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Caloroga Shark Media finally know a little naughty today. All right, if you usually listen with the kids, I won’t say naughty words, but the topics a little naughty. Maybe go listen to something else. Illom Johnny Mack with your Daily Comedy News. John Oliver got all involved with this jd Vance rumor.
This is where we’re gonna get naughty. You have been warned. I don’t know if you heard the rumor. Supposedly, perhaps possibly maybe jd Vance made love to a sofa. That’s right, and John Oliver said, I’ve never seen someone with more couch effort energy On last week tonight, Oliver said, you can say that he didn’t write about doing that in his book, because that is provable.
But that’s not the same as asserting that he never banged a couch, especially because he hasn’t officially denied it. Oliver continued, jd Vance sucks so much that it says something that For a few days this week, the internet ran wild with a joke tweet that he was the first VP pick to have admitted in a New York Times bestseller to banging I’ll clean it up a couch with a citation and that was cleaning it up with a citation to a page and number from his memoir He’ll Billy Elogy, a memoir of a family and culture in crisis. Oliver said, it’s not in his book, but I think the reason it spread so fast is that it’s incredibly easy to believe. Because if he asked me to draw a man that bangs his couch ten times out of ten, I’m drawing this guy, and he showed a photo of Jade Vance. If he asked me to play two truths and a lie with this man, before he even opens his mouth, I shout the truth is that he bangs his couch.
I’ve never seen someone with more couch banging energy. Oliver continued, he looks like he watched the Tom Cruise Oprah interview and was jealous of Tom’s shoes. Oliver also talked about the EIGHTP decision to post a fact check with the headline no, jd Vance did not have sex with a couch. Oliver said that his staff reached out to Vance’s campaign last week to ask if Vance has ever had sex with a couch. Oliver says, they hung up on us, which is and this is critical, not a no is it.
Chelsea Handler also mixing it up with JD Vance. She put out a video that did quite well in Instagram. Chelsea says to put it in women hating terms. You understand you’re being hysterical. Listen up, you wingnut elegy.
This country is still controlled by men and systems that were set up by men, that are carefully crafted to continue to benefit men. Let’s be clear, there’s no correlation between childless people and the presidency. For example, our very first president, mister George Washington, didn’t have children. In fact, he had two step children like someone else I know. A reference to Vice President Kamala Harris to your point abou Kamala not being fit because she’s not a mother.
I’d like trm on you that no president in the history of the United States has ever been a mother. Maybe if she had five kids with three different men and a scandalous affair with a porn star and was a convicted felon, that would be more palatable to Republican men. Okay, So I will try and be fear here. I’m going to google on the fly here where it’s like Biden and Harris. If I find something funny, I will do it.
If not, I can’t. If you want to send me something, I’ll make fun of them tomorrow. I’m just here for the comedy. It’s one forty two pm on Monday, July twenty ninth. Biden Google search Joe Biden, my planner reformed the Supreme Court.
Not funny. Let’s type in Harris, same thing. Just news about the polls. Send me a story, I’ll keep it fair. Bad news for Amy Schumer.
Life and Beth canceled by Hulu. I’m not sure that ever had any buzz other than Amy Schumer doing a lot of press before both seasons. Life and Beth followed Beth, played by Amy Schumer, who had a cool job, a great apartment, and a boyfriend who’s in New York eight who realizes she’s not happy with her life after the death of her mother. John Stewart, who is calling out major news organizations, John said on his podcast The Weekly Show, it’s difficult for us to book pundits or journalists that are on TV. Their organizations will not let them come on our podcast.
Let that sink in for a minute. Organizations that rely on access and transparency refuse to allow the reporters to come on a podcast to talk about the issues of the day. I want people at home to let that sink in for a second. News organizations stonewall inquiries as to why their reporters are not allowed or being restricted from just being able to come on a stupid podcast and give their opinion. I understand you can’t go write articles for other papers, you can’t host a show on another network, but these types of promotional or crosspot nuning appearances should be standard fair.
He specifically called out MSNBC and CNN as particular offenders.
Meanwhile, on Gossip Corner, some people think Shane Gillis is dating TikTok …
As you may have picked up. I don’t spend a lot of time on TikTok. I’m unfamiliar with Grace. Let’s see what she does on TikTok. A famous birthdays dot com says she’s a TikTok star who is best known for her Grease Johannah account, where she posts comedy and POV videos, often about being at a sorority.
Basil on Instagram shared photos of her and Shane Gillis at San Francisco forty nine er running back Christian McCaffrey’s a Tealian theme to welcome party at Ocean House, a stunning seaside resort located on the bluffs of Watch Hill. One of the photos showed her posing closely with Shane Gillis. It went viral when someone joked that they look like an SEC couple. In her post, she also included a black and white photo of her Sheen Gillis and post malone. Hey, big shout out to Kenny.
Kenny’s been a listener for a long time. By the way, today begins year six of this podcast. Growth Wise, I’m beyond where I thought it’d be. A year two, there was a pesky pandemic in the way, and then last November Apple cut the numbers. But I’m plugging away here.
