🎙️ Listen to this episode:
Full Transcript
Caloroga Shark Media, Merry Christmas and Johnny Mack with your Daily Comedy News over the holidays. Have you gone to Crumble the Cookie Place? Found out one of my students actually works on the one right by my home, So that’s awkward in there. When I go and order a Jimmy Fallon Brownie and she’s gonna be like, really, dude, I mean she works, She’ll be like, oh no, that’s a good choice, sir. What’s the problem with Jimmy Fallon Brownie?
It’s got twelve hundred calories. It is a holiday peppermint brownie called the Limited Edition Candy Cane Brownie, a chocolate treat smothered in peppermint buttercream and topped with candy cane bits. Foodies have said it is Crumble Cookie’s highest calorie item, yet, according to the nutritional information, each serving is only one hundred and eighty calories. As if you’re not gonna eat the whole brownie, the Crumbled people are trying to pretend that brownie has six servings per brownie. Come on, dude, no, it has one and it’s twelve hundred calories.
Jimmy Fallon’s clared it was the best brownie he’s ever had. Some TikTokers are not convinced the dessert is worth the inches on your waistline. One content creator said, tell me who in their right mind, and especially an American, is going to be eating this in six settings. That’s not realistic at all. Another content creator said, nobody needs that many calories.
No wonder the US has such a high obesity rate. Let’s break down the nutritional information. Okay, the brownie contains one hundred and twenty one grams of sugar and one hundred grams of added sugar. That’s two hundred and two percent of the average daily intake. There are also forty grams of saturated fat, which coincidentally, and I’m wondering if this is actually a coincidence or like there’s some reason they did this.
That’s also two hundred and two percent of the daily recommended intake. The Center for Disease Control and Prevention recommends that sugar should be less than ten percent of daily calories consumed in a two thousand calorie diet. That equates to approximately twelve tea spoons of added sugar, depending on your nutritional needs. The CDC says this adults should consume anywhere from sixteen hundred to three thousand calories total per day. The Jimmy Fallon Krumble brownie, therefore, could be almost all of someone’s daily caloric intake.
Professor Darwin Dettweiler from Northeastern University told The Daily Mail. Without clear labeling, consumers may underestimate the caloric and nutritional content, which is particularly concerning with oversized portions like those Crumble offers. If these cookies were firearms, they would be illegal. Are you gonna watch football today? I’m Netflix knows what they’re doing.
Christmas is totally just going to turn into day. We watch football. Now. When you have young kids, or our young kid, Christmas morning is amazing. You go play with your stuff.
But once the kids are grown up, we kind of sit around the tree for ten minutes and then everybody scatters. So, yeah, football on Christmas Day makes sense to me. You go Netflix? Oh, I’m just not. Bert Kraser will join at Netflix as a tailgate correspondent today and my comedian of the Year, the slightly starting to be overexposed Nate Berghetzie is going to be a special guest your lineup today.
One o’clock Chiefs, Steelers four point thirty Ravens Texans Beyonce scheduled to be the halftime performer. Al dot Com caught up with Jim Brewer. I don’t have my Jim brew impression. I’ve been losing my brew impression. Part of it is you’ve heard me talk on and off about how I’ve had this fuzz in my voice.
Now to do Jim, I need to get down a little more raspy. I always reset my half assed Gim Brewer impression, and back in the day when I worked with him, I did it pretty well, especially capturing the way he spoke in his rhythm. I used to write copy for Jim because I worked with him all the time and I have a good year for that sort of thing. But I remember the first time I met Jim. We were sitting at a high tabletop at Sirius and this is what he said and how I always reset it.
He was telling Hi about the show and he goes, it’s me my friend Pete Pete being Pete Corioley and I tell right, so you have to get down a little bit in a little gravelly. But I haven’t been able to do it because I’ve been having the voice issues. And part of the reason I’m having the voice issues is because a lot of pretaping for a holiday week. So instead of doing like one podcast to day, there are bed days, I’ve been doing four because I not only host this, I also host five good News stories. So I’ve been blowing out my voice.
