about that. Six thirty PM. Tonight Remedy at Frostbite Comedy Good Name Tonight, six thirty Remedy At six eleven.

Ten comics hit the stage, including Lisa Rossi. So Snowjam army with these bios. So let’s just randomly. I haven’t pre read this, I scam did I looked at the homework. Don’t send me a note, Dan, I did look at it.

I didn’t memorize it. I like doing these things cold. You know that. So Lisa Rossi is one of the performers. She explores the mysteries of marriage, Midwestern life, and why she loves shorten a and French fries so much.

See that’s fun. She’s also played the Omaha Comedy Festival Laugh Riot in La and the name of a comedy festival in New Orleans. I can’t even pronounce. See who else is on that show. Jenny lou Roussy Warner in Ohio Brood in Alaska is her bio.

She began her career at Pierce Street Annex and Alaska Honeder Comedy Chops at the Cleveland imperorv recent winner of the Rivercade Comedy Competition. Credits include real stories of the Highway Patrol. So that’s a six thirty show, and I like a nice early six thirty show, all right, So that’s today ten comics. Then at nine o’clock we let it snow Comedy Showcase, ten more comedians. I love ten comedian shows.

Noah cop fur Let’s check out his bio. He has two specials out on YouTube that’s cool, a full hour titled Deep Breaths and a mini special produced by Don’t Tell Comedy. He’s one of the ten. So is mel Mackie. Melanie Mackie is a quote overwhelming ball of energy from Des Moines.

She used this comedy to pursue her constant need for a tension. I’m digging it. With a background in theater, improv, cheerleading, and gymnastics and a full time job planning weddings. She just wants everyone to have a good time. So that shows at nine snow Jam Comedy Festival.

You guys are bringing it. I mean for me, I meet my buddies at like five, we’d grab a beer or two. Hit the six thirty show. Ten comics dropt down, some notes. Hit a nine o’clock show.

Ten different comics dropped down, some notes. Go back to the room, knock out a podcast, My kind of comedy festival. Nice job, Snowjam Comedy Festival. I’m running along today, all right. Joe Rogan, he’s at the Creek in the Cave in Austin tonight.

He’s also the guest on this week’s Kill Tony. I haven’t listened to that yet, but I have. It’s saved for a long drive I have coming up. Hey, remember the other day it’s talking about Justin Royland. He’s one of the creators of Rick and Morty and Solar Opposites in Koala Man.

That guy. It’s also the voice of Rick and the voice of Morty. So if you like Rick and Morty, he’s kind of cruised to that show. So do the other day that it came out that he was charging twenty twenty with one count of domestic battery with corporal injury and one count of false imprisonment by menace, violence, fraud, or deceit. The Hollywood Reporter picked up the story.

Royland’s attorney called the media coverage of the charge’s inaccurate, adding to be clear, not only is just an innocent but we have every expectation that this matters on course to be dismissed once the District Attorney’s office has completed its methodical review of the evidence from what I gathered. The point of the hollywo Reporter’s article was to observe that Adult Swim has so far declined to comment on the news, adding the show isn’t even halfway through a seventy episode order. Commissioned by the channel in twenty eighteen. The series is consistently the most watched on Adult Swim. There recently completed sixth season average five hundred and sixty thousand viewers for its initial airings.

Meanwhile, on Hulu, Royland plays a main character on Solar Opposites. I’ve actually been workshopping a half ass corvo impression. I’ve almost gotten down. I got to nail the voice little more. But I’ve figured out how you do a corvo.

If you watch Solar Opposites, it’s basically rant, rant on same topic and then a left turn. So it would be like, and I don’t have the voice yet, but it would be like if he were complaining about AstroTurf and baseball, it would be something along the lines of why don’t they play on real grass? And why is the grass green anyway? And whatever happened all Star voting. I liked punching those ballots that, but I don’t have the voice yet.

Not a half half impressions today should just finish up as half ass Jeff Foxworthy. Royland also executive produces and does voice work on Koala Man. He also has a video game company. My son turned me onto. The company is called Squatch Games, and they put out this game in December.

It’s on Xbox Game Pass, which is how I got it. Yes, I’m a big kid. It’s called High on Life. It’s a first person shooter, but it is l O l LMAO, like truly truly funny. So you’re holding a gun, but your gun speaks to you, and the gun speaks to you in ninety nine percent the Morty voice.

The humor is very Rick and Morty. Aid’s basically a Rick and Morty game. But you know, totally not totally legally to stink, this isn’t Rick and Morty at all. What are you talking about? One of those?

The game is a lot of fun. It’s called High on Life. You’ll find out on Xbox Game Pass. It’s seriously funny. Can I spoil a little bit of it?

All right? I’m gonna spoil the games good, bad, thirty seconds. I’ll do it real quick. Spoiler. So, at one point during the game, your character gets a computer virus and like fake ads keep popping up on your screen, so you’re trying to shoot stuff but you can’t see because there’s ads.

Very funny spoiler over all, Right, we’re too long today. That’s your companies for today. Follow the show for free on Apple, podcast, Spotify, YouTube, wherever you get your shows tomorrow. Did you hear about the border collie who recycles trash and when he’s out on his walks, or how about the bear that stole so much Chick fil A but good News left the salad behind. Hi.

I’m Johnny Mack, host of five good news stories. Don’t worry. I have stories about humans too, Like there’s a woman who makes a living because she looks like Jim Carrey. It’s my podcast. It’s five good news stories, five good news stories the number.

Five good news stories twice a week. Five good news stories. Oh, and Shamrock shakes her back too, good news. Five good news stories. Wherever you get your shows

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Full Transcript

The Shark Deck. Hey Jenny Mack with your Daily Comedy News. Quick joke from Mark Norman, who said the book of Henry Ford’s life, Now that’s an autobiography. Chelsea Handler hosted the Critics Choice Awards. She said, the cast of The Bear is here.

Awesome show. They showed us how grueling and absolutely miserable working in the restaurant industry can be. And they didn’t even have to wait on James Gordon. It’s not good. None of these are good.

She joked about badass Viola Davis training for her critically acclaimed to film The Woman King her joke. As part of Viola’s training in the film, she was given a DNA test to determine the best workout regiment for her genetic makeup or right Good premise, which also coincidentally revealed that she’s Nick Cannon’s daughter. That was pretty good. Actually, when I first read it, I didn’t like it. Now I’m like, all right, that joke’s pretty good.

And the movie tsar Kate Blanchett portrayed iconic lesbian whose career is affected by her toxic behavior, and she didn’t even have to host her own daytime talk show. All right, Dummer became the third highest viewed show on Netflix, with a combined watch time of one billion hours, which apparently is the same amount of time we’re going to have to listen to Prince Harry talk about his frostbitten penis. You know what I warmed up to those? I apologized, Chelsea. Those were good jokes.

And don’t forget if you want to talk about Prince Harry’s penis palace intrigue. Wherever you get your shows, that’s a podcast about the royal family. I’m the writer. Check it out. This next one.

I kind of get it, and I’m kind of like you guys are dreaming here. CNN boss Chris Licht is contemplating adding some sort of like comedy type show to CNN from nine to eleven pm every week night. This from Radar Online. One insider said they’re looking for their version of John Oliver. Okay, again, not the worst idea.

Two hours a night is a lot, and here’s their wish list. John Stewart, Bill Maher, Trevor Noah and Arsenio Hall. All Right, first off, let’s cross off Trevor Noah. Trevor Noah did not give up the Daily Show to do two hours a night on CNN. No chance, Arsenio.

I could see that happening, because what else is our Senio doing John Stewart? Is John Stewart going to host the news for two hours on CNN every night? And what happens when you know something horrible happens and John Stewart’s on the air, is you’re going to have to suddenly be the anchor guiding us through the horrible storm, plane crash, terrible thing. I don’t know hard division Bill Maher, I could actually see Bill Moore doing it, although same issue of what happens when the bad stuff happens? Do you like have Anderson Cooper just hang around eleven o’clock every night in case he needs to throw him on the air?

To Bill Maher might make sense because he already works for Warner Brothers Discovery, the parent company of CNN. Billmore has the show on HBO. I could see that happening. But again, does Bill Moore want to work ten hours a week plus the prep? You know, you don’t just show up at eight fifty nine and sit down.

Joe Rogan says it is time to forgive Will Smith. He said, thinking about the situation, I’m like, that guy has to be forgiven, Like he clearly has deep remorse for what he’s done, and he’s also clearly living in a world where he was given nothing but adulation and praise for most of his life, and then all of a sudden he has this one, in many people’s eyes, unforgivable moment where he does something just so stupid. He’s a human being. You just got to forgive him, you know. And I think the person who has to forgive him if he wants to is Chris Rock.

Sam Murel compted it on Dave’s Chappelle and said, you know, the guy who attacked Dave Rappelle. That was awful. But when people were talking about Dave being silence, I’m like, I feel like Netflix is one week away from live streaming him taking a dump. I think it’s much to do about nothing. What are we talking about here, He’s not being silenced.

He’s performing an arena’s it’s the narrative of the shock jocks us. Oh, they’re coming for us. I’m like, why don’t you show them where you live? You’re not canceled. Mike Epps was down to Jackson, Mississippi, trying to bring attention to the water problems down there.

