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The Shark Deck. Hey, I’m Johnny Mack with your Daily Comedy News. Jesus Nice is just not gonna get the Taily Show. One of the jokes that I saw was Martin Scorsese’s out here making movies that last longer than speaker candidates. And I was like, ah, really, so I don’t usually do this.
Let me play a clip just so you don’t think I’m piling on. Listen to this. Let’s kick things off in Congress, we’re today Republicans were once again trying to pick a new speaker after Kevin Carky was kicked out and Steve’s colise failed and Jim Jordan no, so Phil, And then today they nominated some poor bastard named Tom Emmerts. And this dude was their nominee for four hours and then he dropped out. Martins Scorsese’s out here making movies that last longer than speaker candidates.
If you saw it this afternoon, you missed this dude’s entire nomination. It’s just not good. It’s not gonna be good enough, all right. Chris Rock, Adam Sandler, Amy Schumer, and others will appear at Next four Autism’s annual Night of Too Many Stars Comedy Concert, December eleventh, Beacon Theater in New York City.
Also on the bill Rachel Bloom, Stephen Colbert, Ron Funches, James Austin Joh…
The event was created by Robert Smigel, you may know him as the voice of Triumph of the Insults, Comic Dog and others. Tickets start at one hundred and thirty four dollars and fifty five cents and go on sale tomorrow at eleven am Ticketmaster. Another show announced, Pretty Cool. The National Coalition Against Censorship, in partnership with the New York Comedy Festival, has announced Stand Up for Free Speech, hosted by Judy Gold. This one thirty dollars.
In the lineup’s also pretty Good, Mark normand Adrian Applelucci, Michel Laine, Yaminika Sanders, Rich Voss and Moore Stand Up for Free Speech November sixth, nine thirty at Gotham in New York City. We have an official date for Matt Riiffe’s Natural Selection. Netflix says that will be out November fifteenth, by the way I was listening to. Matt Rife was the guest on two Bears one Cave Thomp Saguera was hosting that one. It’s really good.
Rife comes along as very likable. I haven’t finished it yet. I’m running a transcript on it. I’m going to pick away at that. I want to listen to the whole thing before I go through the transcript and pull stuff out.
But really good listen there. In a teaser, Matt Rife says he can’t stand social media. The official description says, from his problem with protection crystals to his beef with social media trolls, comedian Matt Rife holds nothing back in this rollicking stand up special Matt Riife Natural Selection, Netflix, November fifteenth. Ronny Chieng has announced a tour. It’ll start January twelfth in Indianapolis and hit Cincinnati, New York, Philly, and quotes other great cities.
Tickets on sale Friday. In the not too distant future, Mystery Science Theatre at three thousand will return. Mystery Science Theater turns thirty five this year, not counting the KTMA years. Joel Hodgson announced that financing for season fourteen has begun after the two revival seasons on Netflix. MST three K is now doing its own thing.
They have the Gizmo Plex and online viewing and community hub that hosted the crowdfunded season thirteen, which raised six point five million dollars. This year, the initial goal of four point eight million will fund six new episodes, six shorts, and eighteen quotes, surgically enhanced classic episodes that would upgrade installments Wasting Away in four EIGHTYP up to ten eighty HD. If the show hits six point one million the next season, we’ll get nine episodes, nine shorts, and twenty seven surgical operations. And if you guys want to raise seven point four million dollars, you’ll get twelve episodes, twelve shorts, and thirty six surgeries. I watched Pete Holmes new stand up special probably has a name.
What is it called? Not for everybody? I’m not doing that audience thing. I actually forgot. I am not for everyone.
I was close. I’m turning into my parents. It’s okay. The first third or so Pete is a little frantic, but then he settles in this a great bit in the middle about marriage that really had me going. I was really feeling the special and then I was sharing this in the Facebook group.
My wife did what she always does. I don’t know how she knows. I’m watching a stand up special show. Come bhy and do the whole Oh is this guy funny? Yes, that’s why I was sitting on the couch laughing out loud.
But I’ll pause it now. What should we talk about? Wife?
And then we talk about some stuff and then hit play and then takes me a while…
But Pete Holmes got me back in because his special is pretty good. I really enjoyed his closer as well. Pete also has some pretty good half ass impressions. He broke into a Jerry Seinfeld. He busted into another comedian and it’ll spoil the joke if I tell you who he did.
And I think there was a third. But I want to hang out with Pete Holmes and just trade off half ass impressions. I have spent some time with Pete in Miami. Very cool guy, exactly who you think he is, and I’ve seen him many times live. I am a big fan and this special will make Johnny Max Best of twenty twenty three, and I thought I would do this live with you as I record and figure out where it goes.
So right now, the number one comedy special of the year is Todd Barry’s Domestic Short Hair. You’ll find that on YouTube. Shane Gillis’s Netflix special is a strong number two, then a bit of a gap down to Tom Sagora, Kyle Kanay, Nate Brigatsey. It’s not better than any of those, Michelle Wolfe, j McBride, Jim Jeffries, Harry Condo Bolu. All Right, it’s better than Harry, but I don’t think it’s better than Jim.
All Right, that makes Pete Holmes the new number nine special. I’ll give you the updated list again. Number one, Sad Barry, then Shane Gillis, Toms Agora, Kyle Kanay, Nate Bergatsy, Michelle Wolfe, J McBride, Daddy’s Girls on YouTube, Jim Jeffries from Amazon in February that you forgot about Pete Holmes. Number nine. Harry Condo Bolu on YouTube is number ten running out the list, Chris Rock, Jimmy o’yang, The Roast of Mister Peanut, look it up, trust me, Big j Okerson, Mark normand Nimesh Patel, Sarah Silverman, Chris flemings Hell, and John Early.