Ail dot Com Asper who he enjoyed working with on SNL, and he said, Tom Hanks was the first star that came on for us. He was a megastar at the time, Like, oh my god, how did we get Tom Hanks? And I just couldn’t believe how engaging it was. That really blew my mind. It’s really funny because Alec Baldwin, as much as he drives me crazy with the things he says, he was probably one of the most engaging, very funny.
He was incredible. John Goodman, Jim Carrey, he just came in and everything he did he at home run. Then they asked him about working with Dave Chappelle on the film A Half Baked Jim said, we had a chemistry before that movie started. We were already in the comedy club scene. We had the same manager hung out a lot in the comedy scene.
We both were kind of hot names coming up, and so we already had a major history before or Half Baked. We were going to do a TV show together, so the chemistry was easy to do. And I knew that doing that movie that you’re never gonna be on a set like this again where everyone gets along and everyone’s helping each other out. That just doesn’t exist. Uh oh, Jim, better be careful here.
They asked him. Taylor Swift will be eligible for a Rock and Roll Hall of Fame induction in twenty thirty one. There’s a solid chance she gets in before Iron Maiden. Jim laughed and said, I don’t pay attention to who’s in the Hall of Fame. Hall of fames are meant for the people that actually make the real money out of the whole situation.
What a Jim Brewer answered, Jim always finds the conspiracy and everything, But yeah, he’s probably right. Hall of fames are for the people that actually make the real money out of the whole situation. So at the end of the day, it’s just like the government. Before government, we knew who the doctor was, we knew who the wise people were, we knew who the helpers were. We need to vote on it.
You’re always gonna know where maiden stands in history. All right? I got my half assed jim back there a little bit. A comedian Gary Delaney tells the lad Bible one of his favorite jokes is his most stolen joke by a mile. He says he originally performed the joke in two thousand and four, and the joke has shown up on countless t shirts and the pages of joke books.
Delaney said, I get stolen from a lot. I’ve seen comics do sets made above one hundred percent of my jokes. Nothing you do about it, but it’s annoying. All right, what is the joke? I went to buy a Christmas tree.
The guy said, are you gotta put it up yourself? And I said no, I was thinking about the living room. All right. Vultures did their list of the comedians you should know and will know. One of those comedians Brennan Lee mulligan.
Worst show was at a bar in Williamsburg where the audience’s chairs were physically removed mid show to make room for a bridal party that crashed the bar because they’d been kicked out of their own wedding venue. Bride’smaid wandered on stage and we called the set shortly thereafter. Biggest financial hurdle you’ve encountered since becoming a comedian, Probably the biggest one was needing emergency dental surgery for my number eight incisor one of the two most visible teeth right in front of your mouth, and only being able to afford it by flying to Costa Rica. Yikes. I highly recommend dental tourism to anyone who’s worried about affording both rent and their teeth.
The dental clinic I went to did great work and offered a discount on a nearby rainforest zip line excursion. Comedy opinions. The customer is always right. If the audience isn’t laughing at you, it’s because you’re not being funny enough to get a laugh. Bombing on stage and then blaming the audience after the factor.
Being too sensitive is for chumps and losers. Another one of the comedians is Malik Ela sal whose career would he like to follow? He says, any comedian who’s married. A comedian being married with kids is more impressive to me than if they sold out Madison Square Garden Comedy opinion I don’t like the idea that comedy is unimportant. I think comedy’s perfect and comedians are flawed.
I feel the same way about religion and religious people. I don’t think we should be the go to for answers on the big issues. But I still believe comedy is a meaningful art form. A comedian friend of mine, Charlie de Mahers, once told me comedy is a brick you throw through a window that turns into stained glass. That being said, there are a lot of shows where you feel like you’re the equivalent of bowling.
No shade to the bowling community. Worst advice he ever gotten was from his dad, who told him to steal Kevin hartch jokes little short today. But that’s your comedy news on a Christmas. If you’re listening on Christmas, thank you for listening on Christmas. And if you’re playing catch up after Christmas, thank you.
Thank for playing catch up after Christmas. I will continue to have daily episodes for you here see tomorrow.