Before entertaining a crowd in a weekend comedy show, Mike Apps handed out water to Jacksonians and said, it’s no laughing matter, and the rest of the country don’t understand how bad it is to come here and see how resilient these people are here in Jackson. Jackson’s always been a great city in America, and I think as a country, in a government, we need to support them. Philadelphia Weekly had somebody at one of Mike Epps shows, presumably the one in Philadelphia, not Jackson. They write, Though Epps is now drug free quote save for weed unquote, his cocaine days are regarded with fondness and fearlessness. Not only did he joke about being coked up while filming movies like All about the Benjamin’s his joke there look at my eyes, he poked fun at the women in his life during his cocaine habit, and post cocaine you could tell I was on the powder by the look of the woman I was with at the time.

There was a lot of reminiscing and recollection within the body of Mike epps long set, and much of it tied to similarly misogynistic, but funny and certainly self deprecating elements of his nineteen nineties and earlies two thousands past. Women approach him differently now than they did in his comedic youth. The children he has with self damed baby mom as approach aps differently too. One more day until the snow Jam Comedy Festival January nineteenth through the twenty first in Sioux Falls, South Dakota. Let’s take a look at some of the comedians who will be performing.

Shiloh Blake is out of Minneapolis. She was a finalist in the twenty twenty two Funniest Person With a Day Job House of Comedy. Billy Joe Gillespie is an out and proud marine veteran, bringing high end and a unique perspective to the stage. For eleven years, her hilarity has kept the crowds laughing at the adventures of farm life, the challenges of military service, and veteran life as a woman. Christian Williams handed in this bio On a cold night December nineteen ninety four, a little round mound of chocolate was born by the name Christian Williams.

Christian then slowly grew into an average sized chocolate man who’s also an improv and stand up comedian. His humor can be described as lighthearted and silly. I love it Coldy Ulrich during comic from Denver. Cody hosts the wipe athetical podcast Nice So that kicks off tomorrow the snow Jam Comedy Festival Shoe Fall, South Dakota. Looking forward to this one got a nice note on the Daily Comedy News subreddit.

Tall Wrongdoer forty two ninety nine wrote, thanks Johnny Mack, and I was like, oh, I’ll click on this. The tall Wrongdoer writes, I’m your age and like stand up specials an awful lot. But when I watched the classics from Ourage generation, I often get the side eye from my kiddos. Times change comedy changes all good. I’ll jump in here.

Yeah, why don’t you put on Eddie Murphy’s Delirious and play his opening bit? You know the one that’s titled on the album A word that starts with F. Play that one that one has an age So well, times change comedy changes all good at your recommendation. I watched Cheng Wang and otsko Akosco with them and both were hits. So thanks for helping me find comics the Bridge the generation gap and made us all laugh.

That’s awesome. Thanks Tall Wrongdo. I really appreciated that. Note there anybody in Manchester if you’re in Manchester wanting your head on over to Bert Kreisher’s show tonight. By the way, fantastic Bert Kreischer article in The Guardian.

I’m saving that for the weekend so I can record the weekend in advance, but I did share it on the subredits Daily Comedy News and on the Daily Comedy News podcast group. You’ll find that on Facebook if you want to read that, or just you know, google Bert Kreisher and the Guardian article will pop up anyway. He’s in Manchester in the UK. Tonight Chortle Rights the US Party. Ging comedian and podcaster Bert Kreisher, known for performing shirtless on stage, begins a short run of UK dates at his new Tops Off World tour at the Apollo The stand Up.

Is also known for hosting the Go Big Show featuring large scale entertainment such as monster Trucks on America’s TBS network. I’ll tell you as the host of Daily Communus, he’s not known for that. It might be something on his resume. It might be something he does, it might be something you even watch, but he is not known for that. Night Court It’s back.

Did you watch it? I didn’t really watch the first one, so I’m not going to watch the reboot. But the Hollywood Reporter did, and they wrote, over its nine season one hundred ninety three episode run, you know, you see a number like one hundred ninety three episodes, and now we’re living in the twenty twenties where seasons are like eight episodes long. The idea of a show having one hundred ninety three two hundred episodes is insane. But over its nine season, one hundred ninety three episode run, NBC’s Night Court the original had many things going for at the Manhattan courtroom setting presented an array of cases that let the show shift from the outlandish to the topical, the ridiculous to the borderline sincere.

One thing it didn’t have going for it was consistency. The broad humor could veer in a hackiness, the attempts at candor could strain to mawkishness. Shifts within the sporting castment that the writers were constantly trying, not always successfully, to taylor new parts to new actors, knowing they could always beat behind John Laraquett and punchlines and Harry Anderson in screen time. The inconsistency was especially pronounced. I’ve experienced Night Court.

If so many viewers did, primarily in syndication, one episode would lead you to think this is one of the best shows of its era, and the X would be pure drivel. All right, what about the new one? The Holli reporter says. The new one swings back and forth between somewhat promising and thoroughly embalmed. It’s part of the joke that Abby, Abby’s the judge now, and what a coincidence.

She’s the daughter of Harry Anderson’s character. What a coincidence. She’s taking up residence in a facility that hasn’t been renovated in decades, which lets her occupy what is basically her father’s old office and preside over what is basically her father’s old courtroom, producing all sorts of visual references to the original series for a fittingly nostalgic blandness. The writers have generally picked new cases which would fit in with the old, like the woman who insists she’s a werewolf, but more frequently. The cases here are used to make character driven points, like various times Abbet’s hambur early worries she might be too soft or sentimental, only to be reminded that sentiment is her family’s core judicial superpower.

All right, let’s finish up on gossip corner. Olivia Munn and John Mulaney. They have a son, Malcolm. They treated Malcolm to his first trip to a local Asian market. We learned this from Olivia Mun’s Instagram.

She shared a video decaption first trip to the Asian market. The Daily Mail writes the X Men Apocalypse star forty two years old, stepped out with her boys, looking fabulous in skin spe blue jeans at a red sweater. The pant’s had a freed high water style that help show off her black heeled boots. At one point, young Malcolm mun mulaney turned and pointed to the various fish and shellfish that had already been packed and put on ice. How cute.

That’s your comedy news for today. Fall the show for free on Apple, podcast, Spotify, YouTube, wherever you get your shows. See you tomorrow,

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Full Transcript

The Shark Deck. Hey, I’m Jenny Mack with your Daily Comedy News quick one from Seth Myers. This reminds me of an old Letterman style joke, Seth said. According to a new book, then President Trump discussed in twenty seventeen the possibility of striking North Korea with a nuclear weapon and then blaming it on another country. Even weirder, he wanted to blame it on Belgium.

Now I pictured Dave mocking for the camera and Paul Schaeffer doing a musical sting there.

Let’s talk about Velma.

I’m wondering if Mindy Kaling has actually done damage to her career. Velma is not being received well at all, like at all. I’m recording on Sunday to commodate my schedule. I had some traveler yesterday. I’m on rotten tomatoes.

From critics, Velma has a fifty three percent rating from viewers seven percent, and there are quite a few articles from the marys dot com. The headline what is Vilma with this awful means huge joke? The mary Sue dot com writes, Vilma the HBO Ma’s adult cartoon about the best detective and mystery ink seems to pride itself on having a more adult, cynical take on the gang of teenage crime solvers. However, that adults in nature has led to some horrifically tasteless jokes. In the second episode, Velma makes a truly bizarre comment to Daphne, claiming, I spit the truth without a filter, like every comedian before me too.

The Mary Sue writes genuinely, what the hell? I will try to be fair to the series, it does seem that this version of Velma is meant to be self involved, the judgmental to the point of short sidness. The early episodes established Velma as the type of girl who’s not like the other girls and who gets challenged when she and Daphne rekindle their friendship. The line also occurs in the middle of a discussion when Daphney accuses Vilma of believing her snap judgments of other people who always be correct, meaning that much like those supposed truth spinning comedians, Velma is not acknowledging other people’s experiences because they don’t fit into her personal perception of the truth. But that line seems designed almost entirely for shock value, with almost no self awareness.

Or acknowledgement of how out there it is. It’s hard to imagine how it appeals to anyone other than people who are still fans of Louis C.K. To be honest, though, that also summarizes the show, which appears to be going through an identity crisis regarding whether it wants to be an edgy adult take on the characters of Scooby Doo or genuine exploration of those characters flaws. Forbes headline is Vilma is so bad it spawned PSI up conspiracy theories. Velma currently has the lowest audience score I’ve seen for an HBO or HBO Max production, a seven percent.

To get that low requires not just review bombing, but your show also likely has to be genuinely bad, and it is. Vilma is very, very bad. Forbes rights, Velma is so bad, in fact, that it’s spawning conspiracy theories that creator Mindy Kaling made what is essentially a parody of what the right wing thinks left wing comedy is like, as in a show that not just recast most roles with new races, but also features loads and loads of white guys am I right jokes. The idea is that Kaling is a secretly conservative force in media, trying to make the Left look bad by making a cringey adult cartoon full of this rich white guy has a small dung jokes that the right can point too. Is everything wrong with race created, social justice influenced media.