So we now have a top nineteen. I guess I’ll get it to twenty and then start lopping people off the bottom. Watch out John Early specials of note Not on my top list, Jim Gahana again, Joe Lisz, Jared Freed, Amy Schumer, John Mulaney, Lewis Black, Hannah Gatsby, Mark Maren, Andrew Santino, Bert Kreischer, Greg Warren, Kevin Harritt, Lunel, Beth Stelling, Joe Parra, and Zorna garg Not on my list. I have not seen Roseanne special. Pitchfork did that thing where they would talk to John Mulaney about, Hey, you were this age, what were you listening to today?
We’ll take a look at age twenty five when John Mulaney was into Jay Z’s Say Hello, Laney said, I wasn’t doing any drugs or drinking at this point. I was still smoking cigarettes all the time, but that didn’t have any effect yet. It was a nice moment in time. I didn’t really have a day job. I was doing stand up at night.
I got to open for Berbiglia on the road, I got to open for the comedians of comedy. Life was getting really fun. I got a call to audition for SNL out of the Blue. I found out two days before, and I knew I wasn’t gonna get it. They had Hayter and Forte and Fred and Seth and Jason.
They didn’t need me. They offered a hotel for anyone auditioning, so I took it, and on my walk from the hotel to thirty Rocks audition for the show, I was listening to Say Hello from an American Gangster. I saw that movie, which is only pretty good, but I heard jay Z watched it and became inspired to make a whole album. That’s a funny thing to be like, wait, start recording, but Say Hello really psuck me up. I went to a place for the twenty minutes I was walking listening on repeat when I suddenly had this fake, super confident persona.
I have decent self esteem, but this was like, you’re a killer. I work myself up into a state with that song. I only got hired as a writer, but you know I got a job out of it. I should listen to that song again. Hmm.
So originally in this section here I was going to tell you about Pete Holmes Special, but I noticed the first half was a little short, and I wanted to go a little longer before the commercial break there. And I was also going to tell you about Matt Rife on Two Beers, One Cave, but I pulled that up because there was an actual Matt Rife news story. So it’s time for awkward segue into Kitty Lang, head of Comedy at United Agents, is under investigation by the top UK talent agency after social media reposts and shares highly critical of Israel as that country fights to war with Hamas this from The Hollywood Reporter on Tuesday morning. United Agents said on its ex account, we have been made aware of social media posts by one of our senior agents this morning. These are not the views of United Agents Limited.
We are conducting a full and thorough investigation into this immediately. Lang represents comedy writers and actors in sketch comedy artists. That’s why I’m mentioning this. She is United’s head of comedy. Some comedians you may have heard of, Katherine Ryan and Nick Mohammed.
You know Nick Mohammad from Ted Lasso. That’s why I’m mentioning it. Lang has taken down the posts put out a statement I would like to unreservedly apologize for my retweets on social media surrounding the horrendous attacks on Israel on October seventh. With hindsight, I realize how naive I’ve been, and that much of the information on social media surrounding the conflict is unsubstantiated and hurtful. I should have taken time to consider that beforehand.
This is Prison Banned Books Week, and the folks over at PENN, a literary and free expression organization, are trying to get attention for Prison Banned Books Week. Why I’m bringing this up. One of the books that is banned, Amy Schumer’s memoir The Girl with the Lower Back Tattoo. Why it was flagged by Florida officials for graphic sexual content and for quote being a threat to the secure security order or rehabilitative objects of the correctional system, or the safety of any person. Let’s hit gossip corner.
If you were in Georgetown, South Carolina, you were having dinner at Root. You know Root down on Front Street and downtown Georgetown. You know the place. Bill Murray walked in Root Restaurant on Facebook said we were super excited to have Bill Murray stopped buy for dinner tonight. One of the funniest men on the planet is also one of the coolest.
The restaurant told WMBF News that Bill Murray stayed until the restaurant closed and took pictures with the staff and signed autographs for them. Jordan Temple is one of Vulture’s twenty five comedians you should Know and keep an eye on, or whatever that’s called. They asked Jordan what unscripted or reality series would you be good at. Jordan said Survivor. I survived the public housing projects in New York City.
I can survive anything. Roaches are my friends, rats are my cousins, and I’ve seen cats as big as lions. I’m not a lion, sorry, but my arch type is rugged loaner with a pretty face. Everyone at Survivor would say, had you learn to survive that, I would look wistfully into the mid distance and mutter the six train York City humor. All right, what about your writing process?
What have you learned? Jordan Tepple said, When I started comedy, I think I was trying to be too clever. I was just young, which I still am. But Now I think of all the ways my senses can help me develop different kinds of jokes, whether they’re clever or not. Now I try to be clever and the dumbest way possible, and also dumb in the most clever way possible.
I’m also big on self encouragement. I started writing down the middle of my stand up sets, keep going, you’re doing great, and telling the audience. There’s no notes. All it says is keep going, you’re doing great? All right?
What comedy hill will you die on? I love this one. Shorts. You can wear shorts on stage. I think shorts should be mandatory.
In fact, the longer you’re set, the shorter your shorts should be. Donald Glover was way out of his time wearing those tiny shorts. Where do you think he got all this power from? People were like, good, why is he wearing those baby shorts? Now look at him?
Normalize short shorts, Lean into your power. Love it not your comedy needs for today? Follow the show for free on let’s say Spotify, pocket cast. If you’re on an Android, you could follow it on overcast. This Apple podcast, but a minut at them with this new update that’s killing the back catalog downloads Apple.
You are killing me Johnny Mack’s Gotta Eat, See you tomorrow,