🎙️ Listen to this episode:
Full Transcript
Caloroga Shark Media. Howdy. I’m Johnny Mack with your Daily Comedy News, the daily briefing on stand up comedy, comedians and the comedy industry. A sentence the algorithm loves. We’re gonna find out how good my noise reduction and plug in is because I have the fan on.
There’s just no fresh oxygen here in my little studio. I just need to circulate the air. But that’s not why you’re here. You’re here to learn more about Colin Jost and Pete Davidson’s Ferry Well good news. Colin Jost was on the SmartLess podcast and says it’s very misreported that the Fairry is some sort of crazy money pit.
Colin said, I joke about it a lot, but we’ve done some events on it where we’ve already made back the money we’ve invested in, the money we’ve spent on stuff to dock it and all that. Colin says that the John F. Kennedy is the same ferry he often took when commuting to high school. He said, it was usually the seven am ferry that I took because I went up to this high school called Recha’s High School that’s up on the Upper east Side. I didn’t know, Colin jo just went to regis interesting and it’s free if you get in.
It’s a really great school. All right. What are you gonna do with the ferry now? Colin Joe said, they want to use it either as an event space or an entertainment venue. But it’s been a long process to try and find a place to dock it.
Colin says, I was thinking in a real estate way, if you put it somewhere, it’s seventy thousand square feet. So I was like, if you put that on a dock in Manhattan, you’ve suddenly got basically a building on the waterfront. There also may be an altruistic version of this. Colin said, growing up in Staten Island, I went to this place called the Great Hill Swim Club. It was a swim club where people would just go and the kids could all hang out, the adults could hang out.
I could imagine creating a place like that that’s not a weird, fancy members club, but is actually more middle class in Manhattan. That’s never gonna happen. Let me know when that happens. Colin. He imagined a swimming board on the deck and a seasonal transfer to Miami to take advantage of Florida’s sunny winters.
There’s no way a ferry is going all the way down to Florida. None of that is going to happen. Ever. Tim Hideker caught up with The Hollywood Reporter the topic taking over info wars Highecker’s and said, it’s been a wild ride. I’ve been involved behind the scenes for several months.
I love playing with these people, and I’ve been following Alex Jones and the QAnon stuff for so long. I offered my help and heard nothing, because at that point it was kind of a stalemate. But it came back again last fall. There was a new energy behind it and they reached out to me. My initial thought was, Yeah, if you get this thing, it’ll be fun for a little while.
But then what where do you take it? How do you continue to jab at him? But maybe not in a direct satirical way. The idea from Tim what the world needs right now is a home for the people who used to make shows on Adult Swim in Comedy Central and are now scattered around social media making great stuff that isn’t curated and certainly not funded. Could the ultimate joke be that this turns into a place for thriving creativity and humor and goodwill.
Not Hackey stand up Specials, Not Rambling, four hour conspiratorial podcast by people who do sets at the comedy store Good Stuff. Robbie Hoffman was on the Not Skinny but Not Fat podcast and said, I’m the boy in my relationship. I pay a lot when somebody else is paying. It’s unusual for me. Robbie said, when she travels solo for work, she likes to keep things low key.
But when her wife, Gabby comes along, that’s when I splurge. We’re pressing play on the movie at the same time as a whole different experience, Robbie said, Gabby is a first class woman. People don’t want to see gabbin me necessarily an economy. They want a dream. We’ve been at it, They’ve seen us, and they’re like, hard work does not pay off at all, Like the American dream is that dead.
King Charles visited the United States this week. That leads to all sorts of stories that we’re going to talk about. Let’s start with some jokes from Jimmy Kimmel. The King of England is in the United States, King Charles and Queen Camilla are here to visit President beef on Wellington.
And also they have quite an itinerary.
They’re going to New York. They’re making a stop at the Wisconsin Dells. They’re going to a screening of the Delaware’s product to at the Burbank amc and I guess they’re wrapping it up with a fish concert in Vegas at the Sphere. Trump has a particular affinity for the royal family, and so in Washington they pulled out all the stops to welcome the King and Queen. The Department of Transportation lined the streets with what they thought was the Union jack.
The British flag turned out to be the Australian flag. Well, they had to take them all down and swap them out. Somehow, they they managed to screw everything up. It was a literal false flag operation going on there. Yesterday, the Royals joined the Trump’s for afternoon tea, and boy, would I love to be a fly on the cucumber sandwiches for that conversation.