Velma is not defensible by any stretch of the imagination. It’s just bad. I love this from Forbes. Making progressive jokes is fine as long as the jokes are good. They’re not good.

I heard the show describes somewhere as a series written by TV writers who only ever talk to other TV writers. There’s a world where this concept might have worked. I can see an adult Scooby Doo series where you just have an overlooked Velma attempting to clawback credit from a privileged Fred, the leader of the gang. And yet here it’s not just jabbing a Fred for being an overconfident white dude. It’s literally he’s such a whiny white man baby that his mommy cuts a steak and he hasn’t finished puberty.

Ce is a small penis like just no remote hint of subtlety or nuance or anything that can make the progressive humor work. The Scottish Daily Express went with Scooby Doo spinoff Vilma isn’t funny and is openly racist against white people. Wow. They write, the one white member of the gang, Fred seems to always be the butt of the joke. In one clip, Velma publicly humiliates him based on his class and race.

We’re then shown Fred hilariously failing to cut food using a knife and fork, because who’s ever heard of an upper class white person being able to use cutlery? That was the exact scene that made me bail on the show. I was kind of in the first eight nine minutes and when they got to that, I was like, I hate the show and I’m never going back. Seems like I’m not alone. These Scottish Daily Express rights the basic premise of the humor doesn’t make any sense, part from an adherence to the white man bad mantra of wokeism.

At one point, Velma slips him a copy of the feminine Mystique and inspires his great awakening and new obsession with the gender pay gap. Classic cartoon laughs. Glenn Howarden said, clearly a big part of the show is the sad’s heart of it, and I just think that Fred was just a perfect vehicle to satirize white mail, entitlement, privilege, all things that are part of the social conversation right now. I think he was just too perfect of a vessel not to do that. It’s not really the thread that we know, but I think you can look at the thread that we grew up with and go, I can see how that guy used to be that guy.

I also saw an industry trade observed that HBO Max didn’t pre promote the show. Remember I mentioned last week like, hey Velma suddenly out. I didn’t miss something. They didn’t promote it at all. They were just like, oh yeah, Velma’s out today.

So it seems like HBO Max knows that they have a dud on their hands. Over the weekend. It was prominently featured when I logged in, But I don’t know. It doesn’t look like this one’s too popular. John Mulaney is in Belfast.

Tonight short all went with this line which caught my attention. Belfast classy American comedian John Mulaney, the former SnO writer with several acclaim stand up socialistic name is John Mulaney Classy. He dresses nice because these are short haircuts because they add the show plays against the positive, easy going image he had, at least until his marriage publicly collapsed as he began dating actress Olivia Munn with dark stories of drug addiction and rehabilitation. I’m not saying he’s not classy. I just classy isn’t the first word that comes to mind for me?

With John Mulaney again, yell at me in the comments, I’m fine.

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Also overseas Bert Craisher, he was spotted alongside Connor McGregor in Conn…

Connor owns the Black Forge Inn. Graisher had just played The Three Arena in Dublin popped on over to the Black Forge. They took a picture together. And get out your Daily Comedy News bingo card because I’m going to talk about Andrew Santino again. He was on Joe Rogan’s podcast.

He was asked about his views on Live Golf. You know this is the controversial rival golf tour that the Saudis are behind. Santino told Rogan love it, absolutely love it. He understands that people love the preservation in the history of the PGA tour, but his take the PGA particularly is mad because they’re looking something in the face that’s threatening them. They’re more mad about business interests.

Santino says the PGA tour doesn’t appeal to the younger players. I want some more freedom and fun. I want something different. He loves the idea of a competing golf tour and said, why do you need a monopoly of one league. As much as he loves to live golf, he says, it’s not going to be bigger than a PGA, but it’s an alternative that’s fun.

Nola dot Com caught up with Sam Morrell and they talked about the two times Sam left Tulane University. The first was right after he arrived on campus for his freshman year. It was days before a hurricane Katrina. Sam said, that was my introduction to New Orleans immediate evacuation. He went up spending that semester New York City.

I went to Columbia that semester. I wore my Tulane hat and everybody was like, you poor thing. I was like, really, I just took a flight out that got me way more sex than I deserved to get as a freshman. The second time he left, he transferred to Nyu that was less about a degree, but he wanted to get into comedy. He said, there was no stand up in New Orleans.

There was one open mic. It wasn’t a place I could grow, So it was hard for me. I had a strong feeling that I wanted that there was one open mic, but it wasn’t a place I could grow. The article also has a good point about how Sam puts together his comedy. They talked about a bit Sam has about sleeping Beauty not being all that appropriate on the concept of consent.

Sam says, I’m on the right side if you want to break that joke down. That joke was just another one, Like just go on the ride with me. There’s a lot of punch lines along the way if I’m going anywhere that’s in some people’s eyes, pretty offensive. I go really silly with it. When people say they’re dark jokes, to me, they’re light.

Maybe the subject matter is dark, but I’m going light with it. You have half an ounce of whiskey and then like six ounces of seltzer. A lot of this is about placement of jokes. Maybe that joke is shocking, so I have to earn it and put that fifteen minutes into my set. I’m sick of doing fifteen minute comedy sets in New York at the Cellar.

The first five minutes I have to prove that I’m funny. Then I get in the groove. Then at minute nine I try a new joke and I lose them. He prefers performing on the road because he gets to do an hour instead of doing four fifteen minute sets. The snow Jam Comedy Festival kicks off Thursday night.

Thirty comedians from around the country are traveling to Sioux Falls, South Dakota. Of what the forecast is, let’s look Thursday high of twenty four, low of fourteen Friday twenty four and thirteen, Saturday twenty six and seventeen. I guess not too bad. Some of the comedians performing there. Lee bruns Lee is a reformed motorcycle addict, special Olympics coach, a longtime fan of both dogs and cats.

His humor comes from a perspective of exhaustion and deep regret. Stephen Taylor is going to be there. He was from Louisiana moved to Kansas City to escape his traditional Southern roots. He’s a fast rising talent who’s worked with Theo von Carlos Miller and Mark Norman, combining his unique perspective with some sweet Southern charm. Stephen headlines and features of your favorite clubs, bars, and colleges across the country.

Thomas Nichols will be there. He’s out of Dallas. He jokes about everything from cartoons to politics to pineapple. Fanta. Is there Pineapple Fanta?

I toward Spain a few years back. I really got into Fanto when I was over there, Like orange Fanto was my joke. Yeah, Fanta Pineapple two eighty nine on door Dash? Should I order one dollar seventy four at Walmart? I’m on Fanta dot com now and they say Fanta Pineapple.

It’s a bold, confident never settle flavor high score you do you and don’t apologize for leveling up your eight bit love of pineapple things. It’s caffeine free and it’s pineapple flavored. Other Fanta flavors Greepe, Pina Colota, strawberry, and orange. This is not a commercial. I’m just telling you about comedian Thomas Nichols.

He’s out of Dallas, and he jokes about everything from cartoons to politics too. Pineapple Fanta sweet snow Jam Comedy Festival. January nineteenth through the twenty first Let’s a Gossip Corner, Olivia Munn was on Instagram. She shared some adorable footage of her and John Mulaney’s baby son, Malcolm. They’re eating Grandma Kim’s homemade ramen.

Malcolm appeared in Oz he watched John Laney spice up his ramin bowl with a gooey red chili sauce and also on Gossip Corner. Celest bar is an Australian comedian who has gained worldwide fame and nine point four million followers on Instagram thanks to her hilarious body positive post comparing herself to other women in the entertainment industry. She did a photoshoot from Marie Claire. She’s on the cover of the February issue. She revealed on Instagram she shot the photos while having a broken tailbone, joking.

In the caption She’s professional, we see Barbara leaning against a beach ball and standing on a paddleboard holding on a trapeze rings no details on how she broke her tailbone, and some of Northern Ireland’s top comedians are going to quote knock the ballocks out of each other in a charity boxing event. Pattie McDonald, Mickey Bartlett and Shane sod are among the comics taken to the ring and the Valentine’s Day Massacre Ulster Hall February eleventh. It follows a similar event in twenty sixteen when English based comics took part in a series of bouts. And there’s something over there called the wrestling where apparently comedians wrestle. They’re going to do a version of that at Just for Laughs.

In March, Kyle Humphreys told the Belfast tele Graft they’ve been inspired by YouTuber Jake Paul’s boxing. He said the stand up scene is really well sported here, but seeing people out of their comfort zone, which we all are, just add something different. After the bell we can share a joke, but in the ring, in the heat of the battle, there’s no time for that. That’s your comedy needs for today. Father show for free on Apple, Podcasts, Spotify, YouTube, wherever get your shows.

See tomorrow. Hello. I Am Mark Francis, host of a daily podcast about the British royal family called Palace Intrigue. Did you see what Megan Michael did in her latest documentary or what Prince Harry said in his new book, Well, the Kings and queens, and princes and princesses are ready to explode. Andrew is ready to implode.

Royal sources are jumping at the bit. The in laws just can’t stop. The UK tabloids are about to burst, Americans can’t get enough, the kids can’t get any cute to the press can’t get any uglier. And Wills and Kate, well, they just wonderful. Get your daily dose of gossip and news from the world’s most royal family.