But I can’t believe it is year six of the podcast, Season six, Episode one, Kenny, thank you for listening all this time. As Kenny knows, there’s a particular Starbucks out in California. I’ve made a connection with Kenny, and I always think of Kenny when I’m at that particular Starbucks. He sent me over four coffees. Thank you very much, and we will support Kenny is a coffee purveyor of choice already mentioned in this podcast, Thank you Kenny.
Meanwhile, I was at the National Donuts Chain and you know, I hold the door for people, and then I look behind me and somebody said thank you in a very pleasant voice. You know who was? Have you been paying attention? You know who it is? Right by the way, Mike from the Letterman podcast, did you just hear me going to pour Men’s there?
That was for you? You know who was? Yeah? It was evil Bill Ingvall. Now he doesn’t know he’s evil, and he doesn’t seem to be evil.
He seems like a pretty nice guy. But he does look like evil Bill Inkfall. Anyway, he’s at the National Donuts Chain a few times a week. If you’d like to buy me a coffee, you go to buy me a coffee. Dot com a slash a Daily Comedy News.
There are some money on the tip jar. I will take your money and I will go to the National Dome chain or Kenny’s place. Sometimes my daughter goes there and to make her get me something. And they’re talking about opening a McDonald’s in town, and I don’t know how I feel about that, but they have ice coffee as well. Might give me more options.
Have you been watching the Olympics. You know who’s not good at it? Colin Jost He’s terrible. Sorry, Colin, You’re awesome on SNL. You’re married to Scarlett Johansson.
You’re a good looking guy, you’re funny, you’re on top of the world. Many things can be true once you’re not good at the Olympics. His segments to me have seemed very forced. He is covering surfing in Tahiti, but it’s just not working in my opinion. Sam Maruril was talking Deadline.
He said, part of the reason I fell in love with a comedy of Chris Rock is because he’d push you away in the premise and pull you back at the punchline. It’s like a dance he did with the crowd. He’d say something provocative and then prove it to be true. But you can’t just say the provocative thing. You have to pull it off.
You have to stick to landing. When you do an hour of material, it can’t be one thing. If you’re just going for shock, that’ll run dry pretty quickly. You need levels and you need layers if you’re going to do that. The new special SAMs it’s got a lot of gears.
Are you psyched for the first annual Columbus Comedy Festival coming up August fourteenth through the eighteenth. Walker Evans is the co founder and says we couldn’t be more excited to not only bring major headliners to Columbus from New York, LA, Chicago and beyond, but also highlights are incredibly talented local comedy scene. We’ve packed a lot of entertainment in these five days and there’s a little something for everyone. Good lineup headliners include Jason Banks, Michael ian Black, who’s been super political. He’s got a super political substag.
If you’re mad at me for the first two stories today and again, send me other stories. I’ll do them. Just make sure he sent them to me by like noon Tuesday. That’s on I tend to record. Michael ian Blacks been very very political lately, Tony Rock, Irene Two fumu Abe, Diane Smith, Chloe Radcliffe, Jeremiah Watkins, Ian Finance, Sam Jay Salter, Hio, Simon Fraser, Orlando Laba, Tom the car River Butcher Rivers, fab Justine Marino, Alex Falcone, Christine Toomey, Dan Donahue, Amina Amani, Pat Butcher, Chris Allen, Ramon Revas the Second, Leah Simpson, Mary Santora, Mandy mcclevey, Calson Wilson, Alex Dragovic, satoyo Ekbo, Maddie Ryan, Kelly Collette, and dozens more.
That’s a lot of performers. There’ll be in multiple venues including the Columbus Funny Bone, The Key, the Columbus Performing Arts Center, Mad Lab, the Attic Comedy Club, the Nests Theater, the Hashtag Comedy Company, and Don’t Tell Comedy, Columbus Improv sketch video showcases, live pods, variety shows, and Moore. They’ve got a lot of sponsors, including a coffee place. Hm. I might have to connect with these guys, see if we can do some uses together.
The Columbus Comedy Festival. I was going to send Deacon Mike there. Deacon Mike’s out in New York Cleveland, but Columbus is two hours, eight minutes away. He’s not going to do that for me. Thanks, never nothing, Deacon Mike.
The National Comedy Center and the Elkhorn Valley Museum announced they will jointly exhibit documents and pieces from the archive collection of Johnny Carson journey Gunderson, who, if everything goes according to plan, will be the guest on this program on Thursday. I’m supposed to tape with her in exactly twenty minutes from now. I will ask her about this journeys. For thirty years, Johnny kept the country laughing through good times in bad while also introducing us to many of the greatest stand up comedians ever to take the stage. The story of comedy in America zipply cannot be told properly without presenting Johnny Carson’s enormous and invaluable contribution to the art form.
Great quote. Jeff Satzing is Johnny’s nephew. I know Jeff a little bit, and he is the president of Carson Entertainment, tasked with keeping the flame alive. He has done a great job. Jeff will provide various documents from Johnny’s creative process to archive in the collection.
And that is your comedy news for today again. I know the first two stories were loaded political one way. If you got the other story, send it to me. I will do it. N’t your companies for to day See tomorrow