No way, Trump was drinking tea, right. I bet they boiled some diet coke and put it in a cup for him. King Charles delivered a speech today before a joint session of Congress. His goal in this trip is to try to calm transatlantic tensions. Trump heard this ease and the Atlantic is transit out too now.
In this next section, the President was talking about his own parents and how they were together for sixty three years. Trump looks over at Milania and says, we’re not going to make it that long. Kimmel had some thoughts about that. Let’s listen. Trump was very excited about hosting the King, and a lot of it is because Trump’s mom was a great fan of the royal family.
My wonderful mother, Mary McLeod. She came to America at nineteen met my incredible father. We loved him so much. We all loved him, We loved her, We loved him Fred and they were married for sixty three years. And excuse me, if you don’t mind, that’s a record we won’t be able to match, Darling.
I’m sorry, just not going to work out that way. Wait a minute, did he just make a joke about his death? We should be fired for that. Only Donald Trump would demand I be fired for making a joke about his old age.
And then a daily go out and make a joke about his own all day.
Adam Carolla has come to Jimmy Kimmel’s defense about that whole backlash from the expectant widow joke. Corolla and I agree with this said, that’s a pretty typical roast joke. It’s also a trope any younger, beautiful woman who’s married to an older guy, especially if the guy’s rumored to be sort of douchey. You’d make that joke at any roast. Send your letters to Adam Carolla.
Ted Cruz, sticking up for Jimmy Kimmel sort of, I had mentioned that the FCC was possibly, perhaps maybe looking at the Disney TV licenses. Ted Cruz said, it is not government’s job to censor speech, and I do not believe the FCC should operate as the speech police. Stephen Colbert was profiled by The New York Times. I’m holding on to most of it for the week of Colbert’s last show, but one thing that came up is that after the first few months on the Late Show, his producer encouraged him to lean back into politics. Colbert said, at first the plan was to back away from politics after leaving the Colbert rapport.
Stephen told The Times it was my instinct to be less topical because I didn’t want to have to engage with what I saw was an increasingly contentious public discourse, and I thought, aren’t there other ways to have fun with the audience. But after the twenty sixteen National Party conventions gave Colbert an opportunity to do politics, Steven said he felt like Clint east Wood in Unforgiven. He buried his guns, and I’m like, you know, I buried those guns. I was talking to Paul Zanello, he’s one of my oldest friends and one of my producers here, and he’s like, you’re having fun. People love to see that.
And I said, but that means I gotta go dig up the guns. And he says, buddy, that’s the part the audience wants to see. Josh Johnson had some jokes about the ballroom. He told these on The Daily Show and told them much better than I will. But Josh said, I can’t believe they dissolved dose right before Trump demanded a four hundred million dollar ballroom.
It’s like how the Michael Jackson movie ended, right before he starts some molesting. You just went ahead and skipped all the important stuff. Huh. Honestly, as soon as I heard about the ballroom, I knew we had end up paying for it, Like Trump is the type of dude to win and dine you and then forget his wallet. One more, Josh said.
Don’t get me wrong, with so many seniors getting scammed in America, I’m glad one of them is turning the tables. I just don’t want it to be on us. Comedy stock Market. Thank you, Burt Reynolds Voice of the Comedy stock Market. That really is Burt Reynolds AI voice properly licensed.
Don’t worry about that. Talk to his estate. I don’t know. I just saw it available. I went, yeah, all right, I’ll use Burt Reynolds.
That’s fun, all right. This week’s Comedy stock Market is looking ahead to next week. It’s the Netflix is a Joe Comedy Festival, and I’ve got some buy recommendations. Let’s buy even some more Osco at Cotska because I’ve seen her latest hour and when she does it in LA in front of all the fancy press people, people are gonna notice because this hour is really good. She’s part of the festival.
So let’s buy some more Otsco. Let’s buy some Dave Chappelle. I know it’s obvious. It’s like me telling you to buy I don’t know apple stock, but yeah, let’s buy Dave Chappelle. He announced three shows at the festival.
They’re gonna be great. Everyone’s gonna be like Dave’s awesome. Some people are gonna get mad at some things, he says. You listen to the show, you know how this all goes. So yeah, let’s buy some Dave Chappelle.
Let’s buy some more Flight of the Concords. I just got a feeling. Yeah, okay, maybe the tickets aren’t quite six hundred and ten dollars anymore, but market correction. To me, that was always absurd. But I think people are gonna be really happy that those guys are back.
And I’ve got one more on the comedy stock market. I didn’t realize how funny this next person is. But here’s who we’re gonna buy, King Charles. I’ll play in a clip in a second, But those are your recommendations this week by Osco at Coonska by Dave Chappelle. Buy Flight of the Concords by King Charles, No sells Johnny Macker you had a good mood for once.