Follow Palace Intrigue on Apple Podcasts, YouTube, or wherever you get your shows.

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Full Transcript

The Shark Deck. Hey, I’m Jenny Mack with your Daily Comedy News late Night. Still having fun with President Biden and those passkey documents. Seth Myers with a winner here. The White House announced that President Biden’s aids found classified documents at several locations inside his Delaware home, and he’s had them for a while because a lot of them have to do with the Louisiana purchase.

That’s great. There’s a bunch of bad ones again, as always, I’ll qualify the professional comedians tell them much better than I do. But I don’t know what is going on with the writers. Colbert, I know your retirement age. Are you starting a collection?

They’re classified documents, not spoons from the Delaware Train Museum. That one’s okay. James Cordon, this is awful. You’ve heard of Mara Lago. This is Carlago.

Oh my goodness’s terrible fallon. Apparently presidents lose classified documents the way we lose air pods. It’s just terrible. Unless that’s like the ninth joke in his sequence Kimmel one, okay one awful, the okay one, which is more dangerous. Joe Biden having classified documents in his garage or Joe Biden having the keys to a Corvette’s That one’s okay.

This one’s awful. He calls it stud force one. Kimbell, that one’s so bad. I’m surprised, Falandon say it. From Tampa Bay Date Night Guide, Boy, Jenny Mack, you’ve been just throwing fire these last three four or five shows.

Yes, I know. By the way, I’m recording this on Friday, and I got a note from a friend of the show who told me that he knows the guy. If you listen. On Friday, there was an article about a comedian and I’m not here, and I wasn’t there to beat up on that particular comedian. It was just that the article had a lot of comedian generalities, like, hey, Springfield has the best audiences, and the Chuckle Hut is the best club.

Was that kind of stuff. Friend of the show told me he was LMAO about that piece. So that’s good because the point wasn’t to pick on the particular comedian. And that’s why I’m saying particular comedian’s name today. That’s not why I did it.

So thank you friend of the show. From Tampa Bay Day Night Guide. You’re home for a comedy news They say Jim Gaffigan has been a household name. Now I wonder why they say has been a household name. I would say Jim Gaffigan is a household name, except he’s probably not.

I mean for you and I. You listen to the show every day, and how was the show? We know who Jim Gafgan is. I’m not sure everyone knows a Jim Gaffican is, but who cares? And he’s bringing his latest tour, the Dark Pail Tour, to Tampa February ninth through the eleventh.

Not only will guests be treated to his hilarious antics about dealing with life’s crazy challenges. See this just to beat the dead horse. That’s the same kind of generic comedy article that I was making fund of on Friday, Jim Gaffigan’s hilarious antics and dealing with life’s crazy challenges. But one of the story, Johnny mac is Those two shows will be filmed for Jim Gaffigan’s newest upcoming comedy special. Nice, the CEO of the building, said, I love Jim Gaffigan’s work and his comedy interesting.

He must be a fan of Jim’s acting traps to put it in that order. I’m so impressed that he’s chosen to film the Dark Pail Tour here. It speaks for who these strass is, the stras is the building. Then we got some boilerplate from Jim, let’s read it. I’m super excited that I’m filming in Tampa because of a couple of factors.

You know, I’ve obviously performed in Tampa numerous times and always had a great time. But I also feel like Western Florida has a lot of Midwesterners, and so being a Midwesterner, there’s a feeling of familiarity there too.

Also, I lived in Tampa for a year after college.

Some far from an expert on Tampa, but I know a little bit. I was in some apartment complex that was on South Bay Shore, So what’s this set like. It’s a little darker than some of my previous materials, But I think audiences like that. You know, you develop a relationship with people that come to shows, and you know the expectation that’s going to be funny, and you know that’s the most important thing, but also that it evolves. It’s not the same joke from pr Newswire Dateline Ambu Zambe United Arab Emirates.

Kevin Hart CIO of Yes Island Yas Island has just announced that applications are upen to the public for the world’s best job. Are you’re curious what does Kevin harts and it’s that Kevin Hart. Yes. What does Kevin Hart Cio Yas Island say the world’s best job is? According to this press release, Well, the world’s best job is a chance to become Yes Island Abu Dhabe’s next ambassador.

The chosen candidate, if deemed heartworthy, stands a chance to win an unbeatable package including a one hundred thousand dollars salary. Now salary is in quotes, So I don’t know. I guess you’re just winning and you don’t have to do anything. A hundred thousand dollars salary, a luxury hotel stay, exclusive world class entertainment experiences across the Yes Island Abu Dhabe and much more. You dear listener, can apply right now, go to hire me dot Yes Island dot com.

A jury will select a shortlist of five entrance by January twenty six, says the press release. Those keen to be shortlisted will simply need to film and upload a video of themselves and answer one simple question, how will you make Yes Island heart to beat? That’s heart to beat Yes. To increase their chances, applicants are advised to share and upload their savvy submissions on social media. Hmm, I’m no expert in contest rules, but I’d run that one pass somebody if it were me.

But I’m not running the contest. I’m just reading a press release with no shortage of exhilarating experiences in store Yas Island, Abu Zabe promises the winner one hundred thousand dollar prize to start. In addition to a business class flight to Abu Dhabe, the winner will get to call the fabulous Suite at w Abu Dhabe Yas Island home for sixty days and have access to delightful spa and dining experiences at the coveted hotel. To get around the island, the Ambassador will ride in style in a luxury car courtesy of Yasa Marina Circuit. The winner will be able to satisfy their need for speed through karting sessions and the Formula Yas three thousand driving experience on the world famous Formula one track.

What’s more, the winner, we’ll see the sixty day club membership at Yasa Links golf package complete with golfing sessions to help perfect their swing. This is not a commercial. This isn’t me actually doing the story because I’m amused by it. From New Jersey twelve, a video of a man throwing a full can of beer at a comedian in Point Plaisant Beach went viral last fall. Remember that, Yeah, you remember that well.

The person who threw the beer at comedian Amoriel Elias was fined five hundred and eight dollars. I wonder why it’s five hundred and eight five hundred and eight dollars, and has also been banned from the club. New Jersey twelve says besides losing club access, the person in question may have lost some friends from the stunt. According to a handwritten letter sent to Uncle Vinny’s, the letter reads, in part that poor Coma could have been in the hospital of coma disgusting behavior. We will never hang with them again.

The owner of Uncle Vinni’s, whose Dino Abelli, said, we got a bunch of anonymous letters in the mail. One really hit me hard. It was like, we were there that night with him. We’ll never go out with him again. He gave me his name, his address.

Oh snitches in New Jersey. I watched TV. I want no part of this. We’re moving on and this next story sucks. Justin Royland, co creator of Rick and Morty, is reportedly facing domestic battery charges.

This story is breaking as a record this on Friday. NBC News says the chargers are stemming from a twenty twenty incident that started in January. The initial criminal complaint being filed in May. Jane Doe, a pseudonym, is charging Royland with one felony count of domestic battery with corporal injury and one felony count of false imprisonment by menace of violence, fraud, and or deceits. Royland is the co creator of Rick and Morty.

He voices Rick. He is also the voice of Corvo on Solar Opposites. He’s also one of the creators of Kowala Man that debuted on Hulu last week and I watched the first episode and made it ten minutes in and was like, Eh, Snowjam Comedy Festival coming up January nineteenth through the twenty first Have you been this Snowjamcomedyfest dot com slash sponsors You should if you go down. It’s a pretty snazzy logo. They’re under the Bronze sponsors right next to Experienced to Fall.

South Dakota and the Dave Holly Tour is a go for Daily Comedy News. That’s right. I’m one of the sponsors of the snow Jam Comedy Festival. Why aren’t you going? Kicks off on Thursday?

You want to go? Snowjam Comedy Festival back for its eighth year, The vice president of the board, Emily Wilson said, South Dakota in January. You must be joking, No, we aren’t. You’re gonna laugh your snow pants off. I’m more snow pants in a long time.

When’s the last time more snow pants? I guess when I went to Iceland. Iceland is awesome. You’re gonna laugh your snow pants off, but you won’t feel the cold because your heart will be so warm. Tickets ten to twenty five bucks, Gold and Platinum three day all access passes range from fifty to seventy five dollars.

Jackie Kation is this year’s headliner, and as we get later, into the week. I’ll start talking about the individual shows and I’ll do the Hey, if I were there, what show would I attend? So, Johnny Mack, if you’re talking up the snow Jam Comedy Festival, how coming you’re not going? Here’s why I have to visit my daughter next weekend. She has a performance and Dad is going to be there for her.

So since I can’t be in two places at once, you have to go to Snowjam Comedy Festival on my behalf and report back to me. Right, that’s your homework. You better do it. Snowjam Comedy Festival, SnO Jam Comedy Fest dot com. Check it out, man.

You know who else goes to comedy shows sometimes? Prince Harry. Did you hear he has a book? I don’t know if you heard about it, and nobody’s really talking about it. Apparently in Prince Harry’s book Spare which if you can’t get enough Prince Harry, don’t forget to listen to Palace Intrigue wherever you get your podcast.

That’s the show about the royal family. I’m the writer. We make fun of Prince Harry almost every day. When Harry was in the army, he said we were taken to a comedy show. Attendance was quasi mandatory.

Whoever organized it had good intentions, a bit of levity after a tour of hell, and to be fair, some of us did laugh, but most didn’t. We were struggling and didn’t know we were struggling. We had memories to process, mental wounds to heal, existential questions to sort. We’ve been told that a padre was available if we needed to talk, but I remember no one going near him. So we just sat at the comedy show in the same way.

We sat in the VHR tent. That’s the very readiness tent where they’d wait on alert for missions. We sat in the VHR tent in a state of suspended animation waiting. Harry says, I felt bad for those comedians one tough gig. He did not reveal or remember which stand ups were on stage that night.

Get out your Daily Comedy News bingo card, because I’m about to mention Andrew Santino again. Yeah, it’s funny how comedians go on little runs. Santino’s coming up every day. Coincidentally, he just had a new special funny how that works out. But this time I’m talking about Andrew Santino, who’s a fine, fine, wonderful comedic actor, and he’s on Dave and Dave Bird’s comedy series.

Dave is coming back for season three. It’ll be back Wednesday, April fifth, tenies to ten West on FXX, stream the next day on Hulu, which is how I will watch it. In season three, Dave Bird is headlining his first ever tour and looking for love along the way. But as he and his gang criss cross America, they discover firsthand how diverse the cultural landscape of the US really is and how often theme puts pressure love and friendship. Oh no, Lilton, my voice aside, Andrew Santina’s very good on that show.

In other TV news, Mo Mo amorous show. It did get a seconds and final season. If you get two seasons on Netflix, that’s a miracle. So many things they put up for one season and then they’re like, like Blockbuster, They’re like, but Moe’s getting his seconds and final season. Most pretty good.

If you haven’t watched that. I put on Velma for ten minutes or so, and it was interesting. I was emailing my cousin about it, as I tend to do when I’m watching TV. And I was telling him that it’s not bad.

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And then Glenn Howarden, who plays Fred, had a scene and Glenn Howard, and wh…

He’s probably my favorite cast member. He chased me. I didn’t like at all what they did with the character of Fred, nor did I like Glenn’s portrayal of Fred. And I was in the middle of emailing my cousin and then Howarden came on his friend and I was like, you know what, I don’t think I liked this show, so I bailed. I’ve got the remote in my hand.

This year, you got ten minutes. It’s not working. I’m out. Let’s hit gossip corner from The Daily Mail. Guess who was walking their dogs together, Louis C.K.

And Chris Rock. Yes, the Daily Mail says Chris Rock was all smiles as he joked around with Louis C.K. The Daily Mail phrase it like this comedian. Rock wore a padded blue jacket joggers and trainers, paired with a woolen hat and shades while strolling with Lewis, who became embroiled in a sexual harassment scandal in twenty seventeen. And that’s your comedy news for today.

Follow the show for free on Apple, podcast, Spotify, YouTube, wherever you get your shows, and I’ll see here tomorrow.

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All right, here’s the pitch.

Five stories. They’re all good news. It’s called five Good News Stories. No negative news, just kid news. Nice easy way to start your day, hopefully smile.

Hi, I’m Johnny Mack, host of five Good News Stories. So you get the premise. There’s five stories and they’re all good news. So the number five good news stories. Five good news Stories.

Follow the show wherever you get your podcasts.

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Full Transcript

Let me do some different things here today. Hi, I’m Johnny Mack with your Daily Comedy News. If you listen to Thursday’s pod, you heard me get the giggles out at the end. I kicked two stories, so I’m gonna pull those up to the front here and just mix it up. Instead of leading with the headliner is let me lead with the back end stuff today.

If you’re a new listener, pick a different episode. If you listen every day, you know my vibe. But here’s some stuff that I wanted to get to and didn’t get to during the week. From the La Times. As a stand up comedian with several pausy, he uses a wheelchair.

Joe Yurrell might have the hardest profession when it comes to being a person with disability. When it comes to telling jokes, he sees his unique traits as a way to lift himself above the crowd. I love the writing here. First joke. I don’t want people to feel bad for me because I’m in a wheelchair, because if I wasn’t in a wheelchair, I’d be stealing cars.

And I know that because I stole this wheelchair. Love it, Love the pause, love the kicker. Awesome next one. I was born in Coco Beach, Florida. When I was ten, my birth family put me in foster care.

I was adopted by a family in Huntington Beach when I was well. My mom adopted sixty kids with her nonprofit kind of a hoarding problem from Yahoo. Comedian Genie Godly has vowed to quote go out with a bang. She’s sixty one and was diagnosed with stage three ovarian cancer. She’s refused to cancel her tour of Scotland after her cancer returned.

She told TV’s Lorraine on the very first day, I got chemotherapy and I go straight from the cancer clinic in Glasgow, straight into the tour van and straight on stage. I genuinely can’t wait to see people have a laugh and talk about something that isn’t the symptoms of cancer. I want to be able to have a laugh and I’m excited. Ovarian stage three cancer is treatable, but it’s not curable. It never goes away, and it’s always there.

It’s always going to come back, and I’m always gonna have to keep fighting it. I don’t know how long I’ve got, but like a mayfly, I’m gonna enjoy it. While I can. I’m gonna go on tour, and if I’m gonna go out, I’m gonna go out with a bang. I love your attitude, Genie.

Best of luck to you. From my San Antonio dot com HBO posted a TikTok of comedian Ralph Barbosa. He was born and raised in Dallas. Orbosa explain that he doesn’t really vibe with country music, as most of his beers in Texas too. He said, it’s not my thing, but my friends are like, na, man, you don’t like country because you haven’t listened to George Street.

They’re like, George Straight is one of the greatest of all time. He’s from Texas. We’re from Texas. He makes these badass songs. Barbosa says his friends played him Straight song take Me to Texas the joke.

There’s a lyric that says, take Me to Texas two hundred years ago. He then pauses and raise an eyebrown says, I don’t know, man, I could see how some people might like that song, but it’s not from me. The full lyric by George Straight, take Me to Texas two hundred years Ago, where pride rose from the ashes of Santacinto still beats in every heart the reference. On April twenty first, eighteen thirty six, Sam Houston and some eight hundred Texans defeated Santa Anna’s Mexican force of approximately fifteen hundred men at the Battle of San Jacinto, shouting Remember the Alamo. Barbosa’s joke got four point eight million views more than five hundred and eleven thousand likes.

Many people in the comments are defending George straight, saying he’s a legend who loved Mexico. Catpad thirteen eighty nine said George loves Mexico. He embraces the whole culture. Camail nan Gianni said he only got in a stand up because he wanted to write jokes. He said it was a necessary evil.

I hardly performed before nine to eleven, and afterwards things suddenly shifted. I found being on stage miserable. People felt okay yelling racist stuff at me, and it kept throwing me. I had a pre write specific comebacks to take control so I wouldn’t lose the rest of the audience. Wow, he teld Fast Company.

I make jokes in real life often I’m still a person who’s trying to find the funny side of things for sure. When it comes to specific use of the comedy skills, like say, stand up that does get rusty, and it’s very rusty right now. If I got on stage right now, I don’t know how it would go. I’d need a few sets to really get back on it. Will he return to stand up?

I haven’t really done stand up since February twenty twenty. It’s the single toughest challenge. It’s the hardest thing. It’s the thing that falls away first because everything else on the schedule, and stand up can be whenever you wanted to be. In twenty twenty, I was like, this will be the year I get I can stand up, do a tour, and then suddenly the world changed.

I couldn’t do it, but what I have done it for sure if we didn’t have COVID, I can’t say for sure. There were a few years where I was doing stand up where I felt like, oh, I’m good at this. I recorded one special referring to Beta Mail his special from twenty thirteen. I like the special. I’m proud of it, but I feel it’s still not me at my best.

When I was doing my best stand up and I know it sounds a little arrogant, but I’m not at my best right now, so I feel okay saying that a previous version of me was good at something that I’m now rusty at. A few ways you can support the show. One go to buy meacoffee dot com slash Daily Comedy News. Several options there. One thing you can do is you can join the two dollar club and then once a month, buy meacoffee dot Com will ding your credit card and two dollars minus a service fee will make its way to me.

Nice easy way to support the show. I’ll give you a shout on the show. Happy to do that. You can throw five dollars in the tip jar on buy meacoffee dot com slash Daily Comedy News. I will take your money.

I’ll go to the National Donuts chain and I will buy one of these ic coffees. Do you hear it? This one has about let’s say eighteen percent left, and I’ll probably buy a large iced coffee with caramel and milk. Separate from that, you can become a premium subscriber on Apple Podcasts. If you go to the Apple podcast app and find this show, they’ll put the option under your nose what happens there is for five bucks a month, you get the episodes commercial free and early.

What do I mean by early, Like as soon as I finished the edit, I just post it so you’ll get it the night before, if that makes any sense. And if you just want to try that for free or not hear any commercials for a month, the first month’s free and then after that it’s five bucks, so go for that much. Thanks to the members, including Mike and Cleveland, Gary Tallman, Hello, Andrea, How you doing? Shannon? Thank you?