I know, right, Nope, no seals this week, all buys, All right, King Charles is actually really funny. He gave some great speeches. You can hear them all on the Palace Intrigue podcast. I’m the writer on that one. I was quoted in USA Today, and man other aggregators aggregated the USA Today article.
I’m in like all these publications all of a sudden because I am, of course a expert, which makes me smile. But I’ve also been writing the podcast for seven years. At this point, I really do know more about the British royal family than your average American. Now, your average brit not at all. But for a kid from Queen’s I’m pretty good anyway.
King Charles is hilarious. Let’s listen this said. French friends can feel equally at home with a glass at a map. Indeed, you recently commented, mister President, that if it were not for the United States, European countries would be speaking German. Dare I say that if it wasn’t for us, you’d be speaking French.
Now. I don’t know how King Charles would feel about a recent show. Jenny Zigrino did. She dressed up as King George the Third. Yeah, that guy, the one we broke up with.
Two hundred and fifty years ago, Jenny was hosting a historical late night talk show called History Tonight. She was joined by Rob Crean, whose day job is a tour guide on the Freedom Trail. Rob Bla George’s sidekick former Prime Minister George Grenville. All the comics on the bill dressed as historical figures. Jenny explained, when I first moved to Boston for college, for Halloween, I dressed up as Amedeus and everybody thought I was Thomas Jefferson, which I was pretty mad about.
Jenny is a history buff. She hosted a show called Badass Bitches of History on Comedy Central’s digital channel in twenty eighteen, chronicling the contributions of mostly unheritled women. She says she wants to get back to some of her historical roots. She said, I’m just gonna embrace it. I’ve always loved history, so why not just do it now.
Even though she might have an Revolution era powdered wig on it doesn’t mean she can’t comment on current events. She said. It might even offer a better perspective. To talk about things like the no King’s protests, she said, and send her letters to her. You guys don’t want a king, but you have a mad king in office because you’re a character.
If you’re more leeway in what you could say. Having King George the Third, especially in drag because I’m a drag king talking about this, it’s more impactful than it was just me on stage doing it. Love it cultured magas and put out there Cultured one hundred. One of the Cultured one hundred is Caleb Heroon. They asked Caleb what keeps you up at night, and Caleb said, the size of the oceans in outer space.
I have to lie on myself when it comes up. I think about black holes and I get scared and then I go, that’s a myth, buddy, go to sleep and that helps, all right, Caleb, what are you looking forward to this year? Eating a grilled hot dog by a lake with just a tiny little sunburn this summer. Name and influence of yours that might surprise people, Caleb told the Culture Monique. Growing up, my dad showed me a lot of stand up by straight guys, and I liked it.
When I saw Monique’s Queens of Comedy set. She was outrageous and quick and fat and sexy and confident. I just couldn’t look away.
And then she does precious legend in every sense of the word.
And if you’re in New Zealand, the New Zealand Comedy Festival has kicked off, taking place all month long now. The folks at stuff dot co dot Nz your home for New Zealand. Comedy News asked some of the comedians performing who they would go see. Courtney Dawson says, to go see the Coro Conicles by Hated Dawson, who happens to be her dad. Apparently her dad was always the cool dad growing up all right.
Abby Howell says, go see nos Feratu looking for Love. It’s funny, weird, I’ve seen it multiple times. Rhanna McCall dresses up as no s Faratu night after night with bald cap, white paint and full turtleneck under theater lights. She’s a madman. That’s fun.
Jerome Chandra Hazen says, go see Zach and Liza bought a gun. He says, I’ve never heard anyone else extole the virtues of Bucky’s gas stations for ten minutes and have the entire room enthralled. Joe Damon said, I’d like to recommend Sean Collier, who I believe his hands down one of the best comedians of the country. He juggles being a full time lawyer and recently moved to Australia for better prospects. It is absolutely killing it.
He’s still young and will be in his twenties when he hits a decade in comedy. Felicity Ward also says Rihanna and McCall on that no s Faratu show, so I will have to keep an eye on that.
And also Tom Sainsbury, an irresistible charmbag that manages to somehow unlo…
The New Zealand International Comedy Festival today through the twenty fourth in Auckland and Wellington. One of these years I’m gonna do is like some massive international comedy festival tour. But this year I’m not even going to Los Angeles. I wanted to go, but my daughter who’s out there, is home from college in two weeks and you heard me tell the story already. Okay, I’ll see you tomorrow.