And Kenny who’s always trying to get me to switch coffee chains. How you doing, Kenny? Thank you all so much for supporting the show. At buy Meacoffee dot com, slash Daily Company News otsko at Kaska, Well, she’s really popping right like people are into her. I can almost say her name correctly without having to check my fonetic spelling like I did last year.

And that’s not a joke. She was talking to the report about her grandmother and said, my grandma’s going with the flow finally in life. She’s been a caretaker most of her life. She still takes care of my mom most of the time. She’s eighty seven.

She raised three kids on her own. She lost her husband when she was twenty eight. Then she had to raise me when my mom couldn’t. I started making silly videos to post online would make people feel really good, and that made me feel good. One day, Grandma was like, can I join you in one of the dances.

It’s her having fun for the first time and allowing herself to play too. When I tell her things like that video we did has twenty million views, all that to me sounds made up. I don’t have many zeros. That is off the top of my head. I think any older person already has a hard time grasping what fame or exposure means.

When we taped our special in New York, I got to fly her first class, and I think then she really saw this is where comedy has taken you. I get to lay down flat, I’m eating beef, I get champagne. The Holly reporter said, you have such a unique style of delivery. She sure does, and I love it. Do you have any comic inspirations?

Listen to this answer. I grew up watching Scooby Doo. I feel like I’m sort of a cartoon character. In the way that I express. I’m also a proud immigrant.

I speak in weird cadences, I make weird noises with my mouth. I grew up watching Lucille Ball and Charlie Chaplin because I didn’t know English, it had to be physical humor. Yeah, I was gonna jump in there and’d be like, wait, Charlie Chaplin is influencing your stand up, but does that work? But she clearly read the next tent that’s John. Calm down, stop jumping to conclusions.

And then when I finally got to know the language, the first person I saw stand up was Margaret Show. That was mind blowing to realize all these things I was watching as comedy, which were more physical and cartoony, She’s able to express in just words. I was like, oh wow, that’s its own art form. That was a pivotal moment for me when I realized stand up comedy was a job.

And then tig Nazara was my other idol too.

Rory Scovell spoke to the Houston Press gave a shout out to someone he’s admired from the sidelines for years, Bo Burnham. I also earlier today saw an article about Patton Oswalt really waxing the car of bo Burnham. Bow’s got a lot of fans. Scoville called bou Burnham a savant. He knows exactly what to do and or even know how this set operates or what the language is.

He somehow ready completely knows and understands it. So to see him explore the way he has, I think inside does one of the most genius things I’ve watched the longest time, From top to bottom. I just loved every element about it. Just to know it’s so vulnerable and real and him is the best. I just love it.

The genius that’s coming out of that. I witness that forever ago. But now to see him at full control and know that he can really do it is really cool. It’s really cool to see. And I don’t know if he would take this as a compliment or an insult, but to see this awakening of his own that he sees he can do this, make this version of the thing that I know how to make it, especially now because comedy specials are so oversaturated in the market.

Yes there’s a new special every week, Yes, where people walk out on stage and say things. I’ve always found it to be more fun to be at the event, to feel the power in the fun of it. Not that we can always be at the events, but for Bo Burnham to make the version that it is, that version is the better version. You’d never want to be at that and you couldn’t. It’s impossible.

I just love the aspect of it. Not comedy news for Today. Father Show for free on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, YouTube, wherever you get your shows. See you tomorrow. Hello, I am Mark Francis, host of a daily podcast about the British royal family called Palace Intrigue.

Did you see what Megan Michael did in her latest documentary or what Prince Harry said in his new book, Well, the Kings and Queens and princes and princesses are ready to explode, Andrew is ready to implode. Royal sources are jumping at the bit. The inlaws just can’t stop. The UK tabloids are about to burst. Americans can’t get enough, the kids can’t get any cute to the press can’t get any uglier.

And Wills and Kate, well, they’re just wonderful. Get your daily dose of gossip and news from the world’s most royal family. Follow Palace Intrigue on Apple podcasts, YouTube, or wherever you’ve get your shows

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Full Transcript

From the Washington Post. Comedians made some hilarious jokes about climate change. Were they right time, Johnny Mack with your Daily Comedy News. Well, let’s see this one from Michelle Wolf. Climate change is a real big deal, and everyone says Mother Nature.

And I do believe Nature is a woman, because she’s trying to kill us in the most passive aggressive way possible. It’s not some sort of immediate fire or flutter cool explosion. She’s just like, what, I raise the temperature a little. Oh, are you comfortable? Maybe I wouldn’t have if you’d taken out the recycling like I asked.

I’m fine. That’s from twenty seventeen. The Washington Post then said a two degree fahrenheit increase over the past one or fifty years may sound inconsequential, for research shows the incremental heating were experiences pushing climate weather events to more extremes. I love what they did with this article. Nate burgatcy I looked up a list of what you’re supposed to do for global warming.

Is an individual, just talk to your friends and family about it. Think about how far it goes. I had a great aunt and uncle Phis fight each other at a wedding. Let me get the middle of that fight. Any chances fights about global warming, because I’d just love to get that conversation rolling.

That’s from twenty nineteen. Sis say people need to talk about climate change more, but Brigatsi describes how hard that task is. He’s not wrong. A bit of a stretch there, Washpo Joe Kim Booster from twenty twenty two Psycho Sexual. He has a couple in the crowd if they plan to have kids, they say yes, Joel says, so he don’t believe in climate change.

Wow, what an interesting way to learn that. I do think if you’re having kids knowing everything we know about the way the world is going, It’s sort of like when you’re at a party that you know is dying down. You get a tax from my friend. They’re like, Hey, should I still come to the party? Yeah?

Jump with that uber. I’m sure it’ll be fine. I’m sure there’ll still be ice at the party by the time you get here. When what you should be doing is calling them immediately being like, don’t come here. Somebody put on a podcast.

Party’s over. But The Washington Post points out, if the US meets its goal to cut emissions by half by twenty thirty and zero by twenty twenty. A child born today would have less of an environmental impact per year over their lifetime. Let me jump in here. I have that lilt in my voice when I’m amused by an article.

I’m actually if you know me in real life, I talk about the climate emergency a lot, So I don’t want to diminish this article. I’m just enjoying it as host of Daily Comedy News. The jective position between these jokes and these like serious points in between, that’s what’s making me laugh here. Interesting note from the author. I don’t know if Booster knew the carbon footprint of having a child when writing this joke.

Disclaimer I opened for him on his tour about a year before special and don’t remember talking specifically about climate change or hearing this joke. Kasha Patel is your author and also a comedian. Kristen Silvis, climate change is crazy. They got me scared about property at this point. I don’t want to pay for flood insurance.

I don’t even have car insurance. Like Silvis jokes flood insurance premiums or another cost that can be challenging to answer everyday expenses. Silvis told the Post comedians have always been vessels for change. Why not make use of that platform and humanize big issues like this? Well done, Washington Post.

Kamail nan Gianni, Hey, Camail, do you think of yourself as a comedian? If I were to say comedian actor Kamail nan Gianni, what part of you would think actor comedian Kamil na Gianni or actor writer Kamale This from the Good One podcast. On Jianni’s answer, it was a moment earlier where you said you were a comedian and that hurt my feelings. I was like, this, Emma, are over here. I definitely consider myself still a comedian.

I love doing it. I just haven’t done it all since February twenty twenty. That was the year I just finished shooting Eternals, and I was like, this will be the first year I do stand up and then you know, it didn’t happen. The hardest thing about coming back from breaks is for some reason, the jokes you’re doing before stop working, so you need new jokes. But it’s very hard to get into the gear of writing new jokes if you’re not used to being on stage.

So there’s always the tricky thing for me, The big barrier to coming back is having the time to do jokes and test them out. And do jokes and test them out. It’s a commitment. Like getting ten great new minutes would take me a while. Weird Q and A here Q, remember when you hosted SNL A, yeah, I do remember I hosted SNL so weird.

I was so nervous for it. But it’s really not a nerve wracking experience. It’s really more than ending an exhausting experience. The week is so busy, you’re going, going, going, going.

And then I went up and did the dress rehearsal and I went great, and I was li…

I have to do that again. When I was asked, I was like, oh, I want to write a good stand up set. I hadn’t been doing stand up a lot, and I just wrote this new seven minute set. That was the last time I was really like trying to build a stand up thing beforehand. They just told me just you know, sometimes Steven Spielberg comes and watches a student my set, and I looked over and he was like that far like row seven I’m talking.

Suddenly, I was like, oh, that’s definitely Steven Spielberg. If you watch it, you can see the moment I spot him and I stumbled for a little bit. You will know exactly what moment it is. I take a deep breath and I look away, and then I go back to it. From Ghana, Webb Dave Chappelle has revealed that jay Z has made some investment properties in Ghana.

According to a report from Ghana, Webb and Chapelle made the diclosure at a private event at the University of Ghana, saying that jay Z showed him pictures of the properties when he informed him about his plans to visit Ghana. The Jewish Chronicle caught up with Ari Shaffier. He said, superstars on TV are done, but there’s so many guys who owned houses, and that wasn’t a possibility before you were either Ray Romano or a road life or barely getting by having an apartment and dying at seventy with a heart attack. He says comedy is as big as it ever was, despite those that protest. Comedians and hosts quoting Ari, podcasts and comics are the only ones making rape jokes anymore, or age jokes and really going for it and being dirty when you can’t get it anywhere mainstream because someone might lose their job, then they come to us.

He was also looking forward to playing Pittsburgh. He appreciates the city for its casual acceptance that everyone is fat. It’s like donah, yeah, yeah, French fries and garbage on top of your salads. And he noted Pittsburgh as a cool city like Nashville or Austin, but without the street cred. He Mike bur Biglia, you booked David Letterman show at twenty four?

Did you realize this a big break? Then? That is a premise floated to Mike Greer Biglia by the Hollywood Reporter. But big said, I think so. They’re out my twenties.

Every article is about me. This guy’s the next big thing. Same with my thirties. Now in my forties, I’m the veteran of comedy. People don’t know how to position me because I’ve never had it happened to me and they signed Feldian or Ray Romano.

Way, it’s who. Ray Romano mentions in today’s podcast, if he had Ray Romano and Daily Comedy News bingo, you won. That’s not how bingo works, Johnny Mack whatever. That was Ali by choice. When I was thirty, I got a CBS sitcom pilot, Greenlit.

Nick Croll and Bob oden Kirk were in it with me, but it didn’t get picked up. Oops, CBS executive. And that moment it hit me like a ton of bricks. I don’t want to be a sitcom star. And it’s not like they don’t still call I’m everything that networks think they want.

Because I smile a lot. They’re like, oh, we can mold this person. This is perfect for us. I had to come to Grips with the idea that the endgame for me is not being rich. The endgame is making something that makes me proud.

Good follow up here, the Seinfeld Romano sitcom path is gone. But is there a biggily a version of Barry or Rammie that’s appeling ber Big said, I love Barry Rami and Moa Mayer’s show, but no, I don’t like serialized storytelling. I’m obsessed with the ninety minute story. Everyone’s like it’s the golden age of TV. Who is the time in ninety minutes or two hours?

I want to meet characters, understand a world, go on a journey and land somewhere that’s slightly different from the beginning. I want to feel something and laugh and walk away and talk about it with my wife. That’s it. Another good question, if you took money out of the equation, would you prefer to release your work as film specials are comedy albums? Berbig said, when it comes to stand up I’m most interested in the audio.

The imagination could do a lot of work. If you listen to a Steve Martin record from the seventies, there are visual gags, but you get a sense for it. I Here Glass taught me this about radio over the years. Audio is so intimate you feel like you’re with the person. To be clear, theater is different.

It’s the sign that we’re all there together. And has he noticed anything about his audience since pin chaiting for Jimmy Kimmel earlier in the year, Rubig said, you realize when you do something that mainstream and wide reaching, the legitimacy that a network platform still gives you. People came out of the woodwork. Certain people were treating me like I had made it. They were like, you know, you could do this and I’m like, no, no, no, I do this other thing.

That’s your comedy news for today. Follow a show for free on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, YouTube, wherever you get your shows. See you tomorrow.

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All right, here’s the pitch.

Five stories. They’re all good news. It’s called five good News Stories. No negative news, just kid news. Nice easy way to start your day, hopefully smile.

Hi, I’m Johnny Mack, host of five of Good News Stories. So you get the premise. There’s five stories and they’re all good news. So the number five good news stories. Five good news Stories.

Follow the show wherever you get your podcasts.

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Full Transcript

The Shark Deck. I’m Johnny Mac with your Daily Comedy News. I am all kinds of comedy snobby this week. If you’ve been listening, you’ve heard it, You’re gonna hear it more again Today. I’ll start with late night jokes, a bunch of good ones and then some bad.

Let’s just use the word bad. Why are you pulling your punches, Johnny Mac, They’re bad. Let’s start with the good. Jimmy Kimmel was having fun with Biden and the classified documents, and he joked America is one episode of Storage Wars away from finding out who killed JFK. Staffords for Joe Biden are now searching everywhere he could have possibly left documents.

His knapsack is Peel organizer under the arch at the nineteen o four World’s Fair. I love the Biden old jokes because they’re harmless, but they’re hilarious. Kimmel again. They could be in a birthday card he sent to his grandkids next to a crisp two dollar bill. No one knows.

And of course, at anytime documents are mishandled top secret documents, it needs to be taken seriously. That’s something Republicans Democrats believe, although Republicans have only believed it since Monday. Now the bad jokes, and these are terrible. The topic the FAA outage the other day. Jimmy Fallon.

Yeah, zero flights took off, but somehow everyone’s luggage still ended up in Pittsburgh. Yeah, Kimmel, this one was a little better. The system went down, resulting in an awful morning for travelers and a great morning for Southwest Airlines. They were like, wasn’t our fault this time? All right, Colbert, Well, this is what happens when you run your entire aviation system off a boingo hotspot.

Colbert does a lot of weird jokes like that that I don’t know. Again, I’m sure he tells them better than I do. I just don’t feel like they land fallon with this hackey one. Yeah, no one could fix the computer glitch. One guy at the FAA said, I don’t know, maybe unplug it and plug it back in.

But Jimmy Fallon saved himself. This last one is good.

Meanwhile, the outage happened while some planes were in the air.

If there’s one thing you don’t want to hear from your pilot, it’s at tension passengers, do yourself a favor and stay off Twitter for a little bit. The Hollywood Reporter caught up with Kevin Hart. Now the transcript of Kevin, I’m having a little trouble following it out. This is not a dig at Kevin. I’m really interested in the story.

But what you’re hearing right now is my third attempt to do the story because I keep tripping over the way the transcript reads Kevin’s words, so I’ll read them verbatim and see if you could follow along. Kevin said, Dave Chappelle has made me and Chris Rock feel stupid at times when it comes to our choice and material. All right, great topic. That’s why I’m interested, Kevin says. We have watched Dave in our earlier stages of just working on our set.

We would spend time at the seller and one would come and we would all go and Dave would go up, and me and Chris had just went up and we were happy about our material. That’s the sentence that isn’t working for my brain. Kevin continued. There’s been times where we’ve looked at each other and we bought our papers up and said we got to start over. We got to start over, not because if jealousy or envy, because we challenge each other.

We want the best for not only each other, but for ourselves. Love it. Kevin was on Jay Shetty’s pod and he said, the biggest drug, it’s not cocaine, it’s not heroin, it’s fame. Anything you want, everything you want, it’s the thing. And if an analyst thing, the consequences attached or severe, you know you undre you okay with you?

If you’re not, it’ll break you. By the way, for Monday show, I’ve got a bizarre Kevin Hart story for you. Ricky Gervais has shared his quotes frustration after fans were turned away from his show in York the other night. Why Apparently they had purchased tickets from resale site via go Go. Hundreds of fans reportedly refused entry to see Ricky Gervais after duplicate tickets the previous evening led to overbooking.

Oh. Maxine Gordon was a reporter for The York Press and was quoted by the York Press. Maxine said, when me and my husband turned up at the York Barbican, that’s the theater at seven twenty for the seven thirty show, there were hundreds of people still queuing to get in. Well time out get there a little earlier, man, what are you doing? There were still hundreds of people queuing to get in, as well as a very long queue for the box office, again unusual.

I thought the delay was because they were being extra thorough checking bags, but as we got nearer the entrance, the bouncers and ticketing staff were shouting that they were only accepting Ticketmaster tickets and not via go go, which are the tickets from a resale site. Lots of people are asked to leave as my ticket was checked. I asked, what’s going on? I was told the night before lots of people are turned up with via go go tickets, but duplicates, all for the same seats, so they weren’t accepting any last night. Ricky Gervais, who said that particular gig was his favorite of the tour, told angry fans he didn’t know anything about it until after the show.

He said, I’ve sent all this to the promoter at Live Nation. He’s looking into it. I have no idea why this happened tonight. Apparently in the past, comedians Stuart Lee and Tim Minchin have previously denounced Via Go Go for artificially inflating ticket prices and ripping off fans. In twenty twenty one, Tim reportedly called them cheating scumbags.

It’s being a Ricky Gervais. Newsweek took a look at Drug Carmichael versus Ricky Gervais fans debate who was better Globes host. They went on social media see what people were tweeting. One tweeter said, Drug Carmichael is a boring host, so much dry and stupid jokes. He’s trying so much to be Ricky Gervais, horrible Golden Globe host.

Ever, I believe that Twitter dropped a word there. It happens, I do it. On the other side, somebody wrote Drug Carmichael is giving a master class and how to evolve what made Ricky Gervais a great host, while maintaining that he’s still punch up. I’m sure the Globes of want to wait to see the ratings, but I’d sign them to a multi year contract if I were them. Well, second tweeter, you’re just wrong.

Drug Carmichael was terrible, and as for those ratings and that multi year deal, you just hand it out. Who How about this headline from the year post woke Golden Globes tanked ratings historic low in twenty twenty three. I’m just gonna keep moving. I don’t know why the Post had to throw a woke in there. I’m here for the ratings.

Six point three million people, according to Nielsen, watched it. For comparison, in twenty twenty one, the broadcast drew six point nine million, while twenty twenty boasted eighteen point three million viewers. Let’s see who hosted those years. The twenty twenty was Ricky Gervais, the twenty twenty one was ten Fa and Amy Poehler. The Golden Globes.

If they want this to be a thing, and NBC wants this to be a thing, back up the truck and get Ricky back in there now, the Daily Mail says. Last year, Ricky Gervais revealed that he told bosses never to ask him again for fear he’d cave in and say yes to hosting. Ricky said, the Golden Globes could offer me ten million for ten minutes work, and I’d be an idiot. I’d be a liar to say I wouldn’t consider it, but at the moment, given I’ve done it five times, it got better and better for me. I enjoyed them all, but it got better, and I’m planning to never do it again.

I’ve asked them not to ask me because I could be persuaded. That’s true. You know it’s not a principle. Good honest answer, Back up the truck. I’m still disappointed Chris Rock isn’t hosting the Oscars.

That was totally the move. Come on, it’s entertaining people. We all want the side show. Let’s all be honest, we all want the sideshow. Chris Rock hosting the Oscars was the move.

HBO Max has dropped the first two episodes of Velma that suddenly showed up yesterday. I don’t think anyone was expecting it from what I’m reading on the interwebs. So this is the Mindy Cave Scooby Doo ish series. It’s like Scooby Doo. My cousin says it’s a prequel.

I guess a couple tweaks. The characters are a little different. We now see the show through the eyes of Velma, voiced by Mindy Kaling. Fred is voiced by Glenn Howarden playing Fred is kind of pompous, white, good looking jackass character. You’ve seen this in movies?

Yes. The one I can’t figure out is Shaggy is now named Norville. That’s like one of those things from the seventies when you’d watch cartoons and you’d be like, wait, why is Mutley now mumbly? Like that kind of thing, like why is Shaggy now Norville? Why can’t he be Shaggy.

Shaggy also has a completely different personality from the trailer that I watched, and it doesn’t do all the zoing stuff. Now you’re like, is there a Scooby Doo? Nope, no dog at all. Pretty good cast. We mentioned Mindy Kaling and Glenn Howard and also Sam Richardson plays Norville, who’s not Shaggy for some reason, Constance who was Daphne.

Other cast Jane Lynch, Wanted Psykes, Russell Peters, Melissa Famero, Stephen Roots, Fortune Feamster in a cal Buyer, and weird Al Yankovic. Are you psyched for the snow Jam Comedy Festival? We’re just a week out January nineteenth through the twenty first snow Jam back in Sioux Falls, South Dakota for its eighth year. It’s mission celebrate comedy and snow while in rision community by supporting nonprofit organizations in South Dakota. This year’s headliners include Jackie Caation and Miss Shannon from Nickelodeon’s nick Mom’s Night Out.

The festival also feature a live Dork Forest podcast recording with Jackie and a special guest. This year, the charity partners of the Compass Center, whose mission is navigating the journey to healing for all affected by sexual, relational and family trauma, and also the Transformation Project, whose mission is to support and e power transgender individuals and their families while educating communities in South Dakota and the surrounding region about gender identity and expression. Nathan Halts, He’s president of the board. He said the festival it started as a joke. Let’s bring people to the best place on earth at the worst time.

Joke was on me. It’s the best thing I’ve ever been part of. Check out the schedule, get some tickets Man Snowjamcomedyfest dot com SnO Jamcomedyfest dot com Snowjamcomedyfest dot com. You got a week January nineteenth to twenty. First get out there.

I’ll be talking about it all next week. This next story comes to us from Gazette dot com and it was a good headline, second cleanest comedian in the States to headline Colorado Springs Comedy Club. And I’m like, I love that second cleanest comedian thing because that gets me curious. Okay, who’s the most clean comedian? You got me?

And I read the article and then I didn’t react well to it because it’s like generic comedian interview. We’re promoting a Mark Masters comedy show. I’ve never met mark I have nothing against some work, but now I’m in comedy snob territory. What’s the show like Mark Masters? The answer, In those travels, I run into a lot of funny situations and comedic things happen.

That’s like every middle tier comedian’s interview ever. Everything from marquane household items to funny family stories of personal stuff about me and my family will make up a Mark Masters comedy show. All right, I could let that go. But another thing you’ll see in all these releases, for like touring comics in Middle America, everybody is always attaching their vague credits. You know, appeared on serious radio meeting Johnny Mack played your record fourteen years ago once or my favorite is the worked with masters, a headliner on the Pro Comedy Tour, has worked with comedians from HBO, Comedy Central, and Netflix.

So have I. And I’m sitting here in the basement. I’m not a stand up, but I have worked with Jeff Foxworthy, Ron White, Jamie Fox, Jerry Seinfeld, Jim gaff Again, Bill Engvall, Larry the Cable Guy. I’ve worked with them all. I’m practically the fifth blue collar no no.

But here’s what really set me off, the part of the article where you kiss up to the town in the club. I love Colorado’s Springs, Olympic City, USA. They’re the best, great audiences. That’s right. Hey, welcome to the stage, Johnny Mack.

Hey, thanks, Let’s give it up for the guy who introduced me. Yay, yay, yay, Hey Colorado Springs, give it up for yourselves. Hey, great, I’ve just done fifteen seconds of the worst stand up you’ve ever heard. Now I’ll go into my proctology bit. Yes, I’m still on my high horse of Andrew Santino.

Yes, I went to the doctor right and he was like, take you off your pants. I was like, whoa, Now I’m not doing that bit. Mark Masters says, I’m thrilled to be back in three East Comedy Club, which is a beautiful space. They get incredible acts, but it’s really an honor to be a headliner. Mark Masters, If you’re listening, I didn’t come to beat up on you at all.

It’s just I’ve seen this article. It’s like comedian mad Libs and I could just plug in. I’ve actually seen this particular person who I’m friends who are friendly with Jim Norton. I’ve seen him and be like, yeah, hey, I’m playing the Chuckle Hutt in Springfield. Chuckle Hut’s a great place.

It’s great stage. Springfields always great crowds. Everybody does that. Why speaking of it? Andrew Santino Whiskey Riff dot Com say it with me.

You’re home for comedy news. They report comedian Andrew Santino, you know the guy who does a rectal exam bit. Nine minutes into his hour on Netflix, that guy, Comedian Andrew Santina recalls Patrick Mahomes drinking the venue out of corps light. Apparently Santina was on Pardon My take, this week and said of Patrick Mahomes, he came for the first show and he was like man, so fff and fun.

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And then he goes all right, well then what he wants us to do now?

And I Andrew Santina was like, I’ll see you. I’m gonna go do the second show. You guys go out fun and I’ll see him whatever. And he’s like, no, I think we’re gonna stay for the second show. I Andrew Santina was like, oh, okay, I left for sure he’d dip in, but he was like, no, I want to stay.

And the server comes up to me and she’s light, that’s your party, right, And I was like, yeah, whatever, I’ll take care of the bill whatever it is. She’s like no, no, no, we’re comping everything anyway. I just want to let you know that we have someone that’s gonna go get more Corps Light because mister Mahomes has finished all the Corps Light. According to Santino, I’m not kidding when I say this, maybe thirteen the first show and maybe ten the second show, and then we went out. I have no knowledge at all about Patrick Mahomes drinking twenty three course lights.

In fact, I’m going to say, it’s possible that it’s not true at all, and this is just a comedian having some fun. I imagine Patrick at home studying the playbook for the playoffs. Let’s stop off at Gossip Corner. Emily Radikowski, Huh. She was on her podcast and was talking about people she’s dated in the past.

You may recall she recently dated Pete Davidson. She didn’t say who she was speaking about, but she said, they’re like, you know, you’re special, you’ve done it, but then they get slowly emasculated and they don’t know what to do with those feelings, and they resent you and they start to tear you down. I’m not sure she said it quite like that, but I liked my dramatic read. A source says, although Radikowski didn’t mention Pete Davidson by name, there’s no doubt who she was referring to. The source says Emily didn’t appreciate being tossed aside, and she’s not one to remain silent about how she feels.

Expect her to have more to say about this in the future. Oh, please do, because I enjoy doing Gossip Corner. Pete Davidson’s mom Amy Waters Davidson has been hoping her son would settle down with quote a nice girl. A source said, Mom would like to see him settle down and find a nice girl who’s marriage material, not some fame hugging celebrity. Again, I’m not sure.

Amy Waters Davidson said it exactly that way. That’s my dramatic recreation. That’s your communy news for today. Follow the show for free on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, YouTube, rerevergate your show see tomorrow. Did you hear about the border collie who recycles trash and when he’s out on his walks, or how about the bear that stole so much Chick fil A?

But good News left the salad behind. Hi, I’m Johnny Mack, host of Five Good News Stories. Don’t worry. I have stories about humans too, Like there’s a woman who makes a living because she looks like Jim Carrey. It’s my podcast.

It’s five Good News Stories, Five Good News Stories the number. Five good News Stories twice a week. Five Good News Stories. Oh, and Shamrock shakes her back too. Good News, Five Good New Stories